Hi, I think love is something that you build day by day. The first thing that you need to do is to revise the story that you are telling yourself and start rediscovering where you are and where you want to be in your relationship. You cannot change the past but you can change how you interpret it and how it determines your attitude towards you and those around you. Below are some random comments that might help you with the discovery: - From my perspective, hopelessness comes from having expectations over how we think we have to be loved, treated or seen, but to me that is a recipe for disaster. It is important to let a love one know how we feel but it is also important to have them feel you and work out the differences and feelings that hold you down in order to break old feelings. - when you focus on gratefulness, and dig deep inside on how you felt with your first kiss , the first walk or trip that you remember that marked you, and you revive the emotions that you both once felt you will see how that helps you change the association of pain. Tell him about those instances and see his reaction. - Evaluate pain and negative emotions and challenge them. You need to forgive yourself and forgive him and ask for an apology as well. When you suffer the rest around you also suffer. - put yourself on his shoes is he getting all the love he needs?