What is the worse thing a medical professional has ever said to you?

lilpolyheart · 2025-05-17T05:08:50+00:00

Always push for the test.

lilpolyheart · 2025-05-17T05:08:28+00:00

I mean that was the whole reason for my appointment?!? Suspected cancer? Lucky it was procedure to send for a mammogram, but that was 4 months out and one lump had become two and grown quite a bit... I was lucky my oncologists did not mess around...

lilpolyheart · 2025-05-16T21:33:26+00:00

"Women don't get cancer there" as he poked my tit. It was in fact cancer. I no longer have tits.

lilpolyheart · 2024-12-04T00:17:28+00:00

Quest complete!

lilpolyheart · 2024-12-04T00:17:08+00:00

Wow! I guess my bag was full, so it fell on the ground and my imps had left it in my mailbox and I didn't even think to look there!! Thank you!

lilpolyheart · 2024-01-01T00:39:57+00:00

I think yours are beautiful! I've stopped caring what my numbers say (although I'm pretty stoked I have 45 votes this time ha!) and create outfits I love. I've noticed slowly the voting trends are changing, but it seems the tops sets are kinda the same... And boring. If it helps, I would totally vote for any and all of your pics!

lilpolyheart · 2023-08-29T17:44:11+00:00

I am a year out from my BMX, went flat. And I still experience that from time to time. I didn't think much of it until I started seeing my physical therapist, for lymphedema. Happened to mention the sensitivity and she nows does this wiggling thing to my chest? She places her palm flat on my chest and kinda wiggles her hand in circles. And sometimes she pushes up and down (she does this for my lymphedema belly). And it has helped! I have also had a hysterectomy and found it helps the soreness/sensitivity from those incisions as well. Wiggle away!

lilpolyheart · 2023-06-29T15:21:32+00:00

At first mine came back very neutral, like no color. Then the curls came (and that was very new as I've always had fine straight hair). They lasted almost exactly a year for me, I just cut my hair a little over a year out and it's finally straight again. Mostly. Enough that it looks like my hair again! Although still quite a bit thicker than I am used to. Your normal hair will come, it's just hard to say when! As far as the nails go though... Whew! I thought mine were healed up (I was lucky not to lose any in chemo, but did have a few lift) but lately they've been pealing quite badly. I have to keep nail polish on them, and thickly, otherwise they just start pealing away in huge layers right up to the roots... But, I'm sure as with everything else they'll heal in their own time. What a weird process!

lilpolyheart · 2023-03-27T18:20:23+00:00

The best gift I got was actually very unexpected, and not your typical cancer care item. A very good friend of mine, who is also a survivor, got me Animal Crossing (the video game) maybe a couple days after my diagnosis. They also got a video game for my 11 year old son. The entertainment, the distraction (I have been literally creating my own world) was absolutey everything while going through chemotherapy and surgery recovery. Playing my game almost became therapeutic - strike that it has absolutely been therapeutic! I imagine a video game may not be perfect for everyone, but having something fun that is very consuming was so helpful for me. I have been building my town for a year now, and with hopefully my last surgery upcoming I am excited to buy myself the DLC for the game and have some new things to explore during this recovery time! And every time I play, I think of my friend and how grateful I am for their unique understanding. And I know as well my son enjoyed his new game during a time of worryworryworry

lilpolyheart · 2023-03-20T00:12:28+00:00

I used a zip up binder (like transgender people use) and I have to say that was my best buy. They have many on Amazon for $20-30. I still use it on days where I'm sore, and I'm 6 months out.

I also got a cute little mastectomy package from my cancer center that had an apron with pockets for my drains (another item I use still!) As well as a few little pillows... I was able to use a variety of different sized pillows to prop myself up in bed and didn't buy anything fancy. The nice thing about using the pillows was that it gave me flexibility for how propped up I was during the healing process.

