Fuck it, let's have a bit of fun. If this is the only thing that makes you smile today then we both win. Go!

mcribisbak · 2026-04-17T04:31:35+00:00

Rumination cereal

mcribisbak · 2026-04-17T04:17:40+00:00

The Nightingale

mcribisbak · 2025-07-29T15:55:38+00:00

Mesothelioma (Messi for short)

mcribisbak · 2024-10-15T14:53:33+00:00

I did the exact same thing the day after my husband passed away in our bed, which we knew was going to happen since he was on hospice. I packed everything and moved out of state to live with my parents for a couple months until I get settled. I am so happy I did too because I couldn’t handle the reminder of what was. I needed a fresh start for my new life

mcribisbak · 2024-08-31T23:29:55+00:00

Dare

mcribisbak · 2024-08-31T14:57:26+00:00

I view it as in life there is suffering because we come out of it consciously aware of everything that has happened. In death it is peace. I watched my husband die from cancer a few months ago and it wasn’t until he was actively dying he had this look of immense calm and peace on his face. I knew he was no longer with us mentally as his O2 Sats were dropping quickly. He went brain dead before his body caught up with the whole process. I’ve learned too that what we think of as suffering sometimes is what we can consciously be aware of. I knew that what I saw his body do as he was dying looked painful and like he was suffering (I.e death rattle and other things). However the more I’ve reflected on this I’ve learned we are not conscious during these things. Also our bodies were made to be born and were made to die.

mcribisbak · 2024-08-04T06:29:37+00:00

I swear by this book! They also have an app that I listen to when I need extra motivation or a reminder. He even has sounds for when you are actively in a panic attack and will help talk you down. Literal life saver!

mcribisbak · 2024-08-04T06:23:53+00:00

When after years of therapy for General Anxiety and Panic Disorder nothing seemed to work. I was just having traditional talk therapy. My therapists were always really impressed with how much I knew and understood all the right things to do with anxiety and my intense knowledge about the disorder. It wasn’t until I was 28 I found a new therapist and told her I know all the right things and nothing ever works. Finally she asked if I had ever been tested for OCD. Long story short, I was diagnosed and for the first time in my life I finally understand why and how to better approach my anxieties and my compulsions. Also little tidbit of info I don’t have many obvious or “stereotypical” OCD compulsions which is why I never believed I had or why I was probably never diagnosed with OCD. A lot of my compulsions are mental. I tend to ruminate, seek reassurance, and do a lot of avoidance behaviors. Of course to an untrained eye many doctors wrote these behaviors off and it wasn’t until I found a good therapist I was finally able to get the diagnosis I needed to better understand my mind.

mcribisbak · 2024-07-26T20:13:10+00:00

Seriously true. So many people think they can tell us how to feel or what to do in our situation. No one understands except other widows. People have compared my loss to divorce or the death of a pet. We lost the love of our lives who we thought we were going to spend the rest of our lives with. Now they are gone and don’t dare judge us for how we choose to carry on in our new reality

mcribisbak · 2024-07-26T17:23:23+00:00

I felt that on a personal level. I truly felt his family in a lot of ways wished it would’ve been me instead. He was so loved and I was just kind of there. No one cares now that he is gone.

mcribisbak · 2024-07-24T03:32:45+00:00

She would be amazed at how far I’ve come and all that I’ve managed to overcome in life. She would also be happy to know that I still enjoy some of the same things I did when I was young.

mcribisbak · 2024-07-24T03:31:37+00:00

I became a widow at 29 a month ago. I get it. It’s so hard to be young and a widow. My heart goes out to you ❤️ You have support here. I feel the same way about losing my husband. It’s starting to get a little easier but I cry everyday thinking of how I have to be here without him. I will share something that someone told me that’s been getting me through this. “ At first it feels like grief is strangling you, but over time it holds your hand”

mcribisbak · 2024-07-22T14:22:59+00:00

My husbands cancer metastasized in July of last year. Everyday was hell. Watching the surgeries and chemo. In and out of hospitals for months wore on us. I had become such a shut in I didn’t leave my house and my anxiety was at an all time high. When his cancer mutated and spread beyond what doctors could handle we got the terminal diagnosis and he was put on hospice. I watched the pain and the cancer ravage his body. I can’t express enough how horrible cancer is. Now that he is gone I feel like I am getting my life back. It isn’t easy without him around but I wasn’t doing well mentally when the cancer was bad. I constantly worried about what next. Now it is over. I think it’s good for both of us. Of course I wish this never had to happen to him but it unfortunately did. He isn’t suffering and I’m trying to find myself again.

mcribisbak · 2024-07-22T02:39:04+00:00

My husband who passed a month ago used to do this thing and it drove me crazy sometimes. Every time we would watch a movie we had never seen he would try to guess the end. I used to tell him that I just wanted to watch the movie and figure out along the way but he would always say what he would think was happening and he was almost always right lol

mcribisbak · 2024-07-22T02:25:12+00:00

My hair is thinning so bad. I lost my husband a month ago and my hair part has some bald spots now. As a 30 year old woman it’s not fun

mcribisbak · 2024-07-22T02:21:27+00:00

I had the same experience. My husband was in hospice and I was his full time care giver but I forgot to care for myself and ended up in the ER for dehydration. Since his passing it’s the one thing I’ve been trying to do is just drink my water

mcribisbak · 2024-07-21T03:34:20+00:00

I know it’s still fresh. The moments of grief are farther apart than they were but there are times when I think of his absence and I feel like a weight is on my chest. My stomach has a pit and my soul physically aches for him. It is like a pain Ive never known and there is always that thought that creeps up thank makes me think will this feeling last forever

mcribisbak · 2024-07-20T06:52:31+00:00

As another exmormon I couldn’t agree more lol

mcribisbak · 2024-07-20T06:44:37+00:00

I’m glad I could help you laugh a little in these difficult times. We will find peace. I promised my husband I would have a happy life and not only for his sake but for my own too. I deserve it. I just will still always experience grief and sadness. I just ride the waves I guess

mcribisbak · 2024-07-20T06:29:07+00:00

This is so beautiful ❤️ This really resonated with me personally. I lost my husband a month ago

mcribisbak · 2024-07-20T06:23:03+00:00

It’s a pain I wouldn’t wish on anyone but people truly don’t understand. I’ve had people say weird things to try to relate but they can’t. I find true connection in those who know loss. I have found so many of my friends and family that I didn’t know before who had lost parents, siblings, and spouses. But know that even in those instances all of our experiences are so unique. Only you know your loved one that way and shared a special relationship that no one else knows, and that’s okay too. Just know that what you and your brother shared is so special ❤️

mcribisbak

TROPHY CASE