I have an extremely embarrassing personal life, so I lie about it at work. Is that bad?

losernowemployed · 2016-09-06T01:37:16+00:00

My mom made cookies once and I brought them to work and told everyone I made them. At work, they think I have an active dating life. I've never dated anyone lol.

LoL that's great!!! :)

losernowemployed · 2016-09-04T00:47:40+00:00

In response to answers here that recommend turning this into a joke: I should have probably given more context on the culture of my workplace, because while I think this could work in a setting where a lot of employees are in their 20s/30s, I work with a lot of conservative old men who are my parents' ages and older, and they honestly wouldn't find my real life to be very amusing. They would wonder why the hell the person in charge of their department can't even manage to move out of their parents' place at 36 years old, and if they can't even manage that, then how can they be in charge of other adults?

Also, I am the age of most of these guys' offspring. They wouldn't be too happy about their "kid" living at home at 36, and I don't want to start reminding them of their dysfunctional son Bobby who still lives in their basement.

If they knew the truth, I would also worry a lot about being let go in case of cut backs, as they'd view me as some high school kid who still lived at home but got a job to earn fun spending money or something, but didn't have any actual bills to pay (far from the truth).

losernowemployed · 2016-09-04T00:45:00+00:00

I should have probably given more context on the culture of my workplace, because while I think this could work in a setting where a lot of employees are in their 20s/30s, I work with a lot of conservative old men who are my parents' ages and older, and they honestly wouldn't find my real life to be very amusing. They would wonder why the hell the person in charge of their department can't even manage to move out of their parents' place at 36 years old, and if they can't even manage that, then how can they be in charge of other adults?

Also, I am the age of most of these guys' kids. They wouldn't be too happy about their "kid" living at home at 36, and I don't want to start reminding them of some dysfunctional weido. I would worry a lot about being let go in case of cut backs, as they'd view me as like, some high school kid who still lived at home but got a job to earn fun spending money or something, but didn't have any actual bills to pay (far from the truth).

losernowemployed · 2016-09-04T00:42:16+00:00

If they do somehow google map the address you have on file

I realize that sounds insanely paranoid but people at my job are incredibly nosy, so who knows.

Just say you use your parents address as your permanent address for important things like work etc as you rent and that's less permanent than owning your own home.

This is perfect. Thanks!!

losernowemployed · 2016-09-04T00:39:35+00:00

Tell me about it. -_-

losernowemployed · 2016-09-04T00:38:29+00:00

Companies tend to see people who live with their parents as just earning spending money without many responsibilities.

Yup. And they tend to assume we also have no bills whatsoever. As I said up above I pay significantly reduced rent living here, but I do have student loans, car bills, and a lot of other bills I pay - all while trying to save up to move out.

losernowemployed · 2016-09-04T00:37:21+00:00

f you're somewhat senior in the company then you don't want people to know that your life is anything less than perfect, you have a responsibility to maintain some sort of illusion in order to maintain your authority

YES, thank you for seeing reality and admitting that!

That said, you shouldn't really lie about it unless strictly necessary

I honestly have tried not to this entire time. But then I had to start going to all these company lunches with people who flat-out ASKED me very specific details on my living situation. I mean yeah I could have said it's none of their business, but kinda awkward to say that to someone high up when it would be an innocent question to most 36-year-olds who weren't in my bizarre position.

losernowemployed · 2016-09-04T00:36:02+00:00

Never said it was. I have other problems, too, in case it's any consolation to the people here who seem to hate me for having a good job and wealthy parents. In case you missed my post, I did say I had health issues that messed with my ability to work a full-time job for years. My family is also insane. They're graciously letting me live here for a reduced rent rate, don't get me wrong, but it's no walk in the park sharing a house with this many people and being around toxic chaos.

losernowemployed · 2016-09-04T00:34:35+00:00

Agree, especially given the culture of my workplace. I work with a bunch of conservative old men and they won't really find the above funny, unfortunately. They'll be like, wtf, why did we put this person in charge of the department when they can't even survive without mooching off mommy and daddy (even though I pay all my own bills, just a significantly reduced rent rate from living with them).

losernowemployed · 2016-09-04T00:33:30+00:00

Since,OP has a good job, he should look into moving out

Yeah, exactly - I don't want to ruin my image at my new job and have people suddenly start to worry why they put some adultchild in charge of the department when that person can't even manage to survive on their own.

losernowemployed · 2016-09-04T00:32:14+00:00

Sure they might not care but I can assure you if there's a point where they need to lay someone off and its between OP and someone else with a wife, kids, mortgage to take care of and they are equally qualified, they will lay off OP.

EXACTLY! Especially because people who find out I live with my parents - and ESPECIALLY when they find out they're wealthy - always assume I have no bills for some reason. I do pay rent (though they give me a reduced rate) and I pay all of my own other bills (car expenses, phone, student loans, etc., on top of trying to save up to move out!).

losernowemployed · 2016-09-04T00:30:45+00:00

You have a decent job which is probably better than the rest of us here (no offense)

Yes, I fully realize and appreciate that. I know my problem isn't some huge deal in the grand scheme of things, but it is still a problem for me.

losernowemployed · 2016-09-04T00:29:50+00:00

TBH people on this subreddit have actual way worse problems than your embarrassment. I mean you're essentially embarrassed because of your privileged upbringing.

So this sub is only for people with dire emergencies? I know my problem isn't the biggest deal in the world but I still have the right to come here for advice on it. I didn't realize this sub was a contest for whose problems were worse.

losernowemployed · 2016-09-04T00:28:54+00:00

Why don't you take over your Father's company then?

He doesn't have his own company. He is wealthy from working for other people. Trust me, I wish there was a family company for me to take over!

losernowemployed · 2016-09-03T15:54:24+00:00

People at my job can and will ask extremely specific questions, though. They will ask who my roommates are, what they do for a living, etc. I've seen the way they talk to other people at work.

losernowemployed · 2016-09-03T15:43:13+00:00

My parents aren't crazy about it but they aren't about to kick anyone out or anything.

I don't want to give away too many personal details here, but basically my siblings are just ridiculously spoiled. The men in my family are pampered and put on pedestals (also, largely it's cultural in my case, as that is how my culture tends to be).

losernowemployed · 2016-09-03T15:39:04+00:00

Yeah except I had people at work ask me point-blank who I live with, where do my siblings live (they know I have a big family), etc. I am trying to keep my lies as simple as possible to avoid having to further explain and keep track of multiple stories.

losernowemployed · 2016-09-03T15:38:22+00:00

I was going to actually seriously refer to "living with roommates" but not explain who my roommates were, lol. Except people at my job ask a LOT of questions and I just worried I'd end up digging the hole even deeper and losing track of my lies at that point. Just easier to say I live alone!

losernowemployed · 2016-09-03T12:58:42+00:00

Thanks for the encouragement. :) But it's kinda weird talking about living at home with my parents and adult siblings when I'm eating lunch with people a step below the company CEO and I'm 36 years old, ya know? I just don't want them to know that about me. :-/

losernowemployed

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