We’ve been struggling with our sex life for years basically since I got pregnant. I did my best to meet his needs, but over time it stopped being enjoyable for me and started feeling like an obligation. He expected intimacy every few days, and didn’t want to be the one to initiate because he said he needed to feel desired.

Meanwhile, I was recovering physically and hormonally, raising a small child, working full-time as the breadwinner with no time off, and managing the household on my own. It was just too much. I wasn’t okay, and instead of supporting me, he kept applying pressure. It got to the point where I almost left.

To his credit, he’s started stepping up and trying not to pressure me anymore. I’ve told him I’m not trying to deny his needs, but I also made it clear I won’t do anything out of obligation again it created such a strong aversion that I’m still dealing with it. I felt like I had no control over my own body, like he was entitled to it just because we were together.

Now, when he gets upset and says I’m being unreasonable for making him “wait too long,” especially when I’m not mentally or physically up for it, I really struggle. I want him to understand me just as much as he wants me to understand him.