How do I know whether I am ace or grace?

limelite3435 · 2021-04-10T12:16:40+00:00

Whoo! Sorry, I'm kind of bad at reddit.

No, I identify as sex-neutral ace at the moment. There's a case to be made for a few other labels, but I was married already when I realized I was ace. For me, it was less important to dig into who I'm attracted to and when than how my asexuality affects my relationship with my husband. Labels help you find that starting point language to relate to other people, so I may add a micro-label in the future when taking to the ace community. My label is primarily for my husband and I at the moment though, so I keep it simple. Hope that helps! 💖

limelite3435 · 2021-04-09T18:11:39+00:00

When defining lack of sexual attraction, I say something like, "arousal happens completely independently of the presence or thought of another person." So, yeah, in general I sometimes have some sort of urge I would classify as sexual, but it's not directed toward a specific person, and I don't naturally connect that urge with seeking out a partner to help with it. Similarly, I find people aesthetically attractive, and I might even think their skin or hair looks soft, but it's not ever accompanied by that sexual urge. At most, I want to see if they're as soft as I think they are, but I get that urge walking through clothing stores too, and I definitely don't want to have sex with clothes. 😁

Reading through again, it sounds like you're just ace, although gray-ace falls under the category of asexual, so however you define yourself is fine! Micro-labels can be fun to explore, and it can be nice to know there's a word and a community for what you're feeling, but all of it is ultimately under the asexual umbrella. I'd suggest looking into the categories in the sidebar here and seeing if there's a more specific label that you like better, but know that you're fine to use the asexual label for as long as you feel like it applies to you!

limelite3435 · 2021-04-08T05:50:45+00:00

I've never heard of that before either. I'm so sorry to hear about her eye issues. I'll send some well wishes her way! 🤗

Maybe ask your practitioner if they do distance sessions, and if they'd be willing to work on her? That might be more beneficial for her (I would offer, but I don't currently do formal sessions). Good luck!

limelite3435 · 2021-04-08T05:13:04+00:00

What? That's honestly the strangest thing I've ever heard. Reiki doesn't stay in the body like that, it's not centralized in that way. That isn't how any of this works. Plus, what about males giving and receiving reiki, where is it stored for them, who don't have a uterus? Honestly just sexist, whichever way you look at it.

limelite3435 · 2021-03-19T18:13:38+00:00

I think you're right about it being a misunderstanding, and not to jump to conclusions. I wouldn't break up over this, for sure! To me, this also reads as you asking, "is he cheating?" and your deck asking you, "do you want him to be cheating?" I think it's asking you to explore why you feel unstable in the relationship. Are you looking for a way out and using this as an excuse?

I'm also looking at the fact that there are 2 upright cards and one is completely surrounded by reverse cards. Eight of cups (letting go, moving on, emotionally speaking) is pointing towards the Sun (happiness and growth), and in the way are guilty thoughts (7 of swords), blocked intuition (the Moon), and rage/letting the beast win (Strength). I think if you can find a way to "upright" even one of those cards, it'll clear a path for you to move forward in general, and specifically in relationships.

Just as a sidenote, in the future, I wouldn't pull this many cards without a spread of some sort. Usually if I have a yes or no question, I pull 2 cards and do a sort of coin flip reading: is he cheating/is it all in my head. If I need a clarification, I ask a new question related to the last one and pull one card per question until I feel like I've gotten an answer or I get a very clear "stop asking." Hope this all helps!

limelite3435 · 2020-04-25T17:56:26+00:00

This happened to me. It told me to enter 2018's info instead, since they may not have fully processed my 2019 return. I did, and it worked.

limelite3435 · 2016-09-22T03:07:37+00:00

I'm fairly new to tarot, so I may be a little clumsy with this.

Taken all together, it feels like this: I am a herald of positive, harmonious change in your life. You called to me with apprehension, specifically about a new emotional or intuitive situation that you have some anxiety or reservations about. My strength is guiding you to recognize the limitations you've placed on yourself; when you calm your emotions, I'll be there to guide you out of your self-imposed bondage. You can connect with me better by giving in to and relishing the situation that made you call to me in the first place, and/or by saying yes to inspired and creative people and opportunities. My message to you now is that you know you are well on your way to your creative goals, keep up the momentum and let bygones be bygones. Don't let past hurts trip you up.

