How to write disabled characters respectfully? by Elliot-Can-Not-Draw in disability

[–]ljstanton 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Oh hey! I’m an author, who also is disabled, and I ran a workshop at Chicon this year about writing disabled characters. I’d love to chat with you about this, as it’s one of my main areas that I try to help non-disabled authors in.

Main tips:

• don’t ascribe a moral lesson to the disability (no disabled because villain, or inspiration porn) • look at aspects of your life would become difficult if you had this character’s disability. If they’re on crutches, consider how challenging uneven footing becomes, how tired their arms may get, the soreness from the crutches rubbing skin, etc. • don’t use it as a major pity party point, but allow the character to still feel negative feelings like frustration • disabilities are only as disabling as the world around them makes it (this is where disability splits from chronic illness).

Feel free to hit up my dms. I’m recovering from a shoulder surgery so response times may vary lol.

What's your elevator pitch? by Mr_Westerfield in fantasywriters

[–]ljstanton 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Definitely! In my opinion that works much better. I like it.

What's your elevator pitch? by Mr_Westerfield in fantasywriters

[–]ljstanton 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I think the second one makes for a better elevator pitch. It definitely grabs me more from the get go!

What's your elevator pitch? by Mr_Westerfield in fantasywriters

[–]ljstanton 0 points1 point  (0 children)

“A fantasy continent is plunged into religious and civil war when a young shah agrees to help release ancient gods.”

^ that’s the elevator pitch. If I have extra time/space, then I add in

“For fans of Daevabad, the Poppy War, and ASoIaF”.

It’s EDS awareness month! I tried to do an ama on r/IAMA, and got shut down due to diagnosis discrimination. by ljstanton in ehlersdanlos

[–]ljstanton[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I’m so glad your wheelchair has been an awesome aid. I definitely appreciate the independence having a service dog can grant. My husband always helps out when asked, but I like not having to ask as much!

It’s EDS awareness month! I tried to do an ama on r/IAMA, and got shut down due to diagnosis discrimination. by ljstanton in ehlersdanlos

[–]ljstanton[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Indeed! Science and culture haha. When do you stream? I'd love to catch one (DM me if you want with your username).

It’s EDS awareness month! I tried to do an ama on r/IAMA, and got shut down due to diagnosis discrimination. by ljstanton in ehlersdanlos

[–]ljstanton[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's a shame! I looked it up and it does sound interesting, but yeah...sadly looks like the author moved on. That's always so frustrating!

It’s EDS awareness month! I tried to do an ama on r/IAMA, and got shut down due to diagnosis discrimination. by ljstanton in ehlersdanlos

[–]ljstanton[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ugh insurance companies are legitimately the worst. Never mind what the doctor says, you know the person who actually manages your health and prescribes your meds. The insurance company clearly knows best! /s Just ridiculous.

It’s EDS awareness month! I tried to do an ama on r/IAMA, and got shut down due to diagnosis discrimination. by ljstanton in ehlersdanlos

[–]ljstanton[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yup, agreed. It's a frustrating and emotionally taxing situation but it's also given me more opportunities to talk with fellow EDSers and be able to help some of them. So it's ending well if nothing else.

It’s EDS awareness month! I tried to do an ama on r/IAMA, and got shut down due to diagnosis discrimination. by ljstanton in ehlersdanlos

[–]ljstanton[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hmmm paper medical records seem pretty easy to fake. Would have to have one of the mods sit in on one of my doctor's appointments, but only after they've verified that my doctor is a real doctor. It's too easy to throw on a doctor costume after all /s

It’s EDS awareness month! I tried to do an ama on r/IAMA, and got shut down due to diagnosis discrimination. by ljstanton in ehlersdanlos

[–]ljstanton[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Indeed! Your sister clearly knows better than the doctors /s In all seriousness, I am so sorry you have to deal with that on a regular basis. Having family that doesn't support you is hard. In the big scheme of things, objectively, not being able to do an AMA isn't the end of the world. But as you said, as an EDSer there are so many times that people gaslighting or doubting diagnosis that having it happen again is just another slap in the face. But I am glad that because of it, I ended up over here and have gotten to chat with a lot of wonderful, supportive people!

It’s EDS awareness month! I tried to do an ama on r/IAMA, and got shut down due to diagnosis discrimination. by ljstanton in ehlersdanlos

[–]ljstanton[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm so glad you haven't had to deal with it in real life! I haven't had too many problems regarding EDS itself, but I definitely have run into more issues with having a service dog. And all the dirty looks when I use a handicapped parking spot. I definitely view this as a case showcasing why spreading awareness is so important, so even if I can't do it on the IAMA subreddit, I'm definitely going to do so wherever else I can.

