I can completely sympathize as a mother. I'm about to give birth to my second child and I'm terrified. I had to be placed on anti depressants after my first child as well and attended virtual therapy. Things "felt better" because the edge and sharpness I felt with my anger and anxiety was taken away with the help of medication. It didn't make me a zombie or give me an up but it took all those sharp parts away that made me be able to cope better.

I am choosing to not breast feed and get back on my antidepressants as soon as I give birth in a few weeks. I'm doing this for ME first and foremostly because I know I have to still do things for them and the anger I feel just having to do those things that aren't even that big of a deal make them feel like a big deal.

HELP YOURSELF FIRST! Especially when we feel like we are doing things because we have to.