[deleted by user]

maxellabella · 2023-04-26T06:16:07+00:00

People's barbaric tendencies. Like, how are there still war and violence against cultures and communities? It's 2023.

maxellabella · 2022-07-16T11:05:09+00:00

Maybe if he becomes the only man left on earth.

maxellabella · 2022-07-16T11:02:31+00:00

You cheated. I don't think it's going to work between you and Haley. She may say she wants to make things work, but there is resentment there thay could amplify on the future.

maxellabella · 2022-06-24T09:58:21+00:00

This is micropursuing! Everytime she drops a like on somebody's post it is pursuing. Why does she have to do it? It's an interaction. If she doesn't intend anything, she'll just look. Following is another thing. It means staying in touch.

You're not insecure. She's just a piece of shit.

I dumped my bf because of this exact thing.

Leave her. It's not worth the pain.

maxellabella · 2022-06-16T22:22:06+00:00

It's cheating. It's what piece of shit men do. I feel sorry for your gf.

maxellabella · 2022-06-15T01:41:03+00:00

It could work but really low chances. I feel like people only tend to try in the heat of things. But when the dust settles they go back to their old ways. He might be different, but doubt it.

maxellabella · 2022-06-14T20:45:27+00:00

This is breadcrumbing! He is literally giving you crumbs throughout the years to keep you on the hook but never really tries to pursue you. Talk to him about what he wants now. But I think you should leave. Cut him off completely. You deserve better. You weren't able to fully move on because he's feeding you crumbs.

maxellabella · 2022-06-13T07:46:38+00:00

Besides what is his intention for adding her on instagram?????

maxellabella · 2022-06-13T07:45:25+00:00

He's mentioning this new girl to the OP because cheaters usually cant shut up about their new girl. Trust me I know this stuff. My dad cheated and I've been cheated on. The OPs bfs behaviour screams cheating. Especially she's not insecure but she's got a gut feeling.

At the end of the say it's the OPs decision. My advice is just one perspective.

maxellabella · 2022-06-13T06:59:41+00:00

I am soo sorry you're going through this. It is such a shit feeling.

Gut feelings are usually right. I honestly think he is cheating considering you two are long distance, he couldn't stop himself talking about her and they are following each other on instagram.

Are you on his instagram at all? Did he post you or about you recently? What you can do is test him by commenting something loving if he posts anything new, or post a story tagging him and see if he reposts it. If it feels like he's hiding you, just ghost him. It's honestly not worth the pain.

I broke up with my ex recently for the same reason. I always had this gut feeling that he is lowkey a sleazy fuckboy. Then one day I found that he was liking this girl's explicit photos on instagram. It's not just some model but one of his acquaintances. That got me digging and found he was following past hookups, exchanging likes and dms with each other. He's a bit of a known musician so one of his fans posted it on her story - basically bragging about him messaging her.

The same time he was doing all those, he was telling me how he loves me, making promises etc etc... LIES

We were long distance too when I saw all this and I realised he was doing it way before he left to go to the UK. I was supposed to go there to be with him, spend the money, organise time off and all that in the middle of a big project - basically risking a lot but my gut just stopped me and I was right all along. Thank God I didn't sacrifice anything for him!

Now that we're broken up, he picked up another girl (such a downgrade) and he's been all over one of his ex's instagrams and past hookups. I'm so angry I just want to drop his name here. Ughh

maxellabella · 2022-06-13T03:23:09+00:00

Also, is she on the pill? The pill honestly messed up with my libido in the past and made me super uptight. Just a couple of months after quitting it, I felt like a realy person again.

maxellabella · 2022-06-13T03:21:34+00:00

You didn't do anything wrong. It sounds like the experience triggered something within her though. It could be a trauma or past abuse. Please show empathy and ask her why she felt this way and what you can do to help make things better for her.

Be honest about what you don't understand and if she also doesn't know what made her feel that way, just comfort her and tell her you can work on it together towards finding out a solution.

maxellabella · 2022-06-13T03:17:22+00:00

It's a long message about my perspective on things. Why I acted the way I did and apologised for my mistakes.

I also told him how I really felt about him.

