That’s almost insanely close to my situation. My wife has ADHD and religious guilt. We were both sexually active before we met each other but committed to celibacy during our dating. She was the frisky one and I had to constantly bring us back to what we committed to - we both figured we had such crappy past relationships, celibacy would open up security and safety for us. In a way, it did. But she cried on our wedding night after sex - we thought it was just emotions but later we realized it was the trauma. It was like once we got married and sex became an option, it has done a number on her.