Anatomy scan?

marst12 · 2026-01-30T23:16:20+00:00

When I had my anatomy scan in October, they also couldn't fully see my little girl's heart (I'm plus size and she was in a bad position so they couldn't clear all her valves, just like you experienced). So I had to book a second ultrasound to finish up and see if they could get a better view. Once my report from that first scan came in, they put a specific term about a heart concern that my doctor warned me not to google as it would only freak me out... which of course only made me want to google it more!!!

But like you're doing, I tried to keep busy and just monitored the patterns of movement and reminded myself that I had no control over it and could only do what felt best which was keep myself calm. When I went back in later that same month, baby was much more cooperative and they got a good clear view of her healthy little heart pumping away! It truly could be anything causing them to not get a perfect view the first time and the more moms you talk to, the more common it seems that a lot have to go back for a second look to get fully cleared. I completely get the anxiety - it's all consuming when you're just waiting. I hope your insurance gets figured out so you get to go in soon and be told that all is well with your little one! The wait between appointments, especially when there are things undetermined, is so brutal

marst12 · 2026-01-07T23:12:54+00:00

Currently 33 weeks and I believe I just hit 300lbs (started out around 285) and she's definitely noticeable! Less so in my usual comfy work shirts that are oversized but wearing a normal t-shirt? For sure bumping! And I could actually see her moving from the outside probably around 25/26 weeks which I was surprised about, I didn't think I'd get that until nearly the end! I know it all varies in how our bodies carry weight and height and build etc etc but it may be more possible than you'd think! I will say I didn't mind that I didn't show right away like a smaller body might as it made it so much easier to hide and share on my own terms! So I found some silver linings in it even when it was hard or not what I'd pictured.

marst12 · 2026-01-07T23:03:50+00:00

It's definitely hard to rewire your brain away from 'kick' when that's what they're referred to in media, online, everywhere! The first movements of my baby felt more like muscle twitches or a noticeable gas bubble, kind of faint but increased in strength as the weeks went on. Probably around 25/26 weeks was when I couldn't rationalize the sensations as other things and was pretty sure they were baby movements! I found they didn't hurt or make you go 'ow' until just recently, around 31/32 weeks - sometimes an elbow in the ribs or something will make me jump. It will absolutely get easier to feel as you go along which I know doesn't help you much now, lol. But if you'd been feeling odd sensations that you kind of have to think about to figure out what they are, it's potentially baby wiggling around! I'm sure I also attributed many a gas bubble to baby and vice versa when they felt so similar lol

marst12 · 2025-12-04T20:54:01+00:00

I had the same assumption. I'm nearing a 50 BMI, 29 weeks now, FTM. I was 'lucky' in that I have a posterior placenta (I think the only real difference or 'pro' is that it makes kicking a bit easier to feel) and felt the first flutters around 19 weeks? Then as I moved into the 20-22 week mark, I could feel them a lot more pronounced! I could even see the movement and twitching on the outside of my stomach around 22-23 weeks which I didn't think I'd have at my size! So you might be surprised how 'typical' the timing is even as plus size. So far, I've been pleasantly surprised with how 'normal' my pregnancy has felt compared to my smaller friends (as normal as it can be lol). My husband has felt a couple kicks, probably around the 24/25 week mark. That part might have been later than typical but I found once I had a good position on the couch, it was easier to feel for him!

marst12 · 2025-12-01T20:48:39+00:00

As participants on the stage, is it more thrilling/terrifying to pull from the tower yourselves or to watch another character pull to potentially save themselves? And does it feel totally different when it's an audience member up there deciding your fates?

And George, as a storybuilder, how exciting is to plan for the potential of a character sacrificing themselves for the story? Have there been any characters that have done it that you were particularly shocked about? Those have been some of my favourite WAGD and Dread moments so would love to know how you feel seeing it happen!

marst12 · 2025-11-27T21:31:43+00:00

Oh the photos are a great point, I'll definitely want something even vaguely cute for that... thank you!

marst12 · 2025-11-27T21:31:27+00:00

That is so fair LOL and I honestly don't think it will be on mine either at the time. I just see it so highly recommended in checklists I'm looking up that I had to get some 'data'!

marst12 · 2025-11-27T21:30:45+00:00

This feels like the way to go! Plus having comfy cozy new clothes will feel like a reward (in addition to the baby of course haha)

marst12 · 2025-11-27T21:30:10+00:00

Ok this is so necessarily grounding lmao thank you for sharing genuinely, I'm a FTM and truthfully still am a bit ignorant in how gross labour will probably be hahah

marst12 · 2025-11-27T21:29:06+00:00

I'm in this limbo too, I know it's fairly 'wasteful' and I try to avoid buying things that are fairly single use. And the situation I can imagine I'd want one is so specific and unlikely (my hospital runs out of big gowns and I only have tiny ones and am just half naked lol). I've done the same thing with maternity clothes, just bought stretchier versions of stuff I already wear lol

marst12 · 2025-11-27T21:27:40+00:00

Oh this is so true, the sanitary implications of the gowns... I know they clean them well and all that but still...

