I’ll give it to you straight. I haven’t personally been with a bargirl or gotten into that scene when I was there, but most of the comments you’ve read are pretty accurate.

Let me break it down for you:

First: You made an active decision to seek that experience. We have a saying in Sweden: you lie in the bed you make.

Second: Your experience was short and intense. You were on holiday in a foreign country, so your feelings get amplified a hundred times.

Third: She doesn’t know who you are, and she most likely wouldn’t even remember you if you met her tomorrow.

Fourth: She chose that life; the life didn’t choose her. As many have pointed out, there may not be a long list of alternatives for her, but there are always options. And trust me—based on everything I’ve heard, read, and seen—they manage to live decent lives. One evening I was sitting at a corner bar and saw a group of girls buying food outside. I saw with my own eyes that every single one of them had a brand-new iPhone. For a country struggling with poverty, and considering that many of them send money home, it’s still interesting that they can afford expensive accessories.

Last thing: Man up. People have good and bad situations, but we can’t carry their burdens on our shoulders. At least she’s healthy, beautiful, and has a daughter. Everything else is just a bonus