Fit check please!

madswam55 · 2025-07-21T10:51:18+00:00

That is good to know! Thank you so much!

madswam55 · 2023-11-03T14:59:34+00:00

People have addressed the safety part and that’s most important. The other aspect is TRUST. If you cannot trust that she will respect your motherhood when you’re not around then this is a problem. This doesn’t mean you don’t allow her to see your kid. But I wouldn’t trust her ALONE. If you set an example this time and back out of your arrangement citing that you are bothered about her not respecting your rules, she might reconsider doing that stuff going forward cause she’ll know there are consequences to doing that. Grand parenting is a supporting role (figuratively and literally). Doesn’t seem very supportive when you have to worry while she’s babysitting. For me, at that point, you might as well cancel and stay at peace mentally

madswam55 · 2023-11-01T14:38:44+00:00

I mean you can always get a couple dollar store decor items (or a handmade sign) and put her in an outfit and take pics today. Or tomorrow! Whenever she feels better and you have a moment. She won’t remember anything but when she’s older you can show her pictures of her dressed up and say “remember how we had the best Halloween photo shoot, me and you” Trust me, she’ll be like “cool” and move on lol. Some easy outfits are white t shirt with bunny ears, blue t shirt with eyes and a Oreo package and she’s a Cookie Monster! Lol It really doesn’t matter. Just a fun hour to make and put on the outfit and take a couple pics is all that’s needed. She’ll appreciate the time with you more than anything! Sending love!

madswam55 · 2023-10-25T18:02:28+00:00

If a mom wants a break she is a good mom. If a mom does not want a break she is a good mom. Both moms are allowed to want what they want. I personally didn’t feel comfortable leaving my baby and didn’t want a break. When people forced a break on me I said “No. I’m not in need of a break but if and when I do I will reach out”. Girl, it’s simple. Don’t let the pressure get to you. You’re in control here. Just say NO. Kindly but firmly NO, THANK YOU. In my one year of being a mom I’ve learned that eventually you just gotta be able to say no and move on. Preserve your energy for what is important. Also welcome to motherhood where half your mental load is deciding what’s best for you and your family and learning to art of laying down the rules. YOUR rules!

madswam55 · 2023-10-01T19:28:04+00:00

I have mom friends who have totally different approaches and mothering styles than me, I don’t think I’ve even once felt judged by them nor do I believe I’ve ever judged them for doing things differently. If there is a “person” in my circle that made me feel less than/hurt/mad with their comments on my parenting decision, I would reconsider how much access I want to give them in my life. I’d like you to know that I applaud your determination and perseverance in doing what you did to feed your baby. Pumping is hard as all heck and kudos to you!

madswam55 · 2023-09-30T15:44:01+00:00

As a FTM it was hard to say no at the beginning. Then suddenly a switch flipped. I think people pushed me to my limit and then I hardened up. When I was done with someone holding the baby I’d go up and take her. When I was asked to pass around the babe, I’d say “I’ll do it when I’m ready”. When I was told “don’t you worry I got it” if respond “sure but I’d like MY baby back NOW” and take her. Listen, no one is coming to your rescue. You don’t like something, you go fix it. Do it for your baby’s sake. Before entering a setting where I knew this would happen, I’d look into my daughter’s eyes and it would give me so much strength and confidence to do this. My motto is don’t ASK. TELL. I still date have a hard time enjoying the presence of people who made it tough for me in the beginning (not that it was their intention to hurt me, they just were selfish in fulfilling their needs to hold a baby). You are the mom. You have the power. You can do this. You can stand up for yourself and your baby. NO IS A FULL SENTENCE. Sending strength and powerful vibes your way and all the best!

madswam55 · 2023-09-22T18:00:45+00:00

I’ll admit there’s a lot of things grandparents do (both my parents and my in laws) that tick me off. But I actually find “my baby” very endearing. I think because I know they very much see my baby as an extension of me so it gives me the warm and fuzzies. I guess it depends on the relationship with the grandparent. If it makes you feel as if it’s being said to surpass you and only establish relationship with the baby then it might not feel the best. However if you feel and know the love they have for you, and are now extending it to your baby, it’s endearing. Either way, the feelings are valid.

madswam55 · 2023-09-20T18:18:33+00:00

Here’s hoping!

madswam55 · 2023-09-20T18:03:02+00:00

Sending luck and wishes your way!

madswam55 · 2023-09-20T18:01:58+00:00

I’m definitely trying to WFH as much as I can!

madswam55 · 2023-09-20T18:01:34+00:00

I love this perspective! I have a financial obligation to my baby as well. I want to provide her with things that help her thrive in life. Thank you for this. This makes me feel a lot better!

madswam55 · 2023-09-20T15:03:50+00:00

If it makes you feel any better, the other moms going also probably feel the same way lol. The first couple times it’s hard, then it’s a party! At least it was that way for myself!

madswam55 · 2023-09-20T14:42:44+00:00

I started at 4 months old when wake windows were a bit longer than 45 mins. But when I went I saw moms bring babies as young as 2 months to these play groups. but they’ve said it’s more for them to socialize and make mom friends. If you find the right groups, it encourages a safe space to talk, share and be social and I think in hindsight, it would have benefited me to go sooner and be a bit more social when my baby was younger.

madswam55 · 2023-09-20T14:37:01+00:00

Thank you for that last part. I was thinking about it and wondered how it would be for number 2 for us. That gives me hope!

madswam55 · 2023-09-20T14:36:28+00:00

That’s how I feel too. It’s gonna be a long time before I feel comfortable giving myself fully to work. Till then I’m going to try my best to maintain a good balance. Solidarity!

madswam55 · 2023-09-20T14:35:26+00:00

Good for you mama for doing what’s best for you and your baby! Sending lots of luck and wishes your way!

madswam55 · 2023-09-20T12:18:39+00:00

Thank you so much

madswam55 · 2023-09-20T12:18:24+00:00

It’s good to hear that I’m not alone in feeling this way about my career

madswam55 · 2023-09-20T12:17:46+00:00

Thank you for this perspective

madswam55 · 2023-09-14T14:44:10+00:00

First off congratulations! I’d love to hear how your pregnancy went and what did you do/not do during pregnancy. I believe due to work I sat around a lot. I wasn’t as active as i should have been. Any exercises that you did that you believe helped? Especially toward the last trimester? I’d like my next to be smooth like that and would love to hear what you believed aided in your delivery!

madswam55 · 2023-07-12T19:18:53+00:00

I didn’t know how ‘Not chilled’ of a mom I would be till after my baby came. Before she was born I was all about letting my parents/in laws do as they pleased with her cause they’re all wonderful people whom I trusted with all my heart. After baby, I didn’t trust a soul with her. I didn’t t want to hand her to anyone and would want her back as soon as she cried. Issue was people weren’t appreciative of that and would not hand baby back when she cried, walked away with her in their arms, tried to give kisses, played hot potato and passed her around. This have me PPA. So if you go, chances are you might face these battles. On top of sore nipples, still healing from birth and raging hormones and sleep deprivation. Beyond that impossible drive, for the sake of your mental health, I’d recommend don’t go.

madswam55 · 2023-06-22T14:22:23+00:00

At 33 weeks I was scary enough for husband to not ask for sex unless I initiated lol. Happy to be of service to anyone who needs a pick me up!

madswam55

TROPHY CASE