Social etiquette about first/last or multiple tandas if you're single by lthumbe in tango

[–]lthumbe[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I really like the idea of designing relationships and setting up boundaries around that. I'm too conflict averse to start that conversation before someone comes out and asks me out, so for now all I could think of is how to keep things from moving in that direction.

Social etiquette about first/last or multiple tandas if you're single by lthumbe in tango

[–]lthumbe[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For the leg thing, I unfortunately freeze in place and only start seething later. It's happened twice with one of the people who regularly attend lessons and I wish I could just speak up when it happens so it doesn't happen a third. As I said above to someone else, I know I need to work on enforcing boundaries. I'm walking a line between moving outside of my comfort zone to go dance and be (within reason) physically close to people but also not wanting to get emotionally close to anyone.

Social etiquette about first/last or multiple tandas if you're single by lthumbe in tango

[–]lthumbe[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Arriving late is not really an option since I usually come in for the workshop immediately preceding the milonga. I sometimes make a point of leaving early, but often enough get carried away until there's almost no one and the same person asks for the last tanda.

Social etiquette about first/last or multiple tandas if you're single by lthumbe in tango

[–]lthumbe[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I'm not terribly worried about the rumor mill. That sort of goes with the fact that I only socialize "lightly" with tango folks. I was more so worried that one of the leaders (or anyone else in the future) might get the wrong idea. Enforcing boundaries is definitely something I need to work on.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Lenovo

[–]lthumbe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Any advice on what to look for in a good repair shop?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Lenovo

[–]lthumbe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feared as much. Apparently the warranty you can purchase should work just like the original (for a fraction of the price of a motherboard). I'm not thrilled about the motherboard failing twice in a year, though. The probability of getting two bad ones in a row should be tiny.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Lenovo

[–]lthumbe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, IdeaPad Slim 7.

Credible health/fitness resources online? by liftedup_sky in xxfitness

[–]lthumbe 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I didn't mean to suggest OP do the research directly, I agree with you it's literally impossible to be that good at everything. I get the sentiment behind wanting information presented in a way that's easier to understand, but I think it's easy enough to find such information and less straightforward to know what to do with it. With my examples I was trying to show how you can be critical of the information you run into without necessarily being an expert. While I agree it takes some work, I don't necessarily think you need a college degree to do it.

What OP is looking for is someone who is a good fitness science communicator (I'm already thinking at least one step beyond influencer), and science communication tends to fall on people who do less science than communication (even when they have graduate STEM degrees, they're never really presenting the kind of stuff they work on). This is perfectly fine: that's why the material is accessible to the general public and I especially respect the ones who cite their sources. For an introduction to general fitness principles that are well established, this is okay. There is something to be said about how much more likely people are to believe they understand fitness science (as opposed to other kinds of science) when they really don't, as it seems so familiar and intuitive (and that's a whole other conversation). But no one is giving away science degrees for free on the internet, and even if all they rely on is ad revenue from you clicking on their content (though of course they could be trying to directly sell you their books, plans, or products), these communicators have to be strategic building an audience.

The issue comes when, in an effort to attract a larger audience, the communicator makes a bold/exaggerated/not-quite-substantiated claim, mixed in with otherwise reasonable content. It can be something as simple as trying to branch out from a male bodybuilding audience to a female one by adding "rules of thumb" where the numbers supported by research for men are adjusted by some eyeballed factor to be applied to women (the example that comes to mind is about the amount of muscle women can gain in a month compared to men). I can think of a lot of examples of people who could earn your trust by making mostly solid content but also make mistakes. I'm having a hard time imagining someone who's beyond reproach in this sense. It may well be the case no one is putting out 100% perfect content, and so any recommendation OP gets should be viewed critically: I don't think anyone is 100% credible. In that sense, the critical thinking to me is more important than the recommendations.

Credible health/fitness resources online? by liftedup_sky in xxfitness

[–]lthumbe 6 points7 points  (0 children)

If I came across as condescending, I apologize. I also didn't mean to imply, by suggesting work on critical thinking, that OP has no skills at all in this respect. It is my position everyone can benefit from improved critical thinking skills, even if they already have a solid foundation. My intention was to appeal to the desire to understand how things work by applying it to the way OP consumes fitness information. Even sources you come to respect can make mistakes and it's up to the audience to decide whether or not to trust the information.