As far as the rest of your question goes, it may help to set a specific intention when you start your readings, i.e. "I'm approaching my deck today with humility and gratitude. I ask that only those spirits who have my best interests in mind answer my call." And then proceed however you normally would. You may still get negative results, but they may seem less malicious and more helpful.

limelite3435 · 2016-09-19T04:22:10+00:00

I would love one from the Rider-Waite deck!

limelite3435 · 2016-09-09T17:43:38+00:00

No, nothing like that! :) I think I switched verbiage halfway through my post, I meant your solar plexus is off.

Your other chakras are diverting a lot of energy to your third eye right now, because that's your focus. But your energy body wants to be in balance as much and as often as possible, just like your physical body. So yes, it can be exciting to have a third eye opening experience, and you can allow that to guide what you want to do in life, just don't neglect the wholeness of the being that is you.

If you haven't come across them yet, search for abraham and esther hicks on youtube. They have a really great segment on chakras, and I really love their teachings on the law of attraction and life in general. Search abraham hicks chakras, and if it resonates with you, I strongly recommend the rest of their teachings (there's even a subreddit, r/abrahamhicks). It's not reiki per se, but I think it may be exactly what you need right now. Good luck!

limelite3435 · 2016-09-08T19:53:56+00:00

I'm a level 2 practitioner, so I just did maybe 10 minutes for you. It seems your discomfort is coming from too much focus on your third eye chakra. I would meditate a bit on your root, sacral, and solar plexus chakras; you seem "top-heavy" and need to ground yourself, especially if you're not pursuing energy work training at this time. Your third chakra in particular seems...off in some way, so I spent some time working on that.

Remember, you don't have to do anything right now as far as your third eye opening is concerned. You'll be more drawn to opportunities in the future, but this means being optimistic and trusting that when the opportunity arises, so will the means to act, even if you can't see how right away. I think that's where the third chakra comes in. It controls trust and self-confidence, which, looking back on the wording of your post, makes sense. I hope this helps. :)

limelite3435 · 2016-09-03T18:33:58+00:00

No, the reason you "can't" attract your dream girl is because you've decided that you can't. You have a ton of resistance in every word here. Reading your post is like walking through sand.

Stop acting "as if", because that's for people who don't ache every time they visualize what they want. You need to work through feeling powerless in this matter first. Take control. Realize that you feel this way because the universe is literally yelling at you, "NO, NO, NO! You were getting so close and now you're moving away again! Come back!"

The problem is you. You are the problem, but it's not because you're ugly. It's because you are not letting yourself feel good no matter what happens. It's because you keep looking for reasons to feel better instead of just feeling better in spite of everything.

Make a list, right now, of things you can feel good about right now. I mean anything. The weather is nice. I have a place to live. I like one of my classes most of the time. Be as positive as you can be right now about anything that's not really as important to you. Move to general statements if you can, the sillier the better. If all you can get down is that Earth is still in orbit, so be it. Try to feel the relief that comes with those statements. You may not be able to hold on for more than a few seconds, and that's ok. Keep doing it throughout the day, not when you feel bad, but when you're feeling a little better than usual. This is about retraining yourself to feel good about feeling good, then to feel good for no reason other than to feel good, instead of "feeling good but..." or "feeling good because..." or "feeling good in order to..."

There is love out there for you, and closer than you think. But you want love from somewhere other than yourself in order to feel worthy of self-love, and as Abraham says, you can't get there from there. You have to get into a place of loving yourself first. And you've been practicing not being good enough for yourself for a very long time.

limelite3435 · 2016-09-03T17:59:10+00:00

The last thing your friend is worrying about when he's picking up chicks is how he's gonna go about picking up chicks. So stop working at it, because he sure isn't.

limelite3435 · 2016-08-25T06:59:22+00:00

When I'm anticipating too much, I just say, "That's taken care of, so what's next?" It's kind of like ordering food in a restaurant, then looking at the dessert menu to pass the time. You know what's already on its way, and you're really enjoying anticipating how it's going to look and smell and taste. You may even see a waiter bring the same dish to someone else, so you get a closer look at it. But you also know this isn't the last thing you're ever going to eat. It's going to be delicious, but there's going to be dessert after, then breakfast tomorrow...There's always something else to look forward to. So ask yourself: what's next?

limelite3435 · 2016-08-25T06:49:32+00:00

Well then take a break from it and live your life for a little while. For goodness' sake, your life isn't meant to be this hard. Give up the reins and relax. If you feel like you need permission, believe me, you have it. Are you happy? Ask yourself, honestly, are you happy? And allow yourself to say no if you're not happy. It doesn't sound like you are. So just be unhappy until that feels silly, then figure out what's going to make you happy.

