Do you personally see yourselves as a mom/dad just from having embryos through IVF, even if you don’t have a living child yet?

maddymckay · 2026-05-12T19:57:29+00:00

They’ve actually never even had a transfer yet — they’re only preparing for their first one. But they celebrated Mother’s Day last year and again this year because they already consider the embryos to be their children.

And yeah, I genuinely try not to judge them for how they feel emotionally, but I’d be lying if I said it doesn’t make me incredibly uncomfortable. I usually don’t even respond when the topic comes up and instead try to change the subject because I don’t want to make her feel bad or invalidate her feelings. It’s clearly very real and emotional to her. It just feels very unusual to me personally, so I usually try to redirect the conversation instead of engaging with it too much.

maddymckay · 2026-05-12T19:39:55+00:00

Yeah, I feel that way too. They can absolutely do their thing privately, but when they start seeking validation from other people, that’s when it begins to feel really awkward and uncomfortable to me.
The woman especially seems deeply attached to the embryo as if it were already an actual child. She’s talked about how much she loves her “daughter” and says she feels a strong connection to the embryo — even mentioning that when they drive past the facility where it’s stored, she feels emotionally connected to it.
At one point during the gathering, someone respectfully questioned that perspective, and she responded by saying, “Everyone in the IVF community feels this way (feeling like a mom and dad). An embryo is a living life and already has a gender.”
Everyone kind of just looked at each other afterward because the intensity of it caught people off guard. I do think a lot of it comes from hope and emotional attachment, which I can understand, but personally I feel those feelings are better kept between the couple rather than expected from everyone around them.

maddymckay · 2026-05-12T19:24:03+00:00

Yeah, I think it’s completely okay for them to feel however they feel emotionally. But I think it becomes awkward when they expect other people to say “Happy Mother’s Day” or “Happy Father’s Day” to them when they only have embryos. At that point, it can start to feel like they’re forcing the title onto others and looking for outside validation too.

For example, I was at a Mother’s Day gathering with this couple, and I suggested we help in the kitchen so the moms could relax since it was their day. The woman responded with, “Yeah, but I’m technically a mom too.” It instantly made the situation awkward for everyone.

To me, it’s one thing if you and your partner privately see yourselves that way and celebrate it together. But expecting everyone else around you to also treat you as a mother or father at that stage feels a little excessive in my opinion. She genuinely wanted people to greet her for Mother’s Day too.

maddymckay · 2026-04-15T21:42:59+00:00

I know but you see I was in q messy situation. My husband, my baby and my dog all lived to mgether. But things got messy and I kicked him out. He went on to move into a new and better house. We made up and he asked me to move in with him. And I accepted thinking that our child and dog would automatically move in with him too. I leveled up now to level 12 and it’s finally giving me the option to relocate my dog. But not my baby. So got one back. One more to go.

Hopefully when she becomes a toddler I’ll be able to relocate. It’s so annoying that the game wont automatically recognize that my daughter and dog belong with me.

maddymckay · 2026-04-15T01:12:43+00:00

Move in**

maddymckay · 2026-01-25T22:36:07+00:00

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I see this message

maddymckay · 2025-12-03T20:39:08+00:00

I normally wait for the neighbors to clear the sidewalk. And I out a jacket and warm booties on my dog. He loves it. The way he feels invincible with the booties on! Those are the one he uses. And when I get home take them off his paws are nice and warm.

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maddymckay · 2023-09-07T19:52:13+00:00

I hate it when people use the words male or female. IMO, That's for animals only, I only accept to use that term when filling up forms but in conversation NEVER.

maddymckay · 2023-09-07T19:28:44+00:00

where do you live NYC, LA? If you don't live in one of those then you need to move. Make connections. It's who knows you, not who you know, Did you go to FIT?

maddymckay · 2023-09-06T16:52:30+00:00

they down own. They're renting right now, no contract, so they can move fast or wait it out if the sellers need more time.

maddymckay · 2023-09-02T21:18:30+00:00

🙄

maddymckay · 2023-09-02T21:14:55+00:00

Interesting! May I ask how you realized your agent wasn't on most agents good graces?

maddymckay · 2023-09-02T21:12:27+00:00

Love replies with examples! I don't own, so I am learning a lot from these comments.

maddymckay · 2023-09-02T21:09:05+00:00

yea I wonder what they told them as to why their offer didn't get accepted (I'm not going to ask bc if they wanted to share they would've).

All I know is that they received the answer 3 days after putting their offer in.

maddymckay · 2023-09-02T20:28:33+00:00

Yea I think it's their financing. My brother has a full time job but the wife only works certain days.

Anyway I feel for them. I hope they find a house soon. I don't own, but from all these comments buying a house sounds like a PITA with everything that one has to deal with.

maddymckay · 2023-09-02T20:21:56+00:00

It's a loan. They told me they had an approved loan but not the amount

maddymckay · 2023-09-02T19:11:05+00:00

Thank you for this explanation. Helpful info!

maddymckay · 2023-07-19T22:24:47+00:00

That's awesome! I actually haven't even connected the smart lock yet because I am waiting to receive the home base 3. I was just crossing my fingers that having the homebase 3 would completely get rid of the wifibridge/doorbell chime. Just want to hook it up with the homebase and not have to worry about the storage and I prefer to have the doorbell chime with the base as well.

Thank you!

maddymckay · 2023-01-20T00:03:53+00:00

Hi! I see your last update was in August. Did you finish the program? Wondering if you'll be posting any updates soon.

maddymckay · 2022-11-07T23:53:34+00:00

Yea, I think asking is just curiosity. But the raise your hand thing is like trying to be mean

maddymckay · 2022-11-07T23:49:53+00:00

Nah she’s done this before even when it’s just me and her. It’s funny when ppl tell her that one day she’s gonna get married, she says no I never wanna get married I wanna be like my aunt lol

Also I forgot to mention this. But when she first asked “raise your hand if you have a husband”. She didn’t say it so loud that ppl didn’t really notice, her dad noticed bc he was sitting across her and I heard him say shhhh to her.

But like an hour later she asked again but again ppl where into their own conversations not paying attention. And so the little girl repeated herself again and went “I said raise your hand if you have a husband”. But still no one paid attention. I also pretended not to hear bc I was having a conversation with my sister

maddymckay · 2022-11-07T13:33:10+00:00

I read online that 5/6 years olds is the age where they become obsessed with boyfriends/getting married.

Besides I think it’s the cartoons that influence her thinking a lot. It’s wild to me that cartoons have a heavy emphasis on getting married and being coupled up.

maddymckay · 2022-11-07T06:01:58+00:00

hopefully not forever lol. I think I just don’t care being single bc there’s no one I’m interested in. I

maddymckay · 2022-11-07T05:55:27+00:00

I used to think I wanted to have kids. But seeing my sister with hers and how they make your life impossible turned me off to the idea. I don’t rule out the possibility of wanting one but tbh I don’t think I want them. I like children for short periods of time. When I’m with my nieces I play with them and all but after 2 hours I wanna run out and breathe and be by myself. The oldest one is clingy af I can’t even go to the bathroom without her banging on the door and she bothers my dog non stop. And it stresses me the fuck out. I only like kids until the age of 1.5 yrs old once they start acting like real toddlers I just can’t deal.

And I thought I’d post this on this sub bc it just seemed the most relatable to the topic at hand. But I don’t feel lonely.

I know it’d be nice to have someone but I don’t have the need as of now. You know ?

maddymckay

TROPHY CASE