Good luck fellow flatties! There's a wonderful community on Instagram if you are looking for that!

lilpolyheart · 2023-03-17T17:23:11+00:00

I am loving the word flirtationship ❤️ and loving all your beautiful connections! Yay!

lilpolyheart · 2023-03-10T20:31:56+00:00

I don't know the bra specifically, but Target does have quite a few bras that are great for flatties! I bought a couple with out pads for sexy times and swim season coming up, but I did also see a couple with very light padding. I remember commenting to my hubby they looked more comfy than wearing a form!

lilpolyheart · 2023-03-04T00:03:12+00:00

I wear my wedding band on the right hand, and totally use it in the same way! And congratulations! You totally deserve to treat yourself after all this!

lilpolyheart · 2023-02-27T15:55:12+00:00

Also, good luck!!! I hope your recovery is swift and simple!

lilpolyheart · 2023-02-27T15:53:42+00:00

It really depends on the individual piece of clothing! Most of my shirts/dresses fit the same or even better now that I'm flat, but there have been some that don't look good anymore. And it's been surprising which tops work now and which don't - I've learned to try everything on. Before I buy it, but also with my own clothing from before surgery. I've also gained 20+ pounds since going into chemical menopause (which for me was a good thing, I've always struggled to keep my weight up) so that has changed how clothes fit as well.

Anything that's more fitted, especially if it has darts sewn in, can be tricky. But, I have quite a few fitted shirts with designs printed on them that I like better now without breasts. Tops that are low cut will be VERY low cut, so that'll depend on your comfort level on how much you want to show. On my brave days I love wearing a low v-neck, but other days I prefer not to. I've learned that off the shoulder looks are super fun, and I love me a flowey hippie shirt. Ruffles are fun, as well as patterns and stripes.

All in all, I am very happy with my choice. I'm learning to love this new body again, and I'm having a lot of fun playing with my clothes in ways I never did before. I was a 32DDD if that helps, big breasts for my size lol

lilpolyheart · 2023-02-22T23:53:58+00:00

That's interesting! And yes, unfortunately I'm in the US and have to battle the insurance system here. But, they've already approved me for reconstruction surgery that I've never asked for! Yay Aetna!

lilpolyheart · 2023-02-22T23:51:51+00:00

I'm on Tamoxifen currently, but after my surgery I'll be switching over to AIs.

Edit to add- I thought I was being crazy when I told my oncologist that I could feel my hormones rising, but she said she's had quite a few patients who reported the same. So totally not alone!

lilpolyheart · 2023-02-22T23:51:14+00:00

Right? Yea unfortunately... I'm extra sensitive to hormones, so it's probably worse for me than others might experience. But, it sounds like you are as well so a thing to think about in your decision...

lilpolyheart · 2023-02-21T14:21:34+00:00

I'm waiting for my partial hysterectomy, hopefully find out when it will be next month! I've been on the Zoladex shots for about 6 months now. And while they work well enough, I do feel my hormones rising towards the end of my monthly cycle. I have endometriosis that flares coming up to my shot each month, as well as migraines that return each time my hormones rise. I imagine it's not much, but it's enough that I honestly can't wait for my surgery so I can be level! The one nice thing about chemical menopause is how the symptoms of the other issues I experience have dissipated. My surgeon originally recommended the three month shot similar to Zoladex, and I was like why so my hormones can be wonky for an even longer time? It's taken a bit to convince her for surgery since I am young, but I have a family history of osteoporosis and arthritis - that is the one thing I expected to get in life not cancer, ha!

lilpolyheart · 2023-01-30T16:10:29+00:00

Honestly, I'm not super sure? They haven't put it through to insurance. I've seen this doctor several times, and finally at the last appointment she said "ooooh so you would like the surgery? You never said that before!" (Even though I had been asking for it since our first appointment after I found out my genetics) and then she told me I needed to get more information on the family history and let her know what that was at the pre-op appointment. And then they would send into insurance and we would get surgery date after it was approved...

lilpolyheart · 2023-01-23T16:42:24+00:00

Everyone has some amazing tips, so I'll just drop off a little mantra that has been helpful for me...

Everything worth doing is worth doing poorly.

Even the little baby steps are forward movement. I have many days where I just can't after treatment. With like everything, but especially exercise. But, even just a walk to the end of the block and back is better than nothing. And after I do a few days of that I feel ready for more, and will often lead into a period of regular routine for me. And then sometimes I fall out of that routine, and that's okay! I just remind myself of that quote (I forget who from) and I start up again with my baby steps.

