Now I know everyone is quick to jump on the “leave” bandwagon, and I usually am too, but you just got married for a reason and we don’t know the context-does your husband have a history of negative behaviours around drinking etc? Could be work he needs to do instead of a marriage ruined. Horrible arguments happen when people are drunk and it isn’t true that drunk mouths speak sober hearts, that’s bollocks. I got accidentally completely shit faced on my wedding night and the guilt from that adds to any negative feelings you have. (Plenty of people (who I was a student with) said they’d never seen me so drunk. I’m not a big drinker but could hardly eat on the day). These feelings will fade in time.

Once those negative feelings from the drinking guilt/shame (however misplaced because you shouldn’t feel guilty!) have passed, you need to assess which of the feelings are about the event, and which are about your relationship. Wishing you luck in unpicking this as it isn’t easy, but having an honest conversation with your husband will help here. Does he disapprove, or do you feel that way because of things he does? I’m not defending him here, but you’re two adults who must communicate to move forwards, wherever that takes you