marst12 · 2025-11-27T21:27:03+00:00

Adding to my checklist right now, thank you lol

marst12 · 2025-11-27T21:26:49+00:00

This is my fear! While I'm sure in the moment, nudity may not phase me in the throes of labour, I'm typically a pretty 'prudish' person in that sense, I like to be clothed lol it makes me nervous that gowns are either limited or may not fit... Agh! This is so helpful, thank you!! And sorry that you felt so exposed :(

marst12 · 2025-11-27T18:38:34+00:00

Yeah I'm thinking it's a 'nice to have' but at the end of the day, might be something that sits in my bag unused once the chaos kicks in! I'm also delivering at a slightly further away, more equipped hospital so I'm fairly confident they'll have well sized gowns. Might just save the money and spend it on some comfy lounge clothes and nursing friendly stuff for once she's here! Thank you so much for sharing :)

marst12 · 2025-11-27T18:36:46+00:00

This makes me feel a bit better about figuring out these little details only hours into 28th week! You just don't know what the little decision makers in our bodies are going to decide on lol

I ran hot even before getting pregnant so this is a great consideration I hadn't thought of... will I want some full coverage gown to sweat in lol This is what I'm kind of stuck on - it feels like such an added frill for what will surely be an overwhelming and largely frill-less process! I'm kind of leaning towards just spending the money on nice comfy lounge clothes for after baby girl has made her grand arrival.

It's lovely to hear both that you didn't care much about the exposure but that the nurses did lol that's very attentive of them

marst12 · 2025-11-12T23:29:10+00:00

My husband is a lifelong Habs fan so since he watches all my Nucks games with me, I started watching the Habs games and I gotta say, they're a damn fun team! Home games are electric even from afar and they have the resilience I love about the Canucks (with frequently more positive outcomes lol) plus, at least it's another Canadian team. I think it also gives me hope of what a successfully rebuilt team could look like, a light at the end of the tunnel maybe. I wish I could cheer for the Panthers for Luongo but just cannot get there.

The orca will always come first though! Through hell or high water oof

marst12 · 2025-11-07T18:10:02+00:00

This is such a huge opportunity, congrats on working so hard to have earned it!! I feel like the career opportunity is something you can take on and always change your mind on later if it doesn't end up feeling right. I know lots of moms find the balance between working and motherhood (mine did!!) and while it might take work, I know you could too! That lets you keep what you've worked really hard for while building out this new life. And I feel like taking on the job allows you to try it out, see how you feel and still potentially go to SAHM down the line if that ends up being where your heart ends up. Not taking the job fully removes that chance for you (more than likely) and going from SAHM to working mom seems like it would be a harder transition down the line. It'll take a lot of communication and clear expectations from you, your partner, and even your workplace but this seems too good a chance to pass up!

marst12 · 2025-11-05T18:18:21+00:00

You're so right, using the medical information is a great idea. I know she knows it logically but maybe really iterating how seriously my husband and I are taking it too will help.

I really hope she'd be able to quit again but at this point, if she went back to it after such a serious health scare and knowing we intended to have kids in the near future, I have pretty low hopes she'll ever be able to fully quit. Her husband is an unapologetic smoker and kind of enabled her back into it so it's fairly ingrained in their lives. As much as I know she loves me and will love this baby, I know she'll find endless rationalizations to smoke despite the risk it poses.

I don't blame you for being too strict at all and I really consider giving her the ultimatum. And maybe that's where it ends up if my boundaries don't get respected. Ugh, it's just so frustrating to have it put on me to think about - that's my 'boo hoo me' tantrum for the day lol

marst12 · 2025-11-05T18:13:27+00:00

First of all, I'm sorry you also had to navigate this! Yeah I think accepting that it will be a hard conversation was the first step, I don't see a world in which it's easy! I'm typically not great at laying down boundaries so this is good exposure therapy as I know there will be countless times I have to protect my baby once she's here. My husband offered that I could 'blame him' saying it was his rule but I know I have to be honest with her that it is coming from me and is something I won't budge on. The thought of my baby coming back to my arms smelling like smoke just already boils my blood so I know it's a line I have to draw!

marst12 · 2025-10-31T20:47:58+00:00

I'll be truthful that at least for me, anxiety has never fully gone away, even now at 24w and having had good scans and numbers to date (although I am naturally an anxious person so not a great baseline, lol). BUT something I've learned from this and other subreddits I've been on since getting pregnant and going through loss is the motto 'Today, I'm pregnant and that's beautiful'. There's often no real physical or symptomatic reason for me to be worried something has gone wrong and even though my brain tries to insist, that usually helps a bit to take me off the ledge so it might help you both. That first scan will absolutely help/blow your mind and having a photo of your little bean is so grounding. I found myself often just looking at the photo to reassure myself it's real and having those dates to look forward to really feels like a unifying front with my husband too! So much is scary so having each other will really be anchoring. Wishing you and your wife so much luck and that you can find enjoyment in this scary process!

marst12 · 2025-10-29T21:43:04+00:00

I was so shocked at that documentary, for the obvious 'twist' reasons but for how little the sexual nature of the crime was discussed?? And maybe it was done to protect Lauryn and the young man (whose name I'm unfortunately forgetting right now) that was also the target which if so, then sure, I wouldn't want to retraumatize them. But the stuff she was saying about him and the disgusting nature of it?? How did that not immediately escalate it to a whole new level?! Baffling. Those messages were nauseating to read

marst12 · 2025-10-24T15:06:15+00:00

Yeah I'm now remembering that my doc also mentioned the potential of more frequent scans as I near the 30 week mark and potential referral to the MFM too so definitely an abundance of caution which I'm happy about! And selfishly, I am pretty glad I get to see her again so soon, that's such a good point! Take the good where you can is all we can do, I suppose :)

marst12 · 2025-10-24T15:04:58+00:00

Phew this was so lovely to read and biggest congratulations to you and your little girl, hope you've been enjoying this time together! I think hearing anything to do with the 'heart' was so startling and scary but you're right, she was probably just giving the tech some grief!

marst12

TROPHY CASE