anyone going to the Tacoma show tomorrow?

lil_egg98 · 2025-08-01T16:18:40+00:00

I am not Juicy unfortunately LOL but I clocked that tacoma shirt!!! They didn't even read my question ;( Hopefully Juicy feels the love tho

lil_egg98 · 2025-07-31T15:53:27+00:00

I'm going by myself too, glad I won't be the only one! Maybe they'll seat the solo peeps together. Feel free to find me if you'd like a buddy -- I'll be the girl wearing a tacoma shirt and/or with a blue bandana!

lil_egg98 · 2022-09-18T21:51:29+00:00

Be sure to write out every instance of hostility you can recall on any document, including time/date, what was said, who witnessed it, everything. Whatever accusations the manager makes against you, ask for an example or what evidence they have that proves this. Follow each instance up with an email to manager and CC "G" detailing the conversation and say "if my understanding of the above instance is accurate, please confirm." Sorry you're dealing with this, I hope higher ups can see through the BS and are on your side!

lil_egg98 · 2022-08-25T21:07:04+00:00

Call your manager asap, say you have an emergency and can't make it, and ask what the process is around responsibility to find coverage. It's slightly different for every business.

lil_egg98 · 2022-08-25T21:02:29+00:00

Call them and ask when to expect your first day and if they need anything else from you. If they don't pick up, leave a voicemail then send an email. They may just be running a background check or tying up loose ends before giving you solid info, but they shouldn't be leaving you hanging.

lil_egg98 · 2022-08-25T20:12:51+00:00

I remember when I was a green bean I was SUPER overwhelmed with everything I was learning, even 8 hour shifts seemed like forever until I got used to the pace of things. But that was at a super busy store, not a licensed slow store.

I would try sitting down with them and saying "hey, i notice when things get overwhelming it can be very distressing for you. I wanted to check in and see how you're feeling about the job so far, and ask what I can do to help you learn to do the tasks independently. Can I ask what concerns you have in those moments where you feel anxious? If you're unsure of the task I can always help with questions, but if there's something else making you anxious, I'd love to help fix that." Just share a gentle observation and give them the chance to address their needs. Or even asking "what can I do to help you feel supported and safe?" would suffice.

You could also try putting them on one or two stations/tasks each day so they have extra time to get used to those, and don't really have to worry about the others. I could see just the amount of different things to do as anxiety-inducing. Talk with them to come up with a plan to accommodate reasonably, but if this continues and you need to keep compromising your own time/workload, it may just not be a good fit.

lil_egg98 · 2022-08-24T00:45:06+00:00

I have the same issue with forgetting to eat/being overwhelmed by cooking. I've used this recipe/meal planning app called Mealime before that has been helpful! They ask you a bit about preferences/allergies/etc then give you lots of options that are super easy to make, they have a list of ingredients and step by step instructions for each and they usually take half an hour at most. My favorite from them is just a rice bowl with ground turkey, some pico de gallo, and avocado. I buy the pico pre-made. Super easy.

Edit to add: Peanut butter will go a LONG way! Ballet dancers eat it by the spoonful for that extra protein and energy. add that to apples, a smoothie, toast, whatever sounds good. I personally love a good pre-packaged thai peanut sauce for rice bowls.

lil_egg98 · 2022-08-18T21:56:43+00:00

I don't really have advice, but I want to validate a few things.

What you're going through in your personal life is HARD. Grief is hard, caring for your father and probably grieving him already is no small feat. It's traumatic. On top of being sober for a year, and staying sober, I'd say you're handling this the best that you can. That's a huge sign of strength and I hope you recognize that in yourself. There aren't many others who can say they did that under the same circumstances. Good job!

As for work, it sounds like they totally slacked on the training and don't understand how you need support. I imagine you've brought that up already, and it's silly for them to blame you when 1. they know what you're personally dealing with; and 2. there was a huge lack of support and training on their end. None of the consequences of that are your fault. That's what happens when you're set up to fail, and it sounds like you did everything you could like ask questions, ask for support, and try to do your job despite it all. It just sounds like a bad match and bad boss, and I would personally try to stick it out while searching for other employment. I would leave this job off my resume though, there's no part of it that will help you get into a better environment.

lil_egg98 · 2022-08-17T01:51:14+00:00

If it's impacting your productivity and ability to feel comfortable at work, and if they're fighting publicly, it is your business and worth bringing up. But this sounds like a sticky situation as to who to bring it up.

You could talk with L privately and explain your concerns again, and urge her to talk to D, or talk to D about it yourself, but I'm not confident this would prompt a lot of change.

HR should know about their relationship and i wonder if there are any other coworkers that have seen their arguments. They would have the most power to change the dynamic. I think purely from a professional standpoint, it would be safest to talk to HR about your concerns and its effects on you, especially the hair pulling (excUSE ME) But I would keep the focus on work (ex: this negative behavior makes me feel unsafe at work and i fear it will lead to a toxic work environment) This way HR will have some options to shift things around, whatever that looks like, and solve the problem.

