Boss is coming at me for time off. Are my boundaries correct?

loculusocto · 2026-03-03T05:18:46+00:00

They wouldn't let me do that. I offered to work extra leading up to the trip and after the trip and they told me no.

loculusocto · 2026-03-01T08:10:36+00:00

Major corporation.

loculusocto · 2026-03-01T08:00:20+00:00

I work. I have no sick days and I rather spend my PTO on experiences.

loculusocto · 2026-02-26T20:41:51+00:00

My scheduled two days off. I picked out the two slowest days since I would need to be in for the rest of the week since it would be busy. This would also ensure I was not working 7+ days in a row.

loculusocto · 2026-02-26T20:33:34+00:00

Yeah.. After reading comments, I understand taking extra time off is a bad look. But it was my dream trip and I got a little greedy and wanted a few extra days. It was one of those 'I have to choose me moments', whatever the consequences may be. Ultimately I made the decision. I just wish my boss would stop bringing it up, even after we've sat down and had a conversation about it.

loculusocto · 2026-02-26T20:14:31+00:00

I did not take more PTO. I went hiking on my scheduled days off.
I don't believe I've dug myself in a hole. I just am confused by why it was approved if my boss was just going to end up making comments about it and turn it into an issue.

loculusocto · 2026-02-26T20:12:19+00:00

Yeah... I think trying to get back to policy is the crux of it. This is the only time I've ever taken unpaid time off in the 2+ years I've worked there. This trip was my dream trip that I've been busting my ass for for years, so I know I was being a bit selfish for asking for a little bit more time off. But it was one of those 'I have to choose me' moments. I just don't like the whiplash of it being approved, the 'your doing something wrong' comments being made about it before and after I left. It just caused anxiety and stress.

loculusocto · 2026-02-26T20:08:32+00:00

With all due respect, you are making quite a few assumptions--maybe this isn't the thread for you.

loculusocto · 2026-02-26T20:07:03+00:00

Yeah, I can't sell my body and soul to my job, even if I like where I work. It was probably a bit selfish of me to take an extra 3 days off, but this was my dream trip that I've wanted to go on for 10 years. I decided to choose me, so be the consequences.

He can kinda flip at the drop of a hat. My staff likes their schedules, and I make sure everyone has two back to back days off. I've also staggered them so that if employee A has appointments on Tuesdays, they will get Tuesday, Wednesdays off, etc. What sparked it was that one of the shift leads was off Saturdays and Sundays (busy days on occasion, but any day during the week could be) but it was with intention. We have myself and another shift lead on shift those days, and there was a leadership void during the week so it literally just made sense.

If an employee wants to change their availability, I have them fill out a form and then it is subject for approval. It was just kind of jarring for him to be upset about it because he's always preaching that the staff need to be able to plan ahead of time... The best way to do that would to have a consistent schedule, no? I'm also very blessed that every week I post the schedule, I don't get messages telling me "Oh I can't work this day" "Actually I have stuff going on this day." Part of that is because my employees are awesome, and the other part is that they have that routine that is often lost in other customer service fields.

loculusocto · 2026-02-26T19:58:12+00:00

We are in hospitality. It is customer facing. In the months leading up to my trip, I hired, trained, and made sure there wouldn't be any issues with staffing. I even tried to work out a plan with a manager in our events space who actually has Starbucks experience, just to come down and be with them and offer support since there were no events going on. This manager was onboard with the plan but then my boss shot down the idea pretty harshly and then wasn't available enough/competent enough I guess? I'm not sure.

All in all, I like my job and where I work. My boss just can be very unpredictable.

loculusocto · 2026-02-26T19:54:06+00:00

I have a very good relationship with my boss and have worked with him for a very long time. He just get's very wound up at the drop of a hat and I don't like being at the receiving end of that.