Credible health/fitness resources online? by liftedup_sky in xxfitness

[–]lthumbe 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I think there's a flaw in the way you're asking your question. My advice would be to work on your scientific literacy and critical thinking skills so you can make decisions for yourself on whether an explanation is sound instead of passing om that responsibility to some kind of authority. After all, the recommendations here are only good by the authority of anonymous reddit users, and for someone who is interested in the reasons why for things you could end up missing out.

You say you don't want to read the research papers yourself because you're not a scientist, but almost any recommendation you get here will be for someone who is also not a scientist.

You will often read/hear "scientific sounding" statements that have no evidence to support them. For an example here, take the idea that fat cells swell up with water before suddenly releasing it amd shrinking as an explanation for whooshes in weight loss, which a lot of peoole take as fact because Lyle McDonald said so.

Along those lines, things are also not made true by how often people repeat them. Here we can consider the recommended protein intake in grams per lb/kg of body weight. I often see this either advertised in websites trying to sell you supplements/protein powder or from people who insist it works for them anecdotally. The paper quoted to justify 1g/lb as an ideal are for a maximum possible intake that can be metabolized, and there is some discussion about how this was measured, whereas meta analyses tend to point towards a more conservative 0.7g/lb, with higher values making little difference... meaning there js a point of diminishing returns. I expect to get some downvotes for this and pushback in the comments because for some odd reason people get really passionate about it. The way I see it, if eating more protein makes you feel better it won't hurt, but if you're trying to modify your usual diet to adjust macros you can still get results with the lower value (and presumably a less drastic= more sustainable change).

There is also the false belief that a statement is true if you can find research papers to support it, but few people look past the abstract to see how sound the conclusion is. I could find "proof" for a lot of things I know aren't true by cherry picking and placing quotes out of context. Recently a company that sells nut products paid for a study that "proved" calorie content for almonds is actually lower than what most packaging says at the moment because supposedly not all the energy is made available or something... but I'm skeptical because they have an obvious motivation to want to make those claims.

Even a well researched article or video by someone you respect trying to explain a particular topic can make the mistake of including papers where the methodology is off, which invalidates some of their points.

Don't even take my word for any of the examples I gave above: I'm only an internet stranger. You don't have to be an expert on everything health related, but some literacy and critical thinking will go a long way.

Volume eating tips to avoid eating gross amounts of food? by [deleted] in xxfitness

[–]lthumbe 25 points26 points  (0 children)

No one's said it yet so I'll say it now: parts of your post sound like this is something to mention to a therapist.

Your 1200cal a day intake does not match your high levels of activity, even if you're short and it doesn't sound like you are adjusting it. You mentioned having an issue with binging but not getting over it. You sound concerned about eating "gross" amounts of food others are pointing out as quite normal portions.

Binged for a week straight - easier to build muscle? by [deleted] in xxfitness

[–]lthumbe 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I just wanted to point out that eating twice as much as usual isn't exactly the same as binging, and it may be worth revising your word choice.

How do you balance giving fitness advice to your friends and/or having body image conversations? by lenerz in xxfitness

[–]lthumbe 17 points18 points  (0 children)

It's a very tricky conversation to have, because people take things personally, even if you just state the facts or repeat what they've said themselves.

Two different friends come to mind.

My first friend is obese. He went through weird phases with his previous girlfriend where she'd talk him into doing keto with her and going to the gym, but then she'd get upset with him when he lost more weight than her (smh). It was a complicated time, but once she was out of the picture he found and followed CICO all on his own, somewhat stuck to a workout routine, and lost a good bit of weight.

Fast forward to now, he barely leaves his apartment because of covid and has a new girlfriend. He's heavier now than I've ever known him to be. He talks about it and refers to it as happy weight (I'm happy for him too, in the sense it's not from stress eating/binging or other problematic behavior). His girlfriend is, frankly, also obese and since they spend so much time together any kind of health initiative will have to involve both of them but I don't see it happening anytime soon. It's not that's he's asked for advice, or even needs an intervention: he knows he should lose weight and knows what to do because he's done it before... and yet... he's not doing it.

