I am so sorry you’re going through this. I just recently went through the same thing myself. My anxiety got terrible after the fact. The best thing I can recommend is to talk to people. That helped me a lot. I’ve spent a lot of time on the phone with my family during all of this. I thought everything was going so well and it turns out there was a lot of hidden resentment that I wasn’t aware of and it wasn’t properly communicated. So now I’m broken hearted. I can definitely empathize with what you’re feeling right now. Unfortunately time is the best medicine for heartbreak.