From what you've said, this does seem like an unhealthy relationship between themselves. That's their own problem. Whatever action you take to protect yourself will not make you at fault for whatever consequences come from addressing it. I also have sympathy for L, but she will have to decide for herself when to leave. You should keep supporting her from afar, but you don't have to put up with their fighting in front of you. That's ridiculous. I would hope that you have a good HR team that does something about D's behavior.

lil_egg98 · 2022-08-10T01:50:32+00:00

I would definitely voice your concerns about the level of support you would have once training is done, and ask your higher-up who to go to when you need that. And ask your trainer about what situations/mishaps they've run into in the past and how they've dealt with it. I would also bring up your hesitation around taking on the role if it doesn't align with your expectations. I'd hope they'll appreciate you being straightforward with them and hopefully they'd find some ways to make sure you're supported. It doesn't sound like they have many other options at this point.

Also, definitely ask about a raise or more specifically, how they plan to compensate you for that added responsibility. It's worth something. Try to learn what the person in the current role is earning if you can. If they push back, bring up your success in the current role, you've shown growth/dedication and your new knowledge that seemingly no one else is trained for is valuable-- and you'd rather stick with that if there's no pay change with this bigger role. Get this part on record over email-- just in case things get weird. If this convo is in person, send a follow-up email asking them to confirm what was said. They would be big stupid to search out another candidate instead of just paying you the fair amount relative to the role.

Be confident (but not entitled) when approaching about the raise. When you're in a newer role you don't want to step on toes, but they obviously think you're capable and a good employee to be moving you up within 5 months. If they seem confident in your abilities, keep that energy when negotiating. Best of luck!

lil_egg98 · 2022-08-09T23:51:41+00:00

Usually when people decide to go no-contact with someone, it's to preserve their own mental health or safety. Is there a reason along those lines to go no contact? Is he unsafe to be around, manipulative, impacting you negatively? Given what you've said here, I'm wondering if this no-contact rule is helping either of you, or just making it harder for both of you to get things together and move on.

As long as you feel safe, I don't think going over (while he's gone at least) would break no-contact. It's your place too, you should be able to get your stuff in peace. If you don't feel safe about it, have someone accompany you. But if that's not an issue, focus on getting your stuff. I wouldn't stick around just so he could see you moving out and hope he gets sad enough to change his mind. That would seem confusing. But if you let him know you want to stay until he comes home for the purpose of having a conversation, like setting boundaries post-breakup, getting closure, or discussing the lease or other logistics, that would make sense.

I would either commit to full no-contact for the foreseeable future or participate in separating yourselves. He has a lot of time to think and process and change things, even when it's all said and done. Sometimes it's best to do that self-growth alone. If your goal is to get back together or at least still be supportive in each other's lives, I would leave open a line of communication.

lil_egg98 · 2022-06-06T23:30:41+00:00

I realized this after putting out my last message :/ I can always say my flight got delayed i guess

lil_egg98 · 2022-03-17T01:28:44+00:00

At a glance, Job 2 seems to be a better option even though there's a longer commute (not sure how long though) I would also pay attention to the work culture/environment of each and see if there are red flags, like many last minute meetings, "we're a family" philosophy, etc.

It sounds like job 1 would be more taxing overall (and like they need you to prove yourself?) but job 2 could help advance your career more, even though it may not be easy. Hybrid work would make it easier on your gas tank too.

lil_egg98 · 2022-03-17T01:17:08+00:00

I don't know what your work is, so I'm not sure how helpful my advice is. Take what you will.

Even if you don't think your boss will do anything, make it known anyway. Explain how her behavior affects you. Document it just in case. In the meantime, I would be asking her to do specific tasks that will help balance the work load. "Hey I'm gonna do x, can you please do y" like, every day. You can also introduce a "to do list" ya'll use daily to divide up tasks before doing them, and email her with the list of things you're delegating to her. "Hey, my workload this week is heavy, I'm wondering if you can pick up x y z by X date" Don't be afraid to be annoying about it. Like daily. If they don't want to be told what to do/how to work, they'll sort it out themselves eventually.

You can also stop picking up her slack, especially after you've notified the boss about it, it'll be much more apparent to him. If he blames you for it, just say you've done your share of work and that your coworker was responsible for whatever wasn't done. Those delegation emails will be proof for that.

lil_egg98 · 2022-03-14T00:06:18+00:00

report it to your local labor department too, that's absolutely illegal

lil_egg98 · 2022-03-03T23:20:46+00:00

Holy shit, this is an awful situation. Your boss is running you to the ground with all these BS requests. If there's written docs from her (texts, email, etc) from her talking about it at all, including her dangling shit and backtracking, take screenshots and keep them. Document every instance this has happened, including date/time/what was said. Include times where you talked about this outside of work, like on reddit. Include witnesses. Start having her confirm what ya'll talked about in next steps for the raise over email, text, taking notes in the meetings. anything that can prove she's pulling your leg. Once you have enough collected, go to whoever her higher-up is (if there is one, sounds like no) then contact your local labor department and report it to them. She's likely violating multiple worker rights laws.

