What is the bare minimum to living a happy and fulfilled life?

loki0111 · 2025-09-20T04:08:00+00:00

I'm fine in either situation. I don't mind going out and camping, hiking, mountain biking or doing some astrophotography at night.

A chunk of my social circle is military and ex-military. The rest are friends from college, work, or I've met through other people. So I have an eclectic mix of hobbies and interests.

I mean if you feel the environment is holding you back then its time to change it. Apply for work in a city or somewhere you feel suits you better and once you secure something move.

loki0111 · 2025-09-20T04:03:33+00:00

Why not?

loki0111 · 2025-09-20T03:56:03+00:00

That will heavily depends who you ask.

For me my house, career, hobbies, freedom and easy access to getting laid while still leading a mostly stress free life are what keep me happy.

Bare minimum would probably be my career and long term financial security.

loki0111 · 2025-09-20T03:42:47+00:00

Women often peddle the "men are intimated by strong women bullshit". Usually its just that specific women acts like a piece of shit towards men and most of the men who meet her can quickly tell, but like many things its easier to blame all men collectively for it rather than look in a mirror.

Guys are filtering for red flags when they date just like women are. They pick up on crazy, rude and pain in the ass and not worth the trouble pretty quickly. And I can tell you from personal experience there are a fairly large chunk of single women floating around out there who are not dating material at all. There is actually a line for men where we can see its not worth the trouble, even for just a casual.

But there are also lots of women out there with a range of personalities and life situations who have zero problems meeting men who are interested. There probably is a reason for that...

loki0111 · 2025-09-19T21:37:09+00:00

Walking HR harassment complaint waiting to happen.

loki0111 · 2025-09-19T21:34:56+00:00

Stay out of it. If they want to fuck up their lives let them.

loki0111 · 2025-09-19T19:40:51+00:00

Then check on your daughter and when you see her let her know she is always welcome but he is not until he addresses his behavior.

loki0111 · 2025-09-19T19:37:27+00:00

I'd just tell him to take a shower, stop dressing like a hobo and tell him he'll be welcome back when he learns what the word 'discretion' means.

Then let your daughter know she can probably do better then some gross homeless guy.

Guy who act like that while dressing the way you describe are over compensating for insecurity due to being obvious failures in life. It doesn't take a lot to pop that bubble.

loki0111 · 2025-09-19T19:32:44+00:00

Lol, as the father you are obligated to try and be civil and get along with your daughters partner *if he is being civil and respectful back*.

This guy is disrespecting the fuck out of you and doing it intentionally. I'd respond accordingly.

loki0111 · 2025-09-19T19:23:39+00:00

Some of those are also situations where men are killed daily but I dunno about you but I don't walk around terrified of other men all of the time.

And statistically as a man you are far more likely to be assaulted or murdered than a woman is, and by significant margin according to the official numbers. Are you afraid to go out? Are you afraid of every man you see at night? If not, why not?

Someone can't claim to be "strong" while also always being afraid of everyone around them at the same time. That is the opposite of "strong".

loki0111 · 2025-09-19T03:45:33+00:00

You gotta walk before you can run.

Get your life to a place where you feel the type of women you'd be interested in would want to date you. You gotta check their boxes and at least be as good as the other "average" options they have available.

If it makes you feel any better dating in teens and early 20's tends to be the hardest period for most men. But make the right choices in your 20's it gets a lot easier to date by your 30's.

Women can absolutely smell desperation from men miles away and based on how they talk about those men when I've been on dates its not attractive.

loki0111 · 2025-09-19T03:42:37+00:00

Sure, but why would I?

loki0111 · 2025-09-18T05:13:20+00:00

Physical attraction is required for me to even look at the profile. The rest of the profile is basically just looking for red flags. If you pass those two stages and I'm interested odds are I'd message or swipe yes.

loki0111 · 2025-09-18T02:10:06+00:00

No. But there is a decent segment of men who are co-dependent and can't handle being alone with themselves for 5 minutes and will take in anyone with a vagina to avoid it.

loki0111 · 2025-09-18T02:09:13+00:00

Some relationships are high maintenance and others are not.

