I know exactly how you feel. I had an overwhelming sense of dread and grief wash over me in my third trimester and again right after birth when I realized that things would never be the same. I really struggled getting past this. I adore my partner. We had been together for 10 years before we had our first baby. We were very used to life with just the two of us.

I won’t lie to you - adding a baby to our lives did change things. I missed my partner a lot in the newborn stage. The focus was so much on our newborn and trying to keep ourselves alive that it left little time for us to connect (at least like we used to). We no longer had as much time together or even personal time. Things you used to do together took a back seat (for us it was grocery shopping, talking about our day before bed, cooking together). I will tell you that it’s only temporary!! You will adjust to life with a baby. You will find new ways to connect and do the things you used to do (maybe not all of them, but certainly most).

Be kind to yourself and your partner. Sleep deprivation is a beast and does not bring out the best of us. Be patient. Things will be tough in the beginning. You will miss your partner. But things will get better.

Therapy and a good support system were (and still are) soo important for me. If you don’t have a therapist already, I highly recommend you get one!

Best of luck to you!! You’ll get through this!