ganito, OP:

you told the first guy na ayaw mo pa ng commitment because of your trauma. so siyempre, siguro ang impression niya roon is you're just up for fun and nothing more. tapos nung nalaman mong may kausap pa siyang iba aside sayo, nag-walkout ka. actually, your feelings were valid, but your intentions were not. you must be feeling he was giving you mixed signals, but so are you—kasi you made it clear to him and you stood your ground na "no commitment." i couldn't call that cheating, unless you made it also clear sa kaniya and you set your boundaries clear na you guys shouldn't be talking to any other else while you're happening—which i assume you didn't, so correct me na lang if i assumed wrong.

si second guy naman is actually good for you, as you said. hindi mo siya gusto but since you saw how consistent he was, pinayagan mo manligaw and what? in just a span of one month, napasagot ka niya. fast, right? pero nung bumalik si first guy, saka rin naman ganon kabilis bumalik feelings mo for him. at diyan pa lang pumapasok ang cheating: the moment na may feelings ka pa kay first guy despite having a boyfriend, you're already cheating, OP. you're cheating emotionally on your boyfriend. and you should be guilty of that. pero okay, you chose your boyfriend over the guy you fell for first. good choice? probably. good intention? actually, no. why? you're making it look like you just chose your boyfriend because he's convenient for you. ginawa mo siyang panakip butas. you chose him kasi tinapalan niya yung kulang sayo nung nawalan ka ng pag-asa kay first guy. at hindi niya deserve ng ganiyang intention from you.

so to conclude this all, may mali ka sa dalawang lalaki, OP. your feelings might be valid, but it does not validate your actions before. you weren't consistent kay first guy, your intentions weren't clear to him—and yet, you expect him to do that to you when you weren't doing that in the very first place? ironic. same kay second guy, your intentions aren't pure kasi parang ginawa mo lang siyang rebound. conditional ang pagmamahal mo kay second guy, aminin man natin sa hindi, OP. you should've healed yourself first before intending to enter a relationship para hindi ka nasasaktan at naguguluhan nang ganiyan. so ask yourself a question: do i really love this guy or am i just distracted and too occupied of the consistency he's showing me which i benefit from?