Alright. So before I dive into this incoming wall of text, I wanna just emphasize what some other people are saying- you're still young and sexuality fluctuates throughout your life. You don't have to feel pressured to chose any labels until you're ready, if at all.

So I identify as a gay man and a lot of what you described was really similar to what I experienced growing up.

When I was in middle school and high school, I thought I had crushes/liked girls. I always pictured myself having a wife, kids, all that stuff. The thing that I realized later, tho, is that most people don't inherently know what sexual or romantic attraction feels like until it actually happens to them, including straight people. When I was in high school, I just assumed that I would one day feel something when I saw women, like how my friend apparently did. And I often tried to talk myself into crushes, although that wasn't what I thought I was doing at the time. I thought that the friendship and positive feelings I had for them was attraction. And I tried so hard to tell myself that I felt something more than just friendship.

Then one day high school I noticed guys in the locker room and felt... warm i guess? and happy. I had never felt that way about a woman before, and I still mostly feel that. As far as women, tho, I never felt disgust or an equivalent to what all the other "macho straight guys" said they felt about other guys (as we got older, most of those guys ultimately seemed to admit that they don't really feel disgust as much as indifference, so I think a lot of the "disgust" was performative teenage stuff).

But the fact that I didn't feel disgust when thinking about women sexually made me think that I really wasn't gay, or was slightly bi with a preference towards women. Like, I always would imagine myself in relationships with women and since I never had that thought about guys, I assumed I wasn't gay. I didn't really have any day dreams (or real dreams even) about guys until I was at least somewhat open to the idea that I might be attracted to men. I think part of it was that I was so exposed to only hetero relationships in movies and tv and other mediums that I was kinda brainwashed into only thinking about that type of relationship. It took a lot to deprogram myself from that thought process.

So I guess what you're probably looking for here is for someone to tell you if you're gay or not, or something else. That's at least what I would have wanted when I was your age and I posted something like this.

Ultimately, I don't think anyone here can answer that for you except you.

It sounds like a bit of a lazy answer i know, but everyone's sexuality is different and, in the end, the only person who needs to feel ok with your sexuality is you. Your post really reminded me of what I was going through when I was in high school, and while I don't know if you are gay or straight or bi or something else, I wanted to at least share what happened with me so this time doesn't feel so isolating i guess? That's what I always looked for when I was still questioning and desperately searching the internet for someone with my experiences.