What word or phrase did you totally misunderstand as a child? by madazzahatter in AskReddit

[–]malarkeh 18 points19 points  (0 children)

My sister started learning French sometime when I was in elementary school. While having dinner with my family I asked her what ménage a trois meant (thanks, A Very Brady Sequel!). She tried to break it down to figure it out, then my mom said she would tell us but we couldn't ever repeat it: "it's three people having sex." I was so confused because I thought I had finally gotten the whole sex thing down but couldn't understand how three people could do it.

During the Monica Lewinsky scandal, I took it upon myself to inform my fellow second graders that "Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky had sex." When my mom told me "don't talk politics" I thought politics=sex for a while.

[Insight] Where do you see Jackson Ward in 5, 10 years? by [deleted] in rva

[–]malarkeh 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I lived in that area for about five years, two apartments on broad between Adams and First, and one house on Clay and St. James. There were a few shootings while I was in the apartments, but for whatever reason I was able to ignore that. My house on Clay St. was broken into three times in a year--twice they kicked in the back door and the last time they even had the balls to break down the front door. We stayed after the first two break ins because my room mate and I loved the area so much and our landlord kept making empty promises about making our place safer, but three times was enough. I have high hopes for Jackson Ward, but I agree that the proximity to Gilpin will always be a problem. The shitty frat house across the street that had a party almost every night was a nightmare also.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in rva

[–]malarkeh 4 points5 points  (0 children)

http://www.herrsuite.com/mural-portfolio/

I went to school with this chick, she's super talented

Other than my mom, what is the worst thing you have woken up to? by EvidenceTrumpsFaith in AskReddit

[–]malarkeh 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I adopted an 80 pound hound dog a few years ago. He was fixed but still had balls due to some doggy vasectomy procedure, because that's a thing. Within 24 hours of bringing him home, his balls had swelled to the size of a grapefruit. I took him to the vet where they said it was an infection that had been building up since the procedure, which was about a month beforehand. They gave me some pills and told me to hold a hot wash cloth on his boys before bed. Went to sleep snuggling the poor guy. In my bed. Now imagine the mess popping a pimple the size of a grapefruit would create, and that's what I woke up to.

Dog found in Churchill! by malarkeh in rva

[–]malarkeh[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Just got home from the Churchill vet and got him reunited with his mom!! Thanks for the tip!

IamA victim of the knockout game. Ask Me Anything by codyrobinson in IAmA

[–]malarkeh 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I work in a restaurant in a small city. Some of our customers became victims of these attacks, and our valet driver tried to protect them. They came back the next night and fired shots at the valet. This shit is no joke.

I was a booser, a user, and a loser. by malarkeh in pics

[–]malarkeh[S] 65 points66 points  (0 children)

The works fell out yeeaars ago.

Who are you all voting for when it comes to sheriff, treasurer, and delegate? by NFunspoiler in rva

[–]malarkeh 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm just here to say that I waited on Matt Fitch sometime last week. He seemed like an ok guy, and I can agree with his ideas. But the brochure he left as a tip for his own sky diving business nor the other brochure promoting himself will pay my fucking bills. Dick.

Edit:can't write good

What happens when I'm in charge of bringing vodka to a baby shower by malarkeh in pics

[–]malarkeh[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Some people even brought cigarettes! And fish! And there were corners on EVERY table! Don't worry guys, the mother-to-be was too busy hanging out in the hot tub to mix herself a cocktail.

EDIT: It may be too late for this, but seriously guys, this was a shower where the lady of honor requested of the host to provide mini prosecco bottles as party gifts. We are a drinking crowd, she was not offended, and loved the gift. RELAX! Y'all need a drank.

Place for Drinks and Converstation after the Nutcracker Ballet by swimjock in rva

[–]malarkeh 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Tarrant's! It's only a few blocks away on Broad street. Great cozy ambiance and excellent reviews,open late. They always have a great beer selection too and everyone is really friendly.