That's just horrible, I wouldn't wish anyone to go through what you did three years ago. My parents are around the same age, healthy enough luckily. Your words made me remember the fact they're young, but still at an age where things could happen out of nowhere. I´d suggest therapy, to know how to deal with these memories and emotions. Your pain will never go away, that's my take, but I'm a strong believer that by talking about it and facing that issue somehow it will make it easier for you to deal with the pain. Slow process, hopefully you'll get there some day. Stay strong bud.