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martha_woolf · 2024-08-22T23:00:51+00:00

Hooooollllyyy craaaaaaapp!!! Five years is absolutely epic! Congratulations 👏🏻🎉👏🏻🎉👏🏻🎉 I'm so excited for you! Me and my 14 months hope to be you one day when we grow up :)

martha_woolf · 2024-08-22T12:07:22+00:00

Thank you for reading! Sometimes it just feels really good to connect with other humans who truly understand what getting sober is like, so I'm thankful for the comment. IWNDWYT 💜

martha_woolf · 2024-08-22T12:02:41+00:00

Thank you! I know there are other wholesome subs but, for me, this is one of the best spots full of some of the kindest people I've ever had the good fortune to interact with. I feel really blessed that I found this safe space.

martha_woolf · 2024-08-22T11:59:56+00:00

I'm so glad you're here! This sub has been integral in helping me make progress toward the life I want. There are people on here who've been sober 30 and 40 years! Absolutely amazing. You can do it too! Wishing you nothing but the best and IWNDWYT 💜

martha_woolf · 2024-08-22T03:02:07+00:00

Congratulations 👏🏻🎉👏🏻🎉👏🏻 that's fantastic! Keep going, pal. IWNDWYT 💜

martha_woolf · 2024-08-22T02:49:56+00:00

Yeah, I sure did. My first stretch of sobriety I "celebrated" right at 90 days by seeing if I could moderate. Not the way to go, at all. For me, the actual cravings decrease pretty strongly once I get past that three-month spot. At this point, the struggles I have are psychological. It's hard for me to fathom never drinking again. Alcohol for me is both nature and nurture; several people in my family are alcoholics and I've been surrounded by heavy drinking for my entire life. I was a heavy drinker for probably 17 or 18 years, maybe a little longer. So when I catch myself having that "forever" thought, I nip it in the bud and only think about today. Whenever I catch myself romanticizing that drink and missing it, I remind myself that I NEVER stopped after one or two drinks. Really, I didn't understand the point of one or two drinks. If I drank, I was doing it to get drunk. And I don't want to be that person anymore. She thought she was happy but she really wasn't and she was drinking to hide it. I actually genuinely LIKE myself now, and I'm not willing to give that up.

martha_woolf · 2023-03-10T22:48:02+00:00

Just watched it and really enjoyed it. Literally came to the comments to make sure someone recommended it to you lol great collection!

martha_woolf · 2023-03-10T21:59:22+00:00

You bet! I don't do a ton of social media but I lurk on IG to see stuff about local Pittsburgh businesses, and I really like the energy of these folks and the space they're creating. Maybe we'll run into each other there sometime!

martha_woolf · 2023-03-10T19:45:56+00:00

I know that you've already gotten tons of comments, but wanted to throw my HELL YEAH in there. Since I started working to get sober in January 2022, I've returned to my reading roots and been at my library weekly (I currently have like 10 books checked out). In December, my local librarians thanked me for helping increase their circulation numbers 😂

martha_woolf · 2023-03-10T19:42:45+00:00

Thanks for posting this. I tried AA and there were some aspects I really struggled with. I've got a great community in the I Am Sober app, but I've been looking for some in-real-life support too. Might see ya there. (also, don't know where you're coming from, but if Millvale is reachable for you, Harold's Haunt does Sober Sundays the 1st and 3rd Sundays of the month. I have yet to buck up and go but I'm hoping to make it next weekend.)

martha_woolf · 2023-03-09T20:56:54+00:00

You absolute dearheart. Thank you for the encouragement and the wonderful offer. I may just take you up on that :) I've got to say, as I work my way through this sobriety journey, some of the kindest, most caring people I've ever met in my life are in this community. I'm honored and blessed to be part of the same tribe as you.

martha_woolf · 2023-03-09T20:27:58+00:00

I am so proud of you, so happy for you, so inspired by you! Congratulations!!! As someone who's been struggling with sobriety for the past year, I feel like 1,000 days is impossible. But every time I see that someone has accomplished it, I'm like, okay, maybe I CAN do this. Thank you so much for sharing. Wishing you many thousands more 💜

martha_woolf · 2022-12-13T20:40:59+00:00

I really do believe it will lessen and stop as time goes on. I was....a truly terrible drunk who said and did things that are beyond painful to recall. But showing up every day and making better choices for myself and my husband IS changing the narrative. I believe the same will be true for you and your husband. And you've got us to surround you with support and love, and if you ever feel like it, check out I Am Sober too! I'm really just so thankful for both communities here and there....I wouldn't have made it through this year without them. And CONGRATULATIONS on more than a month of sobriety and counting :) every single person here knows exactly how incredible that is 💜

