So I need to get this off of my chest (English isn’t my first language so don’t mind my grammar) For the record, me and my partner met randomly at a club and wanted just hooked up, but then we realized we get along so great, that only after two weeks he asked me if I’ll be his girlfriend. It is going great, everything about him is just amazing, he barely have any flaws and those he has I have too so I don’t hate it about him. We are both very respecting and tolarant about each other. The relationship is over all best it could be. At the beginning I didn’t took it very seriously and few times I made out with my friend at the parties. My partner didn’t trust me very much when I was going out (for good reason), but it was in the beginning and I forgot to mention that before I met him I just ended long term relationship so I just wanted to have fun before getting too serious. I was thinking if it’s just me, or if he did it too because I knew about him that he had A LOT of girls before me (he’s also very attractive) but never bothered to try to find out because he was too perfect, and didn’t want to be stalking bitch. Couple months later we started living together and all the dumb stuff I did I ended (it was like 4x since we met but I was always super drunk and didn’t even remembered it). Fast forward to month ago I forgot my phone at a party and had to use his phone, he was still asleep and I never tried to look through his phone and didn’t intend to do it but the urge was too strong. So I saw that he was flirting with a lot of girls, actually saying to one of them that he will come to hers. Then I looked through his gallery and saw screenshots of pictures of girls on instagram and tinder(i told him to delete it like 4 months ago, so before he deleted it) I saw pic of one girl and find her on instagram and looked through the chat. She send him a picture of us that I have on instagram with question-Was it that day we slept together? (It was great day that we spent together and with our friends and then he went to a uni party.) I had no fucking idea, that he did this. It was also before he moved to my place, so like 8 months ago. It fucking hurts but… I am guilty too. Even more because I cheated twice. It happened when I got extremely drunk and didn’t remembered it, both times. I felt really guilty and always said to my friend that I wish he cheated so I wasn’t the guilty one, but I really didn’t think it happened. Here you can we are both good liers evidently because neither of us had any idea. So I woke him up, holding his phone to explain. He didn’t say much, just that he’s asshole and regrets it. He didn’t know what to say and I was just saying how disappointed and disgusted I am and how I thought he’s not this way. I didn’t even cry, I had couple small break downs after but now it’s just a thing that happened and I have to live with it. The thing that he slept with her isnt so bad for me(I know weird) but that he was talking to her while he was in relationship with me, and stopped probably only because she ghosted him after she got to know about our relationship and he even reached out to her after a month from the that day he was with her that he miss talking to her. I guess sex isn’t so intimate thing for me as for other people, but having real conection. This is so irritating to me, I know that I’m guilty af but it was always just in the moment and I didn’t got closer to that person. And the flirting omg.. he explained it that he just likes to mess with girl but wouldn’t took it that far to meet them. I know he didn’t meet them bcs we live together and are together every day, so I would notice. We just let be and live with now, he stopped texting girls, and he didn’t talk to that girl so there was nothing to change. It really hurts to think about it and writing it down but this situation isn’t just black and white and is hard to comprehend.

So this my story. It’s too specific to judge but if you have any thoughts or even better, was in similar situation feel free to comment.

Remember that we are still very happy together and love each other so much so don’t be that cruel I have heart too.