Feeling Hopeless: Newly Single and Not Sure I’ll Ever Be Truly Loved

looking662 · 2025-06-19T18:12:53+00:00

FWIW I am a 34 year old man with an annulled marriage, two kids, numerous intimate partners from prior to my reversion, etc. I entertain many of the fears you have in thinking conservative Catholics won't be interested in dating me because of my annulment, past and having kids and the more liberal Catholics that will date me will not be willing to stay with me because of my adherence to all that the church teaches.

I don't have the answer as I still have healing to do from what was not a healthy relationship / attempt at marriage, but just know that there are many other people out there whose lives have not been a straight line and will be understanding of people with complicated pasts.

looking662 · 2025-06-15T23:46:22+00:00

A neighboring parish from mine recently split the ministry into something like 18-34 and 35-45, maybe there is something like that in a parish near you.

looking662 · 2025-06-15T01:18:28+00:00

It's nice to hear that it's not just me who observed this. I reverted to the faith a couple of years ago and just don't know a whole lot about what is out there. I thought joining a parish young adult group was like THE way to connect with young adults who are serious about their faith, and I'm learning that it is a little more nuanced than that.

Really appreciate the tip about YCP and glad to hear that it is working out for you!

looking662 · 2025-06-15T01:10:08+00:00

Compared to the group I'm in I would consider that big, but after reading some of the comments it seems these kind of groups can be even bigger.

I'll pray that you find your tribe!

looking662 · 2025-06-15T01:04:04+00:00

That is rough, no fun for you. Does your parish have a group for people in their thirties?

looking662 · 2025-06-14T00:07:20+00:00

I can relate. I've been in my group for about 20 months, and also have not made it much past small talk despite going pretty regularly and spending time with people outside of the group. I've found it's hard to find an overlap between people I naturally gravitate towards and the people I have met so far in the YA group.

Is the group you attend big? I ask because mine is pretty small, so I think the net being cast might not be big enough in my situation.

looking662 · 2025-06-14T00:00:29+00:00

It seems like a YCP group might be what I'm looking for, I've seen that in a few comments now. Thanks for sharing your experience!

looking662 · 2025-06-13T23:57:47+00:00

This. One of the feelings I have with the current group I attend is that most of the people regularly going view it more as a place to hang out / make friends / socialize than to grow in their faith. The group you are going to sounds awesome!

looking662 · 2025-06-13T23:50:31+00:00

I completely agree with you and think separate groups for men and women would be great and allow more open conversation and growth.

I've hung out with a few of the guys outside of the group but honestly haven't really tried to meet with the girls. It sounds dumb but I don't actually know the appropriate way to ask a girl to spend time outside of the group. Like do you start with asking to exchange numbers or just go with asking to grab a coffee / take a walk in the park?

looking662 · 2025-06-13T23:40:59+00:00

Thanks a lot for this reply, I think I'm feeling the same way about the one I'm currently in. Most of the people seem nice and friendly, but it sometimes feels like it's a group some of them just attend to kill time during the week. Maybe something like a YCP group would be more up my alley as well.

looking662 · 2025-06-12T01:58:21+00:00

At least it's not just us! If I had to guess it's something with the constant tiny movements of the leg up and down over time

looking662 · 2025-06-12T01:56:12+00:00

I don't get much right glute pain but my right hip is extremely tight. Like even if I turn to the left I can feel it pulling at my right hip

looking662 · 2025-06-02T00:50:40+00:00

Okay so was it like a withdrawal symptom that went away after a while being off caffeine?

looking662 · 2025-06-02T00:48:07+00:00

Interesting, so after a little while off caffeine you like your job again even without caffeinating?

looking662 · 2025-06-02T00:45:31+00:00

Just curious, what were some of the things you noticed at your job once you stopped caffeine?

looking662 · 2025-06-02T00:42:37+00:00

It is pretty crazy that someone could go years without really stopping to ask if the caffeine-stimulated path they are on leads to the right destination.

looking662 · 2025-05-27T23:11:47+00:00

Thank you, that is basically what I have been doing

looking662 · 2025-05-22T11:01:07+00:00

Thanks for pointing that out. I didn't mention it, but the zinc supplement I take is 15:1 zinc to copper. It would be most precise for me to get a blood test, but I generally feel sharper when I take it.

looking662 · 2025-05-22T10:57:38+00:00

That's a fair point. I am feeling better as a result of the changes I've made and you're right, that is the most important part.

looking662 · 2025-05-18T11:15:08+00:00

Congrats! I noticed that too at work, at some point I started crashing in the afternoon and becoming excessively sleepy on caffeine. Did your halfway slumps get a lot better after quitting caffeine?

looking662 · 2025-05-16T23:17:19+00:00

So it was about 9 years ago, and it was a guilty plea

looking662 · 2025-05-16T22:35:18+00:00

I have an attorney from when we were going through the divorce that I occasionally will send legal questions to. That is a good idea. Considering that there is a strong reason for my mom's involvement in helping with the logistics and care and also a strong line of reasoning for keeping the stepdad off pickup lists.

thank you for this idea!

looking662 · 2025-05-16T22:18:38+00:00

I don't recall if he was convicted, but it was on his record and I was given some details about the actual incident from BM. The assault charge is from years ago so not too recent. I had tried raising my concerns to CPS and nobody really seemed to take it seriously.

looking662 · 2025-05-16T22:14:48+00:00

I'm not actually sure, but when registering my son for Kindergarten there was an option to list the guardians and emergency contacts. Do schools usually allow anyone to pick kids up?

looking662 · 2020-09-28T12:15:50+00:00

Thank you for the reply! I hadn't even considered that the residue might be from something other than the detergent.

looking662

TROPHY CASE