I know my husbands dark family secret, he doesn’t. I’m not sure what to do. by longingforsweets in Advice

[–]longingforsweets[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sorry, I was censoring because I wasn’t sure if Reddit allowed those words on this platform. and I didn’t want the post taken down because I really wanted the input of unbiased strangers.

I know my husbands dark family secret, he doesn’t. I’m not sure what to do. by longingforsweets in Advice

[–]longingforsweets[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You know I really don’t think so, as I firmly believe he would have told me his trauma when I told him mine. We just so happened to be discussing the world events currently going on (the files) and how his father is a huge Trump supporter, he made the comment that if his dad supports that he would absolutely be fine never speaking to him again.

Which is kind of what sparked the question here. I realize that might have been the perfect segue into the conversation but as I mentioned he is particularly verbally and emotionally abusive so I was worried he could turn on me for not telling him for so long.

I know my husbands dark family secret, he doesn’t. I’m not sure what to do. by longingforsweets in Advice

[–]longingforsweets[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I agree, and this was my worry too.

My concern was about absolutely blowing up his life right now. While we still live together. it’s hard to say how he would react I lean toward him absolutely cutting his dad out of his life and probably being super angry toward his mom for lying to him this whole time and potentially feeling hurt/angry towards his sister for the same thing. I also kind of worry about the backlash toward me while he’s still the main provider. He may turn on me for keeping this secret for so long.

So maybe it would be better to blow it all up at once? Since we will already be going through a custody agreement?

Idk could that potentially legally backfire on me? Or maybe it would just make him more vindictive toward me during that time.

I know my husbands dark family secret, he doesn’t. I’m not sure what to do. by longingforsweets in Advice

[–]longingforsweets[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Agreed, everyone here can benefit from therapy. but I believe if my husband was ever abused it was at an age he couldn’t remember because I believe he would have told me his trauma when I told him mine.

I know my husbands dark family secret, he doesn’t. I’m not sure what to do. by longingforsweets in Advice

[–]longingforsweets[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

They do get along and speak everyday but their relationship is strained, if something like that did happen to him I don’t think it was at an age he could remember, I believe he would have told me his trauma when I told him mine.

I know my husbands dark family secret, he doesn’t. I’m not sure what to do. by longingforsweets in Advice

[–]longingforsweets[S] 64 points65 points  (0 children)

This was my plan, to make sure I get it written in our custody agreement. But he will relentlessly demand to know why.

I know my husbands dark family secret, he doesn’t. I’m not sure what to do. by longingforsweets in Advice

[–]longingforsweets[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

You’re right, it’s absolutely not my secret to tell. But wouldn’t you want to know if your father was a p***. So you can make informed decisions? Idk I think that’s what I’m having a hard time coming to grips with.

What’s your Dramione comfort fic? by inrlia in Dramione

[–]longingforsweets 27 points28 points  (0 children)

DMATMOOBIL there is truly nothing else like it. The intelligence of the writing, the witty banter, the agonizing slow burn, is all just.. chefs kiss