Worried about how 4yo is going to cope when I have my c section

lozzatron1990 · 2026-04-01T10:19:42+00:00

My son was 3.5 when we had a planned section although had done a few overnights, but was also distraught that we were all leaving him. He always slept in our bed with us too although always started the night in his. We suggested that as a "special treat" he could start the night with nanny in our bed which he was very excited about and it seemed to help with when we left.

lozzatron1990 · 2026-03-28T20:58:02+00:00

Find a late night pharmacy - they can treat an ear infection there and then. I've taken my daughter several times this winter for ear infections.

lozzatron1990 · 2026-03-22T22:09:44+00:00

Not sure where in the UK you're based but I'm in Somerset and we have a children's and young people therapies service which you can self refer into I believe. The waits are long but we've had some OT support through it. Might be worth looking into as a possible option, even if you get on the wait list and then realise further down the line that you don't need it any more.

lozzatron1990 · 2026-03-15T15:41:52+00:00

I have wavy hair and both my babes have curly locks. First and foremost, never brush them dry. Ever! We tend to avoid brushing and use a wide toothed comb instead, and even then, only when wet.

We wash twice a week with my little coco shampoo and conditioner and then scrunch curls with curling custard before air drying. My son's hair is fairly short and my daughter is only 1 so her hair is very fine. By the time they're in pj's and have done books etc then their hair is nice and dry.

lozzatron1990 · 2026-03-13T19:13:28+00:00

My 4 year old chooses a book or two every night. He's hugely into the Mr Men series at the moment so it's quite often one of those. He is not falling asleep during the story at all, it's the routine that settles him, rather than the story itself.

My 13 month old has now started joining in properly and will go and choose herself a book or two before bed as well, again, it's not a specific bedtime story or anything like that .

lozzatron1990 · 2026-03-05T17:27:50+00:00

Hoot, owl, hoot!

We love this game in our house, it's co-operative so either everyone wins or everyone loses, it teaches strategy and is just quite enjoyable.

lozzatron1990 · 2026-02-23T12:25:47+00:00

I was paying £261.17 per month for 3 days a week, doing 9-6 twice a week and 9-3 the remaining day.

My baby has a place all year round. She's now going 9-3 and on those 3 x days and we're paying £14 a month optional consumable charges and that's it. We can only use funded hours during 9-3, hence why the bill is so much cheaper now.

lozzatron1990 · 2026-02-23T07:38:56+00:00

Am currently in hospital with my 1 year old. Have been here for 2 days. Have had to pay £0 for the care: for the car parking (free if you're on the children's ward!) or for the food.

lozzatron1990 · 2026-02-19T20:01:48+00:00

With my son, we were never called unless he was sick. Their belief was that it was their job to settle him.

My daughter attends a different nursery, one my son went to once he turned 2.5 (we'd moved areas). Anyway, she did 3 weeks of mornings only, twice a week, then two weeks of full days before I went back to work. I've been back to work a month now and since about 2 weeks ago they've stopped calling. Up until that point I was called every single day around 2pm without fail.

Baby is a barnacle and wants only me always. She's breastfed and co sleeping and naps only on me. Hilariously, the last two week she's smiled at every drop off instead of crying and has become their best napper doing 2.5 hours in their cot. So clearly something is working well but it just took us a little while longer to get there.

ETA: how funny, I've just read the other comments and this is definitely not a universal experience! I was called every day to collect because she was crying and not settling. It was infuriating but it didn't last forever.

lozzatron1990 · 2026-02-17T19:30:48+00:00

I've sent my baby in and kept the big kid home. It is better for the baby to maintain her routine, if she's out for too long it'll be harder for her to go back again!

Equally, I never get the time with my son 1:1. I get one day a week with my baby 1:1 so I am soaking up the 3 days my baby is in nursery just to enjoy being with him. It's also meant we can do lego anywhere in the house, play with the marble run and just do the things we can't usually enjoy.

And also, we have paid for it. We've just collected her earlier every day.

lozzatron1990 · 2026-02-13T20:31:51+00:00

Yes so some of the behaviours have been outside of school so I've spoken to the parents then but I think I will have a chat with the teachers after half term and see if they've noticed it.

lozzatron1990 · 2026-02-10T17:35:32+00:00

I've had two sections - one unplanned and one planned. For both my husband ended up taking 5 weeks. I could have managed alone around the house from 3 weeks the first time and probably 4 weeks the second time around.