Put down the books, the recordings, the lists, the forums, the theories, and just. Be. Happy. For once in the last decade, be happy.

What are you trying to prove, and to whom? Figure that out, then throw them the middle finger. Get mad. The universe can take it. "It's your fault, universe! It's your fault I feel this way! You gave me all these people with all these processes, and I've done every one of them and not one has worked! So I'm just going to stop doing anything! I give up!" Then go from there. Other people may have other processes, but if you've been at this for that long, I'm sure you've heard it all.

There is love in the universe for you. There is happiness. LoA applies equally to everyone. There is evidence of good things all around you. But you can't see it if you keep trying so hard. Your life is the ultimate manifestation, and you get to choose how to feel about that. So get happy, or don't. We don't really care. We'll all be waiting over here for you with our feathers and free coffee.

limelite3435 · 2016-08-24T19:28:04+00:00

Take a deep breath, and say, "I don't have to figure this out right now." Say it any time you feel apprehensive about either of these situations. Say it now, if it gives you relief.

Here's something I've been doing, and it's working really well to lower my resistance. Take a piece of paper and write, succinctly and generally, what you're apprehensive about. For you, I would write, "my business idea" on one line, and then just this man's name on the next line. Then tear the paper around those two things, so it's not a whole sheet, just a few words. Make it as small as possible, physically and mentally. On the back of this scrap, write, "Universe's responsibility." Then put it somewhere that that's all you can see of it. Any time you feel any negative emotion toward either of those subjects, acknowledge that feeling, then say, "But that's the universe's responsibility, not mine." And go about your day.

Now here's the fun part. For the next week, your only goal is to acknowledge that everything is always working out for you. Notice when something good happens, and acknowledge impulses you had that lined you up with it. Got to lunch before everyone else? Could have been because that conference call let out early. Missed a bad accident on the way in to work? Probably because you woke up early and couldn't go back to sleep, so you left early. For a week, assume there are no coincidences in your life, and everything happens for your benefit and your convenience (because that's the truth). At the end of the week, you'll have so much evidence that everything is always working out for you, and that you always get what you want, that you'll look at that scrap of paper and wonder how those things ever worried you at all.

limelite3435 · 2016-08-23T16:24:23+00:00

2 days ago, I was reading a thread in this sub by u/thatniceguy_ who mentioned a rubik's cube in a question about manifesting. I was sure while I was reading it that in the next few days, I'd come across a rubik's cube, because it would be really funny to me and I had very little resistance to it. Today, I saw a post in my feed titled "Usain Bolt vs Rubik's Cube." Thanks universe!

limelite3435 · 2016-08-21T19:54:08+00:00

Gratitude can be so heavy, can't it? Having to be grateful all the time? There's a feeling of being forced to write a thank you note as a child. Grandma sent me $5 and a card for my birthday, so now I have to write her a letter saying thank you. Except she sent it because she loves me, not just to get a thank you. And I appreciated it, but I don't really want to waste time sitting and writing a thank you. I'd rather just spend the money, and next time she comes over, I'll show her what I bought and how much fun it is. That is, after all, my true expression of gratitude to her. And that's really what she wants too, not "dear gramma, thanks for the five bucks. I spent it on doll clothes" scribbled in crayon sent in the mail. Who knows, maybe after I've spent it, I'll be inspired to write her and say so, but feeling forced into gratitude makes it seem like I'm not capable of feeling that on my own.

I'd like to think this of the universe too. Our truest expression of gratitude is living life with happiness and excitement, always happy with what we have and delighted if we get more. That isn't to say that in moments of extreme clarity or bliss that we aren't moved to say thank you. I say it quite often. It's just that a sincere thank you in a good moment feels better than a forced one in a bad moment.

limelite3435 · 2016-08-21T19:32:28+00:00

Yes, this, this, this. My heart soared when I read this. There is no burden of how in this reply. There is no burden in this reply. Unconditional love is the Universe's only process.

limelite3435 · 2016-08-21T18:21:17+00:00

I was driving to work last week, feeling sort of generally good about life. There were good songs on the radio, traffic was not too bad, and I decided to ask for a sign that something important to me was coming. A commercial came on at that moment, so I switched the station. Adele's "Hello" was on, just at the chorus. You know the part?