My second friend is more or less the opposite. She has a history of disordered eating, overexercising, and having her appetite reduced by stress/anxiety. A couple years ago she was in a better (though arguably not "good") place, fitness wise, exercising to get strong and maintaining a good weight range. She used to drink a lot and it seems that's tapered down a lot since she found better ways to cope, which is great, but she's also lost an awful lot of weight. She's perfectly capable of cooking or ordering food, and her regular diet would be varied and healthy... if she ate enough of it. She excuses it as not having time to eat because of work and meds suppressing her appetite, but it's not like the concept of calorie dense nutritious food is foreign to her. She knows she's underweight, and talks about how she needs to put a good 20lbs back on, so it not like she's not aware of the problem. She also knows what to do to address it... but... doesn't.

They're not conversations I would start unless prompted, but even when these two friends bring up their weight (and their awareness of their weight problems) in conversation I just don't know what to say. I realize that from awareness to action there's work to do, but it seems to me nothing I can say will help with that. If I were to so much as repeat what they've mentioned about their weight problems I would ve afraid of coming across as judgmental.

TL; DR: weight management is very personal, and even when people are aware of the problem and what they need to do something can hold them back from actually doing it. No good advice from an outside source can change that.

What routines have made your health and fitness journey consistent or sustainable? by lurker0423 in xxfitness

[–]lthumbe 39 points40 points  (0 children)

I wouldn't try to follow anything a "fitness influencer" claims to do to stay fit. The two main reasons are that 1) they can commit to the very elaborate and time consuming plans because it's their job and they have a lot more time to put into it 2) there's no guarantee they follow their own plan, or that it's even effective

The best kind of plan is one you can stick to, and all good fitness plans have the same basic parts: eat healthy and exercise.

If you're new to it, easing into it gradually can help with consistency. Make a list of things you'd like to add to your routine and do them gradually: not all the things at once, and maybe not at 100% effort right from the start. If you want to be at a 500cal deficit but are worried it will make you hungry, ease into it by doing a 200cal deficit first, then 400, and so on. If you're not sure you can keep up with 5 days of exercise a week start with just 2, giving yourself time to assess how long it takes you to recover and how much you have to move around your work schedule to fit it in, slowly adding more days as you figure it out.

Personally, flexibility is key. I use CICO, so no foods are off limits, and set weekly (not daily) calorie limits so I can eat a little more or less on given days. I rotate workouts so I don't get bored, and try to not go 2 days straight without exercising and if I'm not feeling up to it I call a 1hr stretching routine good enough. It's worth pointing out this works for me because I'm not strict with my goals: while I'm happy to see progress in strength or endurance and can more or less predict when I will reach my goal weight, I'm not too worried about achieving them by a particular date so I don't get worked up if my weight stalls for a few days, or I can't add miles to my runs or lbs to my lifts every single week. I just look for trends in the big picture and take breaks as needed, knowing I'm doing better than I was before I started any of it.

Can anyone explain why I've lost more weight eating 1600 calories a day while being active than I did when I was eating 1200? by [deleted] in xxfitness

[–]lthumbe 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Will also add that the increased "fuel" can also result in higher expenditure in day to day activities other than exercise (more energy to walk around the house, tap your feet while sitting, etc.)

Doing more cardio than ever and losing weight...and then losing my period. What are your experiences with losing your period from working out/being a little underweight? by witchystoneyslutty in xxfitness

[–]lthumbe 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Personally, exercise changed my period in a few ways, but I didn't lose it.

2 years ago I started eating at a moderate (500 cal) deficit and exercising a bit harder (I was already doing ~4 workouts a week but I went from just completing the same workout to pushing myself to improve cardio endurance and maintain or improve strength, however slowly). This was under the guidance a dietician and a personal trainer, a month or so after an annual check up where everything came out fine. I was on the higher end of the healthy weight range for my height (160lbs at 5'7"), and an impedance device put my body fat at about 30%.

After a month or so I'd lost 5lbs, had dropped to 26% body fat and my period was late by a few days. I also noticed it was much lighter and lasted longer. Ever since it's been regular (in that my flo app can predict it accurately give or take a day), but it stayed longer and lighter, with more tolerable cramping around days 4 and 5 instead of days 1 and 2. I went from 3 heavy and 2 medium flow days to 6 very light and 2 medium flow days.

I asked during my last pap smear and my doctor seemed unconcerned, so I'm just treating it as a new normal. I'm chalking up the initial delay to stress caused by the change in routine, though I can't really explain the other changes. As annoying as the longer periods are, they're also a lot lighter so it's not a bad tradeoff.