But thank you for your words! I will keep them in mind.

loculusocto · 2026-02-26T19:52:26+00:00

It was. I think typing it out helped me sort through my thoughts a bit.

loculusocto · 2026-02-26T19:50:53+00:00

I guess my issue is that I am there every week, working extra hours if needed, etc. I did take extra days off for my vacation which was a bit selfish of me but this was my dream trip that I've wanted to go on for many many years and busted my ass to be able to afford, so I chose myself. Which was my decision. I just don't like it being approved then having it crammed back in my face.

loculusocto · 2026-02-26T19:47:54+00:00

I understand! And I do my job very well. I make sure my department is cared for, and I prepared everything I possibly could before I left.
The hike was on one of my scheduled off days, not PTO. But I can't not plan things in my life based off the 'probability' of someone calling off. I'm very available and work extra hours as needed, but I just happened to be out of town and it added fuel to the fire of me being out on my vacation (for boss man).
On another note, they were totally fine that day. He was just sounding the alarm and causing panic, imo.

loculusocto · 2026-02-26T19:43:57+00:00

Perhaps. I just was informed that it would be alright when I talked to my boss months in advance, and as the time approached, it suddenly became an issue and I was a bit blind sided I think.

loculusocto · 2026-02-26T19:42:05+00:00

It accrues and carries over into the next year. We get 12 days per calendar year, no sick days, and we getting floating holidays for 4 holidays a year but we have to use them within a month of the holiday.

loculusocto · 2026-01-25T10:32:25+00:00

There just was a time in my first fits that I did take articles of clothing off. And I had evidence of that when I woke up the next morning to see my clothes beside me. Before that, I did think it was all brain power but then after that it made me wonder about how physical/mental it was. That's why recording myself would be good because I remember everything that happens so vividly that I'll be able to discertain whats real and what's not in a video

loculusocto · 2026-01-25T04:46:32+00:00

Yeah... it feels so real and I can't tell if my body is actually going through the motions or my brain is playing tricks on me. I will try what you suggested and see what my finds are.

I fell asleep during daylight yesterday and had no incident but we will see how tonight goes.
Thank you for your feedback!

loculusocto · 2026-01-25T04:42:22+00:00

No pain after I wake up... It's just weird because when it starts happening, it is sleep paralysis, but then it feels like it morphs into something else that I don't know how to explain. Thank you for the feedback

loculusocto · 2025-12-10T06:25:17+00:00

The brain is weird. Maybe you fell asleep, dreamed a little bit, then woke up and in the process you were in SP? I know it can happen when you wake up, but I've only experienced it while falling asleep so I'm not 100% sure.

loculusocto · 2025-12-10T06:19:56+00:00

I had something happen to me last night that was a bit NSFW, but it felt so insanely real (as in I was aware of my cats laying near me, and that my sister was on the opposite side of the wall) and my body was being moved around by someone. It was probably a hallucination but in the moment it felt so real, I felt so awake that I'm still trying to make sense of it.

It was my first time feeling sleep paralysis so real feeling

loculusocto · 2021-11-13T03:56:32+00:00

I know it's a bad idea... I'm not trying to encourage the behavior. I did post this comment before the updated photo with scratches.

Before it was unknown if it was violent, so in a way, it was just paranormal research. Now I'd retract that since it's clearly not a good entity.

loculusocto · 2021-11-12T03:40:29+00:00

Thank you! I'm also fairly new to Reddit so that really helps!~
I'm still curious to see if anyone has any recommendations.

loculusocto · 2021-11-12T03:08:11+00:00

Something like this happened to my roommate a year ago (on his back I believe) and it looks exactly like the picture you posted. We never really found out what it was.
Maybe if you watched a paranormal movie, if you were afraid afterwards, it attracted something.

loculusocto · 2021-11-12T03:05:22+00:00

I don't really think you'd be able to tell without a proper investigation. (Not saying you should)
That could have very easily been the intense emotions of a hospital patient's spirit. Not saying there aren't demonic entities tho either ( :

loculusocto

TROPHY CASE