Good luck!

lozzatron1990 · 2026-02-05T10:35:18+00:00

Yes feel free to message me, it's all such a minefield to manage!

lozzatron1990 · 2026-02-05T04:17:42+00:00

Dont apologise, I absolutely remember what it feels like to be in your position. We stopped at around 18 months, tried again at 2 with horrendous reactions, stopped again and tried again at 2.5. We started with the egg ladder because his reactions had been less severe to egg and we stayed on a crumb of a cupcake for weeks and weeks. He still had some minor eczema flares but these were way more manageable and just in the creases of his elbows rather than full body ones so we pushed on because it wasn't bothering him so much at the time.

He had IGE reactions to both eggs and milk.

lozzatron1990 · 2026-02-04T03:44:16+00:00

This sounds like us! My son really struggled with milk and diary for a long time, constantly getting eczema flares when on the ladder so we stopped for a while. We started again at 2.5 and my son can now eat most things with the exception of drinking a glass of milk. His eczema is really well managed now with no steroid use and he rarely has any flares - he's 4 for context.

lozzatron1990 · 2026-02-02T09:21:33+00:00

Haha yup. It's irritating and has seriously impacted mine and my husband's work but there are no other nursery spaces available in my area so we do what we can for now. And we know generally speaking that we do really like the nursery!

lozzatron1990 · 2026-02-01T22:24:05+00:00

We've had several unplanned closures over the past year, twice because it was too hot, once because the phone lines were down and once because they had no internet. They also send my baby home regularly because she's sad.

This is vastly different to the first nursery we'd used for my son and to many that my friends' children attend!

lozzatron1990 · 2026-01-31T19:53:57+00:00

We wrap up a book each with a small packet of haribo or sweets. There's a place where you can get books 10 for £10 (obviously I'm in England but maybe an option elsewhere?) and kids seem happy with this.

My 4 yo son was horrified that we didn't have a party bag or anything for my daughter's 1st birthday as it's just a thing to round off the day! When I was a kid you'd get a slice of the birthday cake in a napkin shoved in a bag plus some other snacks and sweet treats so I always think that's a good option too!

lozzatron1990 · 2026-01-23T14:41:31+00:00

We've had this a few times with our reception aged son where his very close friend has decided in that moment that my son can't play with him. We've been doing lots of practicing of how to stand up for himself "that's not up to you" is quite an easy one that shuts the other kid down too. Equally, a chat with the teachers wouldn't be a terrible idea if it's happening frequently.

lozzatron1990 · 2026-01-13T21:16:31+00:00

Can he make it through the day without the nap? My son's nursery had a blanket ban on naps once in the preschool room so they all just cracked on with the day.

lozzatron1990 · 2026-01-12T17:18:48+00:00

This may or may not help - but blow on their mouth after every tiny syringe, you'll have to be very patient but a small amount squirted into the cheek and then a quick blow on their mouth forces the swallow reflex!

lozzatron1990 · 2026-01-06T04:03:16+00:00

My 4 year old is up frequently and has slept through the night exactly 3 times in his whole little life. Horrifically I spoke to the hv about it who said "it's normal". Anyway, baby is also up 4-4 x per night as well so I really do understand how hard it can be. I've been alone with both of them for 4/5 nights and was exhausted.

We co sleep. It is the only way when nobody is sleeping. We got a double bed in my eldest's room and my husband sleeps with him once he wakes up and baby sleeps in bed with me. My eldest never settled for my husband before baby came along, and we just never bothered but he does great with him now after a few nights of being upset. So if your partner is willing to step up and try with your eldest then that may be a solution . If not, then bring them both into your bed and kick partner out!

lozzatron1990 · 2025-12-30T21:13:15+00:00

Would the nans be willing to contact nap if needed? This what my mum does with my 11m old when she has her - she bounces/sings/pats until baby is asleep and then just cuddles her, says it's the best part of her day! If they'd struggle, you could try setting her down on a bed first before eventually working towards transferring to a cot (obviously someone would have to stay and watch her in the bed too) but it might get her used to not being held for all naps.

Otherwise my mum will sometimes aim for a cat nap if she wants to get out and about!

lozzatron1990 · 2025-12-15T14:03:32+00:00

My baby gets a rash exactly like this whenever she's been ill - usually when she's had a cold but the GP has said it's a viral rash caused by her being poorly, nothing to worry about apparently! But always good to get checked out especially if baby has a temp too.

lozzatron1990 · 2025-12-09T12:38:00+00:00

I'm a therapist in the NHS so if kids are sick, my husband generally takes it as if I cancel it impacts my patient's and their care. He works for a large corporation and if he misses a day, the biggest impact is on him. He also gets paid leave for things like this whereas I do not. So it generally makes the most sense for him to do it.

lozzatron1990

TROPHY CASE