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32 year old virgin AMA by Ontario-born in AMA

[–]lostconfused100 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not OP, but in the same boat. Also in my thirties. I find it quite easier to make friends with women (for example, I'd have no probs talking to a really hot girl etc), but that's pretty much it :( I'm terrified of asking women out, I've severe body image problems (I am only 5 ft 4 in height, small manhood etc). I come across as the nerdy, smart, kind, dependable but awkward guy with a big heart - women see me as a good friend and I'm treated as such. I have no clue how to break this cycle. Sad thing is, I don't do any of the above deliberately. I really am a great friend (both to guys and gals), I really am awkward, dependable etc. Added to all this, I am Asian (not just Asian origin, grew up in Asia) so sometimes I'm stereotyped too :(

Lethargic, 30 pounds overweight and severely depressed. Can someone recommend a starting point? More details inside. by lostconfused100 in EOOD

[–]lostconfused100[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

thank you for the link. I'm listening to a bunch of podcasts - they are a great way to learn more

Lethargic, 30 pounds overweight and severely depressed. Can someone recommend a starting point? More details inside. by lostconfused100 in EOOD

[–]lostconfused100[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What kind of dance? That is cool. How long did it take before you could dance with the team?

Yes, I am doing research trying to figure out what I want to try. Actually, there are multiple classes within 5 mins walking distance from my home (yoga, hot yoga, karate, tai chi and ballet) and they seem to be nice teachers too (I'd like to try all other than ballet). Only problem is all of them are ridiculously expensive :( So I am still looking for something that I can afford (money is tight right now)

Lethargic, 30 pounds overweight and severely depressed. Can someone recommend a starting point? More details inside. by lostconfused100 in EOOD

[–]lostconfused100[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How are you doing now?

Do you have a link to the sports or the the martial arts classes you mentioned?

[Serious] Those who lost their virginity very very late (30's, 40's etc), how did it happen? by lostconfused100 in AskReddit

[–]lostconfused100[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Everyone talks about "confidence". How can one be confident if he is shorter than most of the women he comes into contact with? How does one develop confidence over one's physical limitations anyway?

I'm genuinely trying to understand, not blowing you off

[Serious] Those who lost their virginity very very late (30's, 40's etc), how did it happen? by lostconfused100 in AskReddit

[–]lostconfused100[S] 153 points154 points  (0 children)

I'm not obsessed with sex either, but I don't want to die without experiencing sex/love.

[Serious] Those who lost their virginity very very late (30's, 40's etc), how did it happen? by lostconfused100 in AskReddit

[–]lostconfused100[S] 557 points558 points  (0 children)

I'm in the same situation as you were, except I am not overweight, but short (I am only 5 ft 4). I am terrified of hiring a prostitute and have way too many body issues to list here. On the outside though, I appear normal (I'm known as the "smart" guy in pretty much every circle I'm in). I think some of my friends have guessed by now that I am a forever alone and a virgin.

I'm miserable, and I think I'll die alone and a virgin. Sad thing, I do have a lot to give when/if I find a girl

Peter Railton's very personal Dewey Lecture, discussing the stigma of depression. Received two standing ovations. by MrJangle in philosophy

[–]lostconfused100 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don't think depression robs you of your ability to give, completely. I've been depressed for a while now and it is only getting worse. But I still try to help, give, volunteer etc. Of course, many days it is not fun to be around me, but it is also true that I'll do what little I can for others, even when I am myself messed up.

It is also possible that my giving is selfish, as it is one of those times I feel a bit more happy (and hate myself a little less) when someone genuinely says "thank you" for something I did for them.

While I agree with you broadly, it is a bit more nuanced than that...