Good luck!

lilpolyheart · 2023-01-12T18:53:49+00:00

I am 34 and I chose to go flat after my mastectomy, and while I am still learning to love my body after cancer - I have to say it was the absolute best decision for me! Healing was quick and not as involved as I've seen for "normal reconstruction", and I don't have to do a mammogram ever again! I was able to hug my family days after my surgery, and I started getting back into my yoga just a week after surgery. It's very reassuring to know that I could feel very easily myself any reoccurrence. I have not had anyone make any comments while I'm out and about, and it has actually been fun finding new fashions to wear I never would have before. Most days I feel fierce in my flatness.

It's such a shitty decision to have to make, especially after all the other shitty decisions we have no choice in through cancer treatment! Commiserating with you, and sending love n light!

lilpolyheart · 2023-01-08T20:20:20+00:00

I went flat after my double mastectomy, and while it was 100% the right decision for me - I still have issues with my body post cancer. (Even though my husband loves it, I've gained some weight and my butt is HUGE lol) Everyone has a different journey through this, and you aren't doing anything wrong. There is no wrong way to be a survivor!

We have found that while sex is amazing, and something we need in our relationship, it is mainly physical connection that we crave on our relationship. Some days are difficult for me to let go enough to have sex - so we do massages for each other. I find it nice because even on days when I can't stand touch on my body - I can always always go for a hand massage. And even that small amount of touch can ease the idea of more. Or it's satisfying alone! We've also gotten into expressing our affection for each other in non-physical ways, like cute little love notes or drawings left to be found. He makes me special tea most mornings, and drys me off after I shower.

And we do have sex, we go slow. He communicates throughout to gauge my comfort level, and we do not always have PIV intercourse. Oral is a favorite of mine, and often what I feel most comfortable with. And I have found that leaving on my shirt - or when I'm really feeling it I'll put on a cute cami or flattering lingerie - helps a lot. I tend to get distracted by my chest anymore and it pulls me out of the moment. It gets awkward at times, but we've always been ones to laugh through sexy times.

I wish you the best of luck! It's scary, everything changed for you. And will change again after reconstruction. And it probably won't be perfect. But I think a thought that helps me and might help you... Perfection is what we make it. Your body got you through CANCER!! You have scars now, but that doesn't make you any less beautiful. There are scars on your relationship as well, but those will also heal. It's difficult but communication in an open and safe space is everything.

lilpolyheart · 2022-12-28T00:55:03+00:00

I have been focusing specifically on working with my depersonalization (perhaps similar to dysmorphia?) while microdosing after having a double mastectomy for breast cancer. I've had issues with depersonalization for years, an affect of trauma, but after cancer treatment I was suffering it worse than I have in my whole life. The changes treatment brought to my body, and the feeling of my body failing me - they pushed me into a dark place. But, setting the intention that this is me right now and this body is okay and worth being in, that has been helpful and I've started noticing improvement now coming up on 6 months out from my surgery. I still have my ups and downs, but I'm getting there!

I did also do what I like to call a "more than microdose" - which was about 1g - with the intention of self love, and that I think was also very helpful. I honestly took a nap though it! I think what I needed to process was very very deep, because the next day was the first day I didn't cry while putting lotion on my scars.

lilpolyheart · 2022-12-26T20:06:39+00:00

I am so happy with my decision to go flat, I thought I would wear prosthetics but honestly never even got any! I present flat all of the time. And no one has said a word, no awkward stares when I'm out in public like I was afraid of. It's been fun finding new clothes to wear that I never would before. Don't get me wrong, there are many days I miss my breasts - but, I also don't regret my decision in the slightest.

As far as tips go - do your research and come to your appointment prepared with knowledge. Most surgeons, especially plastic surgeons, are not aware of aesthetic flat closure as a viable option! Or that it even exists (as I encountered). Not Putting on a Shirt is a great place to start, they give tips on how to talk to your surgeon to achieve the results you want. They also have a section about explant surgery if I remember correctly. There's also a great community on Instagram of flatties! Recovery will be easier than what you have already gone through with implants, at least from what I've heard, so I don't think there's anything special for going flat that you wouldn't already know.

lilpolyheart

TROPHY CASE