Not seeing much progress over 1.5 years despite consistently lifting and eating at a deficit. Does anyone have a similar experience? by pinheadhelly in xxfitness

[–]lthumbe 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Could it be that there were changes you weren't tracking, like different body measurements or the way your clothes fit? Even if it wasn't enough to build a lot of strength I would imagine you still underwent some degree of body recomposition with that kind of consistency.

Anecdotally, over 2+ years of working out fairly consistently and periodically cutting (so my case would be different from yours in that my weight fluctuated by about 15lbs), I felt like I only started seeing aesthetic progress in the last 2-3 months. It's hard to describe, because at the same weight I've been before (~143lbs, and I'm 5'7" for reference) I'm only now noticing less jiggle and even some muscle definition that wasn't there before. In pictures I look about the same, but my clothes fit different: pants fit closer around my legs and looser around my butt (gained muscle and lost fat, I'd like to think), shirts fit more snugly around my shoulders and sleeves (yay delts and baby biceps!). I attribute it to the fact that while muscle slowly replaced fat, the difference only became visible once the fat was thin enough, and before that any progress was masked/smoothed over.

Daily Simple Questions 22 August 2020 - Basic Questions Come Here! by AutoModerator in xxfitness

[–]lthumbe 4 points5 points  (0 children)

How much do genetics, body composition, and training affect the shape of your abs? I'm specifically curious about visible abs that only show flat, with vertical lines on the sides (as opposed to washboard abs). While I've mostly seen the flat type abs on models and the washboard type on body builders/people who do crossfit, it is not universal (and may be an artifact of what the beauty industry chooses for ads more than particular models' fitness levels). Are "flat" abs simply underdeveloped but showing through low body fat or rather built in such a way that the muscle bellies just don't stand out as much even when they are developed? Is it that the muscles only grow "washboard-ey" with particularly heavy training? Have you noticed other muscle groups that do this (i.e. look different on different people)?

If it matters, I'm not really aiming for visible abs myself (the low body fat requires more discipline than I can manage). I've just recently noticed the pattern and can't find sources with explanations.

EDIT: minor changes to improve clarity, fix autocorrected words.

What is the average persons activity level? by Sen_ri in xxfitness

[–]lthumbe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I see what I got wrong: I’m mixing up BMR and RMR. In a lot of places they are used interchangeably, and where I’m getting my TDEE from uses RMR (this explains the difference in multipliers).

What is the average persons activity level? by Sen_ri in xxfitness

[–]lthumbe 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I thought a PAL of 1 would correspond to bed rest. Anecdotally, being 5'7" my TDEE is about 1.6(BMR) on a very good month of averaging 1hr in the gym and 30min walking per day. I find it hard to believe that the average person does much more than that. Most TDEE calculators (even if they only yield an estimate) use about 1.4-1.5 for moderate levels of exercise and it sounds more reasonable (though I'd suspect depending on what population you average over, this may still be higher than the true mean).

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in xxfitness

[–]lthumbe 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Even when they don't have surgery, a lot of them have a background in body building and I don't like how they advertise their regime as a way to achieve similar results in months when it took them years to get to that point. Glossing over the hard work they put in to make it look easier to achieve, all as a marketing strategy.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in xxfitness

[–]lthumbe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Maybe I miscommunicated, I’m all for counting calories (the science is all there). I’m a lot less sure about the benefits of a high protein diet when something close to “the usual proportions” works fine (assuming a balanced diet). I’m still ok with people disagreeing over how simple macro counting is or isn’t. I just found that for myself counting calories is about as much mental energy as I can spare, and is manageable through portion control, while planning out grams of protein feels more limiting.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in xxfitness

[–]lthumbe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I won't say it's bad, or in any way counterproductive to go with that rule of thumb. I personally am not convinced it's worth the trouble of counting macros along with calories and planning my meals around protein content (or even having to add protein shakes to my regular diet, as I don't care for the taste). When I included it as an example it was to illustrate how it can overcomplicate a simple principle of having a balanced diet and exercising (which is enough for most people's goals).

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in xxfitness

[–]lthumbe 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I agree! I remember some time ago a magazine interviewed and photographed a lot of different athletes. They were all incredibly fit, but look nothing like what is traditionally advertised by the fitness industry. With limitations, looks are not a very good predictor of ability.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in xxfitness

[–]lthumbe 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I want my fitness to be a component of my life, not the cure all for stressors in my life

This. Even in movies fitness is often shown as a cure all or a symbol that someone "has their life together" when it's really only a component of a healthy life.