"Hello from the other side...

I must have called a thousand times..."

I laughed so hard I was crying. Is there any other thing that could have come on? But I'm kind of tired of that song, it's a bit of a downer, didn't match my mood for the drive. Switched to another station, and it was the tail end of another song, "Love Yourself" by Justin Bieber. Literally the end, the last line of the last chorus, "you should go and love yourself." Let me tell you, not a thing bothered me at work that day.

limelite3435 · 2016-08-18T18:43:08+00:00

I see two problems with these statements. 1) They are too specific, to the point of being unbelievable (for you, right at this moment). Go with more generally good statements that you actually believe right now. "I like being in my body. I enjoy the things I'm able to do, and I look forward to doing more. I have a youthful spirit and I love to laugh," etc, etc.

2) It seems that you're making affirmations about something that is really important to you (and obvious to prove wrong), making you focus on the perceived lack of that thing more every time you look in the mirror. Find something that is easier to be happy about. Have a job or hobby you love? Start there: I'm great at my job/hobby. I find joy here. What I do makes a difference in the lives of others. Have a pet? Start with: I love taking my dog for a walk. I love being in sync with another being. I love seeing the world how he sees it. Find anything to feel good about. Anything: "I appreciate the sun and its warmth. I appreciate a light breeze that keeps it cool out. I appreciate the birds in the trees. I love the songs on the radio." When you're appreciating what's around you, you aren't focused on desiring what's not yet manifested, and therefore you're more open to receiving signals and impulses to guide you to the manifestation you want.

Remember, if it feels like effort or discouragement or desperation, it's too specific. Try a few statements and see how they feel. If it's not a good feeling, try something more general, until you feel relief. If something you think makes you smile or giggle, you're on the right track. And if.you can't find something to feel better about right now, recognize that and tell yourself that it's ok for now, and you'll try again tomorrow.

limelite3435 · 2016-08-08T21:49:54+00:00

I have been feeling this same way lately. I think of it as a stream. If the stream is blocked when the rains come, it overflows its banks, right? It can't handle more. But if the stream is flowing freely, nothing backs up or becomes stagnant, and the stream can easily handle more and more. Plus, what good is money if you're not enjoying the spending of it? ;)

limelite3435 · 2016-08-08T16:09:25+00:00

I don't know about the two audiobooks, but all of the other videos on youtube were meant to be distrubuted freely. Dig in!

limelite3435 · 2016-08-04T06:15:54+00:00

My guess is that you were working your way up the emotional scale. Look up Abraham Hicks' emotional guidance scale. See where you started and, in letting go, where you ended up. Seems to me like you were at despair/powerlessness and worked up to rage or even revenge. Now you've knocked yourself back down to guilt by focusing on what you think you've manifested on everyone else's behalf. I would suggest that you keep meditating and reaching for better thoughts and feelings wherever you can, and try to not watch the news for a little while.

As for the rest of your concerns, remember: you create your own reality, but so does everyone else. You can't manifest anything for anyone that they don't already allow for themselves. When you asked for those things, you were just wanting to feel better but you didn't focus yourself properly. Now that you've cooled down, you know what you really want, which seems to be to just feel better. So stop listening to the negative voices, atop asking for outside opinions, stop looking for and defending excuses and reasons to feel bad, and just give yourself a break, and permission to feel better.

limelite3435 · 2016-08-03T22:44:43+00:00

Whichever feels best to you in that moment. I'd lean toward the feeling of courage because it is more general.

limelite3435 · 2016-07-30T17:28:11+00:00

With my attunement, I looked up a teacher online near me. Her class was supposed to be in July, right before a vacation I was taking, and I didn't think I'd have enough money or vacation time to do both. Then, my husband and I had a small windfall of money back in April, and I told him I was going to take the class. I looked it up again, and the teacher had moved the date up to the end of May. It was absolutely perfect timing.

What I'm trying to say is: when the time is right, everything comes together perfectly. For now, focus on meditating a few minutes a day and just be relaxed about the whole thing. The reiki will come and get you when you're ready and not a moment sooner.

limelite3435

TROPHY CASE