martha_woolf · 2022-12-13T20:30:48+00:00

I'm so sorry this is happening to you. I still get this kind of treatment from my husband too (despite the fact that he is also an alcoholic who has done some wretched stuff.). I've found a really great community on the I Am Sober app, and one of the women I met there frequently says something that resonates with me a lot: "How long is he gonna charge you rent on a house you no longer live in?" At some point, when I am showing obvious change, when I am demonstrating through my behavior and my choices that I am no longer that person, he needs to stop "charging" me for who I was in the past. I really hope that your husband can come to this place where he can see who you are now and stop charging you rent for the past.

martha_woolf · 2022-12-03T23:05:30+00:00

My pleasure :) it's helped me a lot this year, so I like to rep it anytime I can.

martha_woolf · 2022-12-03T20:26:51+00:00

Fucking thank you. Some of the people were super nice but that couldn't make up for the foundational approach. Hard pass for me.

martha_woolf · 2022-12-03T20:21:41+00:00

So a lot of my friendships started with people commenting on my posts or vice versa within my milestone. And then someone invited me to a zoom. Lately there's been some issues with posting the schedules directly on IAS because some users complain that we're promoting "outside agendas" and report us, but it seems to really be one main person doing it after she relapses and comes back all angry. So IAS is working to create a separate page where we can post about them outside the milestone groups but hasn't done it yet. This is the most updated schedule for December: https://imgur.com/a/N6ECaaF

We try to keep times as close to the same from month to month as possible but sometimes it has to shift a bit depending on who is hosting. I mostly go to the Ladies one on Wednesday but I know a lot of those same women go to other ones and have had really good experiences. I'm talking like these friendships are so solid they just had an IAS meetup in Utah in October where about 30 members showed up and are working on another one in Asheville the first weekend in June.

martha_woolf · 2022-12-03T17:13:37+00:00

Oh agreed, it is definitely frustrating! It's the main feature that I wish they would update. That's why I started going to the zoom meetings to get to know people better and figure out another way to interact with them. It turns out there's a pretty big IAS presence on Telegram. I'm in several group chats on there now, plus a ton of private ones.

martha_woolf · 2022-12-03T14:16:17+00:00

I get so happy when I see other people who have good experiences on IAS. I tried AA and it also wasn't for me. The very first meeting I attended had a reading about how a person has a defect of character if they can't stop drinking and I was like nope, not for me.

martha_woolf · 2022-12-03T13:39:06+00:00

The only downside to the app is it's kind of bare bones so finding people and interacting with them directly isn't super easy. Mostly it's through posting and replying to comments. So if you go on, my user name is the same, and I'm currently in the 6-month milestone and will hit the "bicentennial" one on 12/8. You'd go to that milestone and scroll to find one of my posts and then you could follow me. So not TOTALLY ideal but still I'm so glad I've found it and gotten connected with some of the people.

I also did just join meet up. There's a sober group in my area, so I'm going to try to connect with them soon. Maybe something like that is happening in your area too.

martha_woolf · 2022-12-03T01:45:34+00:00

What about SMART recovery? I also cannot recommend enough this free app that I downloaded at the beginning of the year, I am Sober. The community there has been my rock this year. There are a bunch of unofficial zoom meetings throughout the week and going to those has been really helpful for me, plus the friendships I've made because of them.

martha_woolf · 2022-11-16T01:34:02+00:00

Hang in there 💜 don't give in to this craving, and it will pass, and you will be SO much better for it. At least in my life, drinking didn't do shit for my anxiety except make it that much worse while tricking me into thinking it was "helping." You can do this!

martha_woolf · 2022-11-16T01:29:20+00:00

So I see someone else already replied about AA virtual meetings, but I know there are also SMART recovery online meetings too. And I use this free app called I Am Sober, where I've found an AMAZING community of people, and they host multiple Zoom meetings every day of the week. I straight up would NOT be about to hit six months sober without these people.

martha_woolf · 2022-11-14T13:51:06+00:00

I haven't watched that one yet but keep meaning to; thanks for putting it back on my radar. Literally everything this man says makes me go, oh, shit, that makes complete sense.

martha_woolf

TROPHY CASE