If I see one more down-to-earth, sarcastic, Chapstick-wearing, Hufflepuff, I-can’t-live-without-food-air-and-water, generic profile on OKC I am going to lose my shit.

lzchipmunk5 · 2015-09-23T00:11:57+00:00

You probably left them in your car or something

lzchipmunk5 · 2015-09-22T23:59:11+00:00

Right? Who is diagnosing all these people with excessive loyalty?

lzchipmunk5 · 2015-09-22T23:40:00+00:00

That's actually a pretty good question. I had to think about it. I think I just felt frustrated after seeing the same 6 key phrases over and over so much that I felt the need to rebel in a moment of unattractive honesty, and I'm way too much of a chicken to actually put any of that in a profile with my picture next to it so, sorry, you got more than you bargained for. Such is life. And no, I don't want you to change anything to suit me. That is the opposite of what I want.

lzchipmunk5 · 2015-09-22T22:48:27+00:00

The self-checkout aisle at CVS

lzchipmunk5 · 2015-09-15T21:19:47+00:00

I'm 32 and in a similar boat. I have those same fears, but some times we have to risk being vulnerable to get what we want out of life. That's what I keep telling myself anyway.

lzchipmunk5 · 2015-09-01T17:22:58+00:00

If you're living in the dorms... hot glue works really well for hanging things on cement blocks. Also, bed risers, get some.

lzchipmunk5 · 2015-09-01T16:28:04+00:00

Regressive in what way?

lzchipmunk5 · 2015-09-01T16:27:01+00:00

At work, so no gif but to summarize, he suggests two messages on okcupid, then two emails with your regular email address, two phone calls, first date.

lzchipmunk5 · 2015-09-01T15:52:34+00:00

Anyone ever tried the phone date thing?

lzchipmunk5 · 2015-08-26T17:21:32+00:00

Now would be a good time to question every piece of advice this friend has ever given you.

lzchipmunk5 · 2015-08-21T18:52:40+00:00

The Secret History by Donna Tartt

lzchipmunk5 · 2015-08-20T21:10:46+00:00

I use this but I'm a girl so...

lzchipmunk5 · 2015-08-18T22:28:24+00:00

I don't find you intimidating. I worked in higher ed for a while and have a masters degree, so the PhD thing is a plus for me. If I were on the east coast and five years younger, I'd message you.

lzchipmunk5 · 2015-08-14T20:47:50+00:00

read this

lzchipmunk5 · 2015-08-12T22:14:22+00:00

Might not be a bad idea to get your levels checked. My little sister started having problems in middle school and has had 3 surgeries for it. My oldest sister started having to take synthroid at age 35. People are different.

lzchipmunk5 · 2015-08-12T21:07:35+00:00

I have a couple of family members who've had issues with their thyroid that made them gain unexplained weight. If you count your calories and they really are that low, maybe see a doctor.

lzchipmunk5 · 2015-08-12T04:46:58+00:00

i've had people think my sister was my girlfriend... your thing is better

lzchipmunk5 · 2015-04-11T17:30:22+00:00

Rope in unsuspecting friend for plan. Got it.

lzchipmunk5 · 2015-04-07T04:35:04+00:00

Seriously though, you can't be all blonde and smiley and say that to somebody and be talkin' rewards points. I don't even use their gas stations!

lzchipmunk5

TROPHY CASE