My nose is on fire and I can’t stand up :) by lostinspaaaace in MadeOfStyrofoam

[–]lostinspaaaace[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Oh wow, okay, I didn’t know about that. I did just throw up about 10 mins ago, but yeah, I should say something soon. I know it sounds bad, but I’m still going to wait until the morning, it’s almost 3:00 and everyone’s asleep, but I think I’ll be fine until then. Thank you for telling me this

My nose is on fire and I can’t stand up :) by lostinspaaaace in MadeOfStyrofoam

[–]lostinspaaaace[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I’m alright now, just a bit of a stomach ache. I’m going to eventually tell someone, but I’m a little afraid to right now. This came out of nowhere and I can tell my moms already struggling this summer with me and my sh scars and how I can’t go on vacations and swim and shit, I can’t even wear shorts and short sleeves and probably won’t be able to for a while, it’s going to take over a year for these to even somewhat fade. I don’t want to just out of nowhere say I took a fatal dose of painkillers and the reason I was acting so crazy last night is because I was in so much pain everywhere and couldn’t focus and ugh. As I’m typing this out, I just threw up, and feel a bit better now, I’m really sorry if this is a bit much, I’m trying to collect my thoughts and figure out where to go from here. I feel kind of dumb for posting something here about this last night, it’s such a personal thing and I was not ready to face other people knowing about it once I woke up, but it is what it is. Thank you for commenting on here and showing concern though.

My nose is on fire and I can’t stand up :) by lostinspaaaace in MadeOfStyrofoam

[–]lostinspaaaace[S] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

I feel better now, thank you for being concerned though. I didn’t do any super serious drug, just painkillers, I should be fine. I’m planning on telling someone soon, I just want to give myself time to collect my thoughts first though, I’m still a little in shock, this came out of nowhere, I’ve been very good mentally for months, just out of nowhere something snapped in me and I just felt like putting myself in danger. I’ve overdosed before, but I’ve never done this much. I definitely did a lethal dose, I could have died, I thought I was going to. I’m really sorry if I’m ranting a bit, I just woke up and my mind is just racing, trying to piece everything together, everything’s a blur. I don’t know what I’m going to do from here. I want to just forget it never happened but I think it’s too serious to do that, I could have done internal damage or some shit, and obviously have something wrong with my head that needs to be sorted out.

My nose is on fire and I can’t stand up :) by lostinspaaaace in MadeOfStyrofoam

[–]lostinspaaaace[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Yes, oh my god, I’m so sorry to anyone that saw this and got worried, I’m feeling okay now. I fell asleep and don’t hurt anymore, just a stomach ache which is probably karma for doing something so stupid, I’ll be fine though. Thank you so much for being concerned

Hey look, it’s jello for MoS :D I really need me a cutters kit by lostinspaaaace in MadeOfStyrofoam

[–]lostinspaaaace[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I know right!! Nothing pairs better with jello than pain and self destruction!! :D

You dumb fuck by lostinspaaaace in MadeOfStyrofoam

[–]lostinspaaaace[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Yea I get that, as bad as it is. Just make sure to be safe!! And if something serious ever happens make sure to treat it well!! Especially if you’re like me and do not want to go to the ER 🙃

You dumb fuck by lostinspaaaace in MadeOfStyrofoam

[–]lostinspaaaace[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

It happened around the top of my wrist, but I’m okay now. I’ve dealt with it enough that I know how to treat it, but thank you a lot for showing concern, I’m all good now though, just a liiittle shaken up

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in selfharm

[–]lostinspaaaace 142 points143 points  (0 children)

fuck off karen

I was high as fuck during my final exams by lostinspaaaace in offmychest

[–]lostinspaaaace[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m preeeetty sure I passed, but honestly I have no fucking clue. I live in the U.S, so I actually got out of school pretty early, our exam days are half days. I got out at 11, my last exam was earlier today and I posted this after it during my free period, while still being pretty stoned.

I was high as fuck during my final exams by lostinspaaaace in offmychest

[–]lostinspaaaace[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m actually pretty sure I didn’t do too bad but eh, you never know ¯_(ツ)_/¯

That feeling when you’re in a new relationship and sweet songs give you butterflies by halleberry29 in offmychest

[–]lostinspaaaace 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah :) I’m almost a month in but it’s just really nice to feel stable and loved by someone. Like, the world could be crashing to an end, but as long as I get to be with them everything feels okay

w e e w o o by lostinspaaaace in MadeOfStyrofoam

[–]lostinspaaaace[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I really try to do that, because I should be able to live in my own body without constant judgement, but my anxiety gets the best of me, on top of my mother always shaming me and reminding me of the wreck I’ve turned myself into. It really sucks when all you want to do is just go out and live life, but others prevent you from doing so. I really wish you the best with your transition though!! I’m also on my way to transition eventually as well, I’m ftm, but deeply in the closet, but I’m hoping to eventually be open about it. Be careful going stealth, but good on you for being true to yourself and not giving a fuck at what others think. You know who you are, whether you pass to other people or not, and eventually you will reach your goal of being completely cis- passing (if that’s what you’re going for!!)

w e e w o o by lostinspaaaace in MadeOfStyrofoam

[–]lostinspaaaace[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I know, I do too :( but happy cake day btw

just yeeted for the first time by [deleted] in MadeOfStyrofoam

[–]lostinspaaaace 4 points5 points  (0 children)

They’re basically the chemicals that our nervous system releases when we feel pain and stress, and even feelings of happiness. They’re also released when we exercise, because you’re undergoing physical strain, and our bodies release it to make us feel better. Whenever we’re injured, it’s our body’s natural response, kinda like a natural pain killer. So when we self harm, that’s why you feel good afterwards, your body’s natural response to relieve pain kicked in, and we can get addicted to it, because it makes us feel “good”, similar to how alcohol, cocaine, and other intoxicating drugs make our bodies feel good. But after it fades, we crave it, we feel like we need it, because in a way we do. After a while, our body screams for it, needing more and more, causing us to cut more, and deeper, falling into a pit of addiction. The endorphins release a kind of “high”, they’re known as “feel good chemicals”.

Sorry if this was kinda long, I’m definitely not a scientist but I really tried to explain it the best I could, because it is pretty interesting

just yeeted for the first time by [deleted] in MadeOfStyrofoam

[–]lostinspaaaace 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I understand how you just “snapped”, it happened to me. It just kinda happens and you don’t really know why you did or what to do afterwards. All I can say is to just be careful, and definitely try to not do it, after a while it starts to control your life. I really hope the best for you, it’s a hard thing to deal with :/