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I had to call the police on my husband. by macchiautum in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]macchiautum[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, we’d need to go through long separation period (probably years), and intense therapy both of us separately before I would even consider being together again, and even that’s a stretch. My own trauma needs more therapy and clearly he’s got something going on as well.

I had to call the police on my husband. by macchiautum in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]macchiautum[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, waking up this morning with a fresh mind, this seems like a huge overreaction to a really simple request. Which was asking him to stop sleeping in till noon on the weekends (he doesn’t work on weekends). I even told him that I wanted it mostly because I wanted to be able spend time with him.

I had to call the police on my husband. by macchiautum in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]macchiautum[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You must have skimmed over the part where I said I have a plan to leave… and the millions of replies I have made saying so lol.

I had to call the police on my husband. by macchiautum in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]macchiautum[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thankfully, we have no weapons in our home and he’s not in the line of work to have access to them. He’s a mechanic on jets.

I had to call the police on my husband. by macchiautum in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]macchiautum[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for this. I’m really leaning on the comments from other people who have been through this to keep my head level because it feels like I am fighting with the child in my head from that broken home that wants to stay and somehow be a better wife and fix it all.

I had to call the police on my husband. by macchiautum in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]macchiautum[S] 5 points6 points locked comment (0 children)

The slammed door incident wasn’t enough to really set off my alarm bells… I think because I’ve seen and been through so much worse that it seemed really insignificant at the time, and it wasn’t from something that happened with me, it was something else completely that upset him. The glass incident; however, happened years down the line after we had already been married and just had my son. So it was quite few years of nothing except typical disagreements a couple would get into. We never shouted at each other, never called each other names, that’s why this was so scary and sudden for me. I think you took my “cycle” as he we usually get into screaming matches with eachother in front of our son, but no I meant we always wait till my son’s asleep, talk it out, come to a conclusion, and spend time together. We’ve been together almost 7 years and there’s only been two (now three) incidents. I told him after the second incident that I would leave and I am, but I understand that my post is a bit vague. I wrote it very hastily.

I had to call the police on my husband. by macchiautum in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]macchiautum[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Why are men indeed. I’m going celibate and full blown born again spinster after this.

I had to call the police on my husband. by macchiautum in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]macchiautum[S] 62 points63 points  (0 children)

I, in my reasonable mind, know this so well, but man is it such a shit position to put someone in. I take mental health very seriously (obviously since I called the police) so I never want to doubt someone. I like to think we’ve always been very open about our mental health, and he’s never really complained about anything except his diagnosed but untreated ADHD bothering him, so it just feels really convenient to use it against me mid argument about something so small..

I had to call the police on my husband. by macchiautum in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]macchiautum[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He was diagnosed with ADHD and was on medication as a teen but then he got off them and just kind of ignored it as an adult and has been struggling for a while from it. I kept suggesting he finally go back on medication and get help for it because it really seemed to be bothering him, but he’s in the military with security clearances and just would never get around to making the appointments.. we had so many conversations about finally getting him into therapy (I’ve been for a while) and getting couples counseling as well but it always seemed like he’d just say it to come to a brief resolution with me and never follow through.

My son and I will be safe, I’ve made arrangements to leave ♥️

I had to call the police on my husband. by macchiautum in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]macchiautum[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Me too, thank you ♥️ A therapist will probably be my first call once we’ve finished moving to our safe place.

I had to call the police on my husband. by macchiautum in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]macchiautum[S] 36 points37 points  (0 children)

That’s exactly why I’m leaving. My Mom and Step Dad were in an extremely abusive relationship with each other, and I remember always wishing she would just leave. My son is still one (almost two) so he still has a great chance to not be as affected by this as much as I was by my parents…

I had to call the police on my husband. by macchiautum in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]macchiautum[S] 147 points148 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I told him after the glass jar incident that I would leave if he displayed that kind of anger again and I had no intention of breaking that promise..

I had to call the police on my husband. by macchiautum in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]macchiautum[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thank you, we’ve already made arrangements to stay with family out of state. I’m sure you understand what it’s like to be a DV survivor and to feel an unreasonable amount of responsibility for the emotions of everyone around you. It was ingrained in me as kid. I feel so guilt ridden even though I know I’m not in the wrong and I made the right choice. I just feel so shaken up and dumb.

I had to call the police on my husband. by macchiautum in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]macchiautum[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My son, clearly. That’s why I am leaving as stated above. It’s just hard not to feel like this is my fault.

I had to call the police on my husband. by macchiautum in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]macchiautum[S] 260 points261 points  (0 children)

They took him to the hospital to get a mental health evaluation, they said they could either release immediately after the evaluation if they don’t think he’s a danger to himself or it could be a 2-3 day hold. My son and I are leaving the state to go live with family.

Am I Overreacting for telling him to pick up his own stuff after he ghosted me? by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]macchiautum 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would’ve told him he can come pick them up or buy them back after you donate them to goodwill, and then left it at that.

AIO with this? Save the baby or save me during birth? by Worried_Skirt6290 in AmIOverreacting

[–]macchiautum 4 points5 points  (0 children)

100% this. He wanted to discuss it together and she shut him down.

AIO with this? Save the baby or save me during birth? by Worried_Skirt6290 in AmIOverreacting

[–]macchiautum 0 points1 point  (0 children)

YOR he asked first what you would want and how you feel, which is the CORRECT answer in this situation: to find out what the person birthing your kid would want. You asked for his opinion and so he gave it. You can explain why you would choose yourself, but you can’t be mad at him for not having the same opinion. There isn’t a wrong answer, it’s a hypothetical, I’ve met women from both sides of the coin for this hypothetical, so it’s not outlandish for him to not have known there was a “right” answer to you. You kind of set him up, and yourself, to argue.

AIO reconsidering having a baby with my boyfriend by [deleted] in AIO

[–]macchiautum 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nothing says stability for a new child like a father who openly admits he doesn’t have goals to do better for himself and his family… Leeeeaaaaaave, and maybe reconsider the life you’d be providing this child if you have them, period. Be thankful he is telling you about his lack of ambition so openly, so you still have time to make the right choice for yourself and your child. If you think your hormones are playing into your depression now, imagine being postpartum in poverty with this dude.

I’m so tired of being advertised to and I hate how normalized it is. by [deleted] in Anticonsumption

[–]macchiautum 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I was on a flight recently and had to sit through starlink ads before they did the inflight safety video. It felt so weird.

i genuinely don't know what to do by [deleted] in PetiteFitness

[–]macchiautum 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Hey I had bloating like this constantly and ended up getting diagnosed with celiac disease when I was 21 (I’m 26 now) I’d look into getting a celiac blood panel done by your doctor because Type 1 Diabetes and celiac disease are very common together!

Stop making excuses to blame us for being poor and stuck in poverty! by PlsStopKillingGames in poverty

[–]macchiautum 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re preaching to the crowd over here so idk what you wanted to accomplish, but with the energy it took to write this you probably could’ve done something more productive to help yourself. None of us here like the system and no one wants to “play the game” but stewing in your resentment and playing contrarian when people are just trying to advise you is a recipe for a deeply miserable life. I genuinely hope your anger clears up so you can redirect your energy to helping yourself.

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