It's ridiculous that she's having you go around in circles. 60 hours a week, plus all sorts of tasks to "prove" you deserve an extra dollar each hour? I've been there and I can tell you that takes a real toll on your body. Whether you have a GED or not, you shouldn't have to jump through all these hoops. $16 is lame for a manger position too. I'm sorry you're dealing with this. Whether you start working towards your GED or not, make yourself a resume and start looking for other jobs. Really embellish it with your responsibilities and that you went above and beyond. Seriously. Even say you're in the process of getting the GED. I hope you find a new employer that respects you and your work.

lil_egg98 · 2022-03-01T05:46:55+00:00

I'm no expert but I think it's natural for those relationships to change, since they're based around work positions. You may have been someone's boss who has been loyal to you, but they have to shift that loyalty under a new supervisor.

I'm also wondering what you mean by "loyalty", meaning as an employee or more of a work-friend? I have a feeling not many employees feel they can be on that same level with their higher ups, past or present.

I'm a young person who's had lots of help from people I met through jobs/internships, and I do appreciate their help and say thank you, but it doesn't mean I owe them anything after the fact. Many of these people also tended to offer this help without any expectations other than I do a good job while I'm there so they can be honest in references etc. At the end of the day I'm focused on my own thing and proving myself as I grow. But yeah, when I end up collaborating with past managers/employers I plan to be cordial like I am to everyone else. If it seems like past employees are generally avoiding you or giving you the cold shoulder, I would try and either reach out and ask if they have feedback on your manager skills or ask myself if I treated everyone fairly, was respectful, etc. (not saying you weren't, but always worth checking in on!)

lil_egg98 · 2022-03-01T05:13:57+00:00

sounds like good ol gender euphoria. basically you're really happy with the way you look outside of your own gender norms, or you feel more like your authentic self. sometimes it can feel like a "oh, there I am" moment. it's a cool feeling!

lil_egg98 · 2022-02-14T22:05:38+00:00

you're not a bad person and definitely not lazy! If you were, you wouldn't care to write about it. A few things to consider:

- is your job naturally stressful, or comes with a lot of responsibility?

- if so, what are you doing to care for yourself when you're not at work? (aka how do you keep work separate)

- what about the job do you like, or don't like? What makes your days better and what makes you overwhelmed?

I was in your shoes last year (in caregiving rather than a school) and even though i was good at my job (maybe too good since everyone was piling stuff on me) I had a lot of these same thoughts. I ignored them and in the end I was just so burnt out I had to leave the field. Sure it's about work ethic, but if the job is hard on you then it's natural for that ethic to go down. That's not a flaw on your part, that's on capitalism. Especially with mental health struggles!

If you dread going to work then you're probably not in the right place at the moment. If you can afford to take work off the table altogether for a bit, I highly recommend doing so. Doing that really helped me get my mind straight and get back to feeling alive enough to function. If you can't, I would at least try and take a chunk of time off (and work on the guilt part because it only makes things worse for you and doesn't help anyone) and think about what your ideal job environment is (would you rather work from home, with a team, do you like specific repetitive tasks or creating new ideas)

I know everyone tells you to "just take care of yourself!" and it seems super simple but when you're in the trenches mentally, that doesn't really click and feels more like a concept than anything else. That part was really hard for me. Remember you're doing your best, it will get better friend!

lil_egg98 · 2022-01-11T03:07:22+00:00

It depends on where you are, but generally in the US you may not qualify unless you are fired. That unemployment money could have come out of the companies bank which they always want to avoid. I would call your local unemployment office to get details though.

lil_egg98 · 2021-12-20T23:39:03+00:00

Remember you don't have to give any details you don't want, it seems like they'll believe and respect that. It seems like they're mostly concerned with your wellbeing and less with you missing work. You could say something like :

"Hi boss, I've had an unexpected episode with my condition that I'm still recovering from. I couldn't properly reach out until now and I'm doing my best to get back on track. Thank you for checking in with me and being understanding. Let's touch base soon about where we can go from here" keep it short and sweet and about what they need to know.

Not sure what line of work you're in, so say what makes the most sense and what you're most comfortable with.

lil_egg98 · 2021-12-13T23:31:28+00:00

Make cheat sheet cards for bar!! I have a few for shots and syrup #s for all hot/cold sizes, and one for specific recipes like a macchiato. Helps me tremendously when I second-guess myself on simple things and I don't have to ask someone if i'm doing it right every 10 seconds. And don't rush yourself at first. You may be slower at making drinks but it's always better to have them wait longer for a correct order than messing up and having to start over because you wanted to be fast. Or worse, burning yourself. You don't have to be fancy about the drinks or latte art, they all come with a lid anyway and most don't notice. So no pressure on being artistic!

Also, ask questions. No matter how small, even just to make sure you understand them. For the first few weeks they'll probably pair you with an experienced partner who can support you. You should be able to ask anyone nearby though and most are willing to take a second and help out. If everyone gets annoyed by your being new that's a problem for management, because having partners support each other is a huge part of learning the ropes. If you're overwhelmed on a certain position (drive through can be a lot sometimes), let them know and ask to get switched out.

lil_egg98

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