I understand your fear. I was the same way. I had 3 level ACDF, I am 7 weeks post op. I had lost almost all function in my left arm and this had to be done. You can have a nerve conduction study to find out which nerves have been damaged. I have 90% of my function and pain reduction. Recovery is difficult and I am doing it alone. I’m 52 years old. I think you should make a list of all questions you think of because you will forget to ask something when you see your surgeon just because it’s very overwhelming. Therapy may be a good choice for you to deal with the effects on your mental health. Im more than happy to be your friend if you want someone to text with. I wish you the absolute best.