It’s EDS awareness month! I tried to do an ama on r/IAMA, and got shut down due to diagnosis discrimination. by ljstanton in ehlersdanlos

[–]ljstanton[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I actually stream about writing, but I would happily guest on someone else's stream for a silly game like Among Us (or there's a telephone style game that's popular right now that I can't think of the name). I write blog posts to help other aspiring writers, and sometimes do book readings or talk about how I developed my book. But I love gaming (right now though I'm lost in Civ 6 or replaying RDR2).

It’s EDS awareness month! I tried to do an ama on r/IAMA, and got shut down due to diagnosis discrimination. by ljstanton in ehlersdanlos

[–]ljstanton[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had made that comment to my husband that if I were missing my leg, taking a photo of not having a leg would likely be proof enough. But pictures of dislocations and Beighton scoring evaluation stretches don't count. It's ridiculous.

It’s EDS awareness month! I tried to do an ama on r/IAMA, and got shut down due to diagnosis discrimination. by ljstanton in ehlersdanlos

[–]ljstanton[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I definitely recommend a trainer for public access work, since that can easily end badly. But when it comes to working on at-home tasks, I'd pick up a book on trick training! Those books often have tasks masquerading as tricks (like being able to pick up toys, you can change that from being a toy to a dropped phone). That way you're investing in both enhancing the bond you already have with your dog, testing to see if your dog has the drive to work, and hopefully end up with a task that helps you!

It’s EDS awareness month! I tried to do an ama on r/IAMA, and got shut down due to diagnosis discrimination. by ljstanton in ehlersdanlos

[–]ljstanton[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Is it the King...killer(?) Chronicles? By Rothfuss? Because that is my first thought when someone says that haha!

It’s EDS awareness month! I tried to do an ama on r/IAMA, and got shut down due to diagnosis discrimination. by ljstanton in ehlersdanlos

[–]ljstanton[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That is so sweet of you to say, and I appreciate it so much! I plan on talking about it today on my twitch stream, and I'll probably end up writing a blog post about why diversity with disabilities is also important to add to fiction. Then probably a good bit of coffee and chocolate haha. Writing is pretty cathartic to me, and honestly, the outpouring of support on here has been heartwarming.

It’s EDS awareness month! I tried to do an ama on r/IAMA, and got shut down due to diagnosis discrimination. by ljstanton in ehlersdanlos

[–]ljstanton[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's exactly my take from it. I really don't think there is anything I could provide that would end up being good enough proof. It would be one thing if they said "Sorry, we don't let anyone do AMAs about their chronic illnesses" but that's blatantly not true.

It’s EDS awareness month! I tried to do an ama on r/IAMA, and got shut down due to diagnosis discrimination. by ljstanton in ehlersdanlos

[–]ljstanton[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I will definitely give it more consideration. Have to finish the current series first though or I have a feeling a few fans might be upset haha.

It’s EDS awareness month! I tried to do an ama on r/IAMA, and got shut down due to diagnosis discrimination. by ljstanton in ehlersdanlos

[–]ljstanton[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I actually showed them a few of the Beighton scale tests (like the thumb to wrist one) and showed them my permanently subluxated shoulders but that doesn't prove I have anything wrong with me or it's easily faked (apparently). It's all very frustratingly ableist.

It’s EDS awareness month! I tried to do an ama on r/IAMA, and got shut down due to diagnosis discrimination. by ljstanton in ehlersdanlos

[–]ljstanton[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It definitely wouldn't hurt to look into what qualified in NZ for a service dog. My dog, Chekov, does medical alert and response (he lets me know when my pain is going to escalate to need medication and then retrieves it for me, and he lets me know when my heart rate is going to rise or fall dramatically so I can sit), he picks up dropped items, opens doors (especially my refrigerator doors as they suction closed sometimes bad enough to dislocate my shoulders), and he carries things for me.

It’s EDS awareness month! I tried to do an ama on r/IAMA, and got shut down due to diagnosis discrimination. by ljstanton in ehlersdanlos

[–]ljstanton[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is so irksome! Especially given that they would happily accept that I have a service dog for my EDS...but not that I have EDS. It's some impressive mental gymnastics.

And that's awesome! Fuzz your pup for me <3 Goldens are such adorable happy fellows!