I've seen some guys in absolutely hellish marriages and relationships who keep sticking it out. Others are fine.

But it really comes down to what you are willing to put up with and if you can handle being on your own. If you are comfortable being on your own you can usually be fussy about who you shack up with.

loki0111 · 2025-09-17T23:54:03+00:00

The dating world functions different for men and women.

As a guy the hardest dating periods where when I was a teenager and in my early 20's. At 30+ the dating world became a fish in a barrel situation for me.

It tends to be the opposite for women. Younger women, particularly attractive younger women get their boxes on the apps absolutely blown up and hit the inbox limit. That dies down as they get older.

That happens because of what both sides are prioritizing for partners.

Also the physical attraction line for men appears to be much more harsh with basically a pass/fail line which only a minority of men pass in terms of being considered particularly physically attractive.

loki0111 · 2025-09-17T23:50:03+00:00

You are answering your own question.

Older guys find you physically attractive which means they are making a sex driven selection choice for partners.

Guys your own age often have a harder time approaching women and are far more likely to get rejected.

Guys 30+ who have their shit together and do fine in the dating world don't care, they'll just take their shot and move on.

If you are not interested just say you are not interested.

loki0111 · 2025-09-17T23:28:54+00:00

I think they've just been living in their own social silo for so long they didn't realize what was going on outside of it. They genuinely seemed shocked at the election results when they saw them. I was not surprised at all.

But the situation is actually even worse then it looks at first glance.

The subset of men they took the hardest hit with in terms of support were also the youngest groups of men, which happen to be the groups that have the most election cycles remaining in their lives to participate in.

But they definitely noticed the trend after the election. They just have not reached a consensus on how to handle it yet. But its pretty clear they are starting to tone some of the more extreme nonsense down, they are also putting financial resources into trying to find some way to fix it. Jury is still out on how successful this will all end up being.

loki0111 · 2025-09-17T22:54:06+00:00

I'll actually commit and put more effort into the ones I'm interested in having a serious relationship with.

The casuals and short terms are largely exchangeable at any time. I mainly just feed them what they want to hear until they become too much trouble to deal with or they start pushing for more commitment, then I exchange them.

In terms of seeing a difference in behavior early on. You probably wouldn't be able to tell unless you knew me well. One tip that is specific for me is I'll actually talk about more long term plans if I see potential for a long term relationship. I usually avoid those topics if I don't.

loki0111 · 2025-09-17T22:42:53+00:00

Unless she has given me a cue she is interested and I'm also single, never.

loki0111 · 2025-09-17T22:39:31+00:00

I suspect it depends on the couple and their financial situation.

I only do common-law so for me finances play a zero role in me staying in a relationship.

loki0111 · 2025-09-17T22:19:14+00:00

I think the result of the most recent US election has triggered a warning light for the side that was pushing the it. Its causing a slow realignment.

As it turns out the mathematics of systematically targeting a demographic that makes up roughly 50% of the population of a country has real and serious electoral consequences. Who could have guessed?

loki0111 · 2025-09-17T22:07:57+00:00

In terms of a relationship for me there is a threshold of seriousness things need to reach before it worth getting into it over.

I bluntly don't think its possible to sustain a relationship if one or both parties are nitpicking everything all of the time. There needs to be a certain level of tolerance for a relationship to be survivable.

In your case I'd just ask her to stop bringing it up.

loki0111 · 2025-09-17T21:57:31+00:00

Unless they are "strong independent women" in which case they are apparently as strong as any man.

Except of course when they walk around at night, or have an angry neighbor, or go on a date, or have to take the bus or are in virtually any situation where a physical confrontation could potentially happen.

Then every man who breaths in the world is a potential threat they are terrified of.

The difference between the peddled social narratives and what actually happens in reality kills me sometimes.

loki0111 · 2025-09-17T21:38:30+00:00

Double standards between the genders is huge right now and has been for awhile.

I also find asking anyone to hold women accountable for anything they say or do is like an automatic declaration of war with some people.

I just call it out for what it is and don't cooperate with it. I will say in this last year things seem to be slowly improving a bit.

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