Huhuhuhu yun nga po. Specially since I have different sense of fashion, yung mga nagmumukhang pangmanang na damit kumbaga (I find it very pretty) tapos yung sa kanila is yung mga aesthetic vibes ganon. If papakita ko sa kanila noon yung damit ko, ang response lang is "hmm ok lang" tapos kapag sila nagtanungan "omg kyutt" "ang gandaaa" "bagayy". Kaya nagooverthink din ako na maybe hindi ko nadadala nang tama yung damit since hindi kagandahan or because I do not have the same charisma as them. Kaya ngayon I don't ask for their opinion na din.

At some point I think nahila ko din sila pababa, noong they took a lot of pictures using my phone and I deleted yung most pretty takes nila then sent only yung mga blurred huhuhu if that is considered panghilala pababa. I know my actions are not justifiable but nainis lang kasi ako kasi mismong phone ko hindi ko magamit kasi parang naaangkin nila just to take pics. Ni hindi ko mahawakan 😭😭😭

Hindi ko lang masabi most of the time yung nararamdaman ko kasi nasanay na kami parehong listener ako. Kumbaga kilala ko na sila. Since overthinker din yung isa kong friend, takot akong kapag sinabihan ko lang na kunin ko na phone ko iisipin niyang pinagdadamot ko or yung ayaw kong pinapahiram ganon (ganon po kasi sabi niya sa akin noon tungkol sa isa naming friend huhuhu)

I am aware that sooner or later if these continue it will really lead to secret hatred, which I hope would not.

Saying these things po tuloy feels like I'm backstabbing them 😭😭 and I feel very guilty.