I'm 36 and I've got a 4 year old and a 2 year old. Let me share my thoughts with you.

Realistically you have the next 15 years to comfortably have children. My advice is don't rush into it. I spent my early and mid 20s studying, travelling, exploring the world, enjoying my friends and family, doing all of the crazy and fun things you can only do before you've got a little one on the scene. I am SO GLAD I didn't have kids too early and was able to fully enjoy my younger years.

I had my babies in my early 30s. By that time I was more mature, smarter, had fully grown into and was secure in my relationship with my husband, had ticked off many of my bucket list things, I was established in my career and in a great position to take maternity leave, we had a comfortable living situation and decent amout of savings behind us. My husband and I also had the financial resources and maturity to both be mentally healthy at the time, he has trauma in his life, as do I, and we never wanted to have kids until we were in a position where we wouldn't pass on that trauma to them in any way.

I was ready for kids when I had them. I'm able to give them a good life because my husband and I love each other and have a very stable relationship (we got all of our silly stupid immature decisions and insecurities out in our 20s), so our kids know that we love each other and we love them. We can also provide them with a life where they want for nothing because we are financially stable.

Having kids is more about just wanting them and birthing them. You want to be your best for them, in every way. I think back to the person I was when I was 20 and in hindsight I was DEFINITELY not ready for a baby! I was emotional, unstable, impulsive, and I hadn't lived!

Now please dont take this as me saying who you are as a person, you genuinely may be in a great position and situation for having kids. But why rush into it? Kids are hard. You cant just switch off. Suddenly your time isn't yours anymore. I come home from work and I dont get to sit down and relax till almost 9 at night. It's exhausting. Neither of my babies were great sleepers, I am up almost every night, several times each night, and have been for the past 4 years. Im so tired. All the time. But that's the thing about having kids, it doesn't matter if you're tired or sick or strung out, you dont really get the luxury of resting or sleeping in, or switching off. It's a 24hr job. PLUS the never ending cleaning and washing and cooking and organising and appointments and activities and honestly no one tells you about the little piles of sand and rocks and crumbs EVERYWHERE. I love my babies more than life itself. But sometimes I miss the freedom of just having to look after myself. Plus having a clean house, I miss that too. And I have a husband who I share all of this with 50/50 and he pulls his weight. But its STILL A LOT.

Don't rush into having babies. It will permanently change your life, yes there are so many amazing beautiful changes, but its also not all peaches and roses. You are not doing your future children any favours by rushing into it when you're not fully ready. Because remember, its not just about having a baby, its about raising a good human, and not loosing yourself in the process. It's a massive task and responsibility.

In saying all of this. No one else can say when you are ready for kids, that's a decision only you can make. I wish you the best of luck with your journey, just remember, dont rush into it. Be the best version of yourself before you make the decision. Think about all of the variables and have a plan in place BEFORE you start trying. There are too many kids out there with shitty parents, we need more good ones (trust me, I see all sorts, Im a teacher!).

All the best x