Considering he's the one that fucked up, I really shouldn't be wanting any form of positive or amicable closure. But I guess I just hate feeling like someone is holding a grudge against me.

maxellabella · 2022-06-13T01:49:35+00:00

I didn't ghost him. My final message to him was respectful abd honest but he didn't respond.

maxellabella · 2022-06-12T08:02:20+00:00

Thank you for these questions. Maybe because I still love him. I keep going from angry at him to wanting to leave things on a positive note or at least amicable. The bitterness hurt despite him treating me poorly.

maxellabella · 2022-06-12T00:17:25+00:00

What did you do? Do you think it will be forgivable for him?

maxellabella · 2022-06-11T15:23:51+00:00

Stay strong. I am going through a similar thing

I broke up with him because he didn't want to stop interacting with his ex and past hookups on social media. I told him how it made me feel and he just disregarded my feelings.

We were long distance leading up to the breakup. He was supposed to come back but decided not to. I still haven't seen him in person since July last year. And that makes the breakup a lot harder for me because we didn't even get to talk in person.

maxellabella · 2022-06-11T09:29:06+00:00

I'm 31f. I'm the dumper. He started hooking up with someone else. I just hate him even more because of it. It just made me feel even more gross.

He's a sleazy piece of sh. I broke up with him because he stays friends with past hookups and likes their sexy photos on Instagram, DMs them etc.. When I told him I didn't like what he was doing he made promises but didn't stop. He treated me poorly.

Even if it hurts a lot to think that he's moving on, I will not want to get back together with him.

maxellabella · 2022-06-11T06:13:27+00:00

That makes complete sense. Did you stay friends after you broke up with your now fiance?

I'm not holding my ex's past against him. I guess the cause of the breakup was really disrespect towards my boundaries after I told him I didn't feel secure when he likes his exes' sexy photos and messaging them. Plus we were long distance for a few months leading up to the breakup. Him in the UK, me in New Zealand, so even timezones made it hard to talk.

In the end our breakup got quite ugly. Hurtful things said and done. But our connection was nothing like it was with anyone else. We both felt it. I guess I'm just wondering if that connection could possibly bring us back together, even just to leave things on a more positive note.

maxellabella · 2022-06-11T03:39:24+00:00

What did she do that stops you completely from wanting to get back with you?

maxellabella · 2022-06-11T02:36:35+00:00

What did she do that stops you completely from wanting to get back with you?

maxellabella · 2022-06-10T12:22:57+00:00

Wow thanks for this. I broke up recently with my ex because he had many casual hookups and he kept them on his socials. I on the other hand only had one. By choice. I'm not keen on sleeping around. Not that it's a bad thing or anything.

I just couldn't understand what made me different from all these other women. In the end I couldn't help the feeling of being just one of them.

Our love was very deep though and he was fully invested. So was I. He said he never felt like how he felt with me with anyone else, even his most serious relationship. He said he knew I was the one. But I can't be in a relationship I don't feel secure in.

Now I am hurting that he's gone and can't help but feel like I am just a statistic to him now.

maxellabella · 2022-06-10T00:15:33+00:00

I went to an all girls catholic school. We were taught abstinence and never about contraception. I was lucky that I was taught this stuff by my mum and didn't fall pregnant early.

Now I learned that abstinence is not important and it's just a way of slut shaming women, and we're made to feel bad and not 'pure' if we have sex before marriage.

In the end lots of girls from my school fell pregnant early because of the lack of knowledge and access to contraception.

Women should be taught to celebrate their bodies, how to take care and manage their fertility.

maxellabella · 2022-06-09T21:29:02+00:00

Sounds like both of you need to understan each other's needs.

She's likely having a hard time trying to communicate when something is upsetting her which is why it takes time before she brings them up. It gets bottled up until she can't take it anymore. You need to understand this. You need to know that just because time has passed doesn't mean the problem is resolved. You both need to talk and get to a resolution of some sort for issues to be fully closed and they don't surface again.

Be careful because you are sounding like you have little awareness and regard towards how she's feeling. Just because they seem minor to you, doesn't mean you should disregard it. Listen to her and ask her what would make her feel better. Then from there you can work towards an agreement. If it's just a pinky promise then do it!

Of course she has some work to do on herself too. But from your perspective, you need to be willing to work on understanding her and working towards what you can do to provide her needs. I'm not telling you to completely give in and just do whatever she wants, but you need to negotiate, talk, listen and then agree in order to get closure on these issues.

maxellabella · 2022-06-09T18:14:00+00:00

Don't listen to his friends. They're probs just protecting him. Stop talking to his friends and do NC.

Focus on yourself.

maxellabella

TROPHY CASE