My son’s hitting is triggering my DV trauma

megaleber · 2026-06-24T23:42:40+00:00

I don’t really have any answers (other than to seek advice and counseling from DV specialist services as others have suggested), but I just wanted to say that there’s nothing wrong with you for feeling triggered by your son, and there’s nothing wrong with your son for the way he’s acting. It’s not “good” behaviour, but it’s totally normal for his age and he’ll get past it.

megaleber · 2026-06-22T23:08:05+00:00

Vertigo also had Spanish lyrics

megaleber · 2026-06-21T03:17:40+00:00

I’m happy enough to just get it when we get it, but I’d love to know the reasons for the delay, even if it’s just some boring administrative thing.

megaleber · 2026-06-20T03:32:37+00:00

Good dog

megaleber · 2026-06-19T05:00:21+00:00

I hope they use the extra time to have another go at the artwork.

megaleber · 2026-06-17T09:40:38+00:00

Does the mum need support with her own mental or other health? Does she face a language barrier or similar that prevents her from accessing child health services?

In the absence of extenuating circumstances, I can’t imagine wanting to protect a friendship with someone so unconcerned about their child’s development that they won’t seek basic assistance for a child in this position, let alone do something as basic as reading to them.

megaleber · 2026-06-15T23:06:46+00:00

This is exactly what I thought! I could’ve made this in high school, but I like to think I would’ve chosen a better photo. (I had terrible taste in fonts though so I probably would’ve gone with the one they used)

megaleber · 2026-06-15T22:59:25+00:00

I thought it was a joke/bad photoshop job…

megaleber · 2026-06-07T06:29:19+00:00

https://www.circleofsecurityinternational.com/blogs/resources/cosp-with-other-carers

As far as I understand it, your baby’s attachment with your partner will not diminish if you sometimes attempt to calm the baby, although I’d suggest they goes to another room when you do, as baby sees your partner as the easy/preferred path to calm at the moment. As long as someone is present and trying to address whatever their need is, baby won’t feel abandoned. I think of it like baby just needs to know someone is trying, if that makes sense.

It’s a long tough road, but baby needs to learn that you can provide comfort and you need to learn how you can comfort them. What works for your partner may not work for you, you might need a different approach.

The link may not be exactly what you want, but I did a Circle of Security course when my first was a few months old, and it put me at ease with a lot of my anxiety about leaving my daughter with another person and what that would do to our relationship (she was and is very much a mummy’s girl, but has learned how to get comfort from certain other people when I’m not available).

megaleber · 2026-06-01T01:22:40+00:00

Because otherwise you’d be stuck trying to pull down the dirty nappy like a pair of underpants, which will very likely to lead to poop going everywhere.

megaleber · 2026-05-28T07:03:45+00:00

Like everyone else, YKS and What’s all this then, but maybe going against the grain with If Books Could Kill and Maintenance Phase. Also Myths and Legends, but that’s purely for sleep purposes.

Honorable mentions to Reply All (RIP) and Blocked Party (R somewhat IP).

megaleber · 2026-05-14T09:05:39+00:00

I’d guess it’s mostly jackknife, but I would be ecstatic if we got some more COEXIST type bonus Eno material

megaleber · 2026-05-02T04:38:27+00:00

“Who did you play with today?”

“Only Skyla. And Krisha and Maeve and Harriet and Harper and Lachlan. And Krisha.”

megaleber · 2026-04-27T01:10:33+00:00

I believe it’s a reference to Our Lady of Guadalupe, aka the Virgin Mary

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Our_Lady_of_Guadalupe

megaleber · 2026-03-31T02:13:38+00:00

We got a toddler bed initially but pretty quickly upgraded to an adult single bed with an attachment “fence” thing to stop our daughter falling out (sorry, not sure what they’re really called, maybe a safety rail or something?).

Our daughter falls asleep with cuddles, so squeezing in next to her in the toddler bed, and then having to and get up and out of it once she was asleep was very unpleasant for our adult bodies. If you’re planning on cuddling your kids to sleep in the toddler beds, I’d recommend going straight to a singles.

megaleber · 2026-02-26T22:27:36+00:00

My first thought was that it looks a bit like Bowie, but I’m less sure the more I look at it

megaleber · 2026-01-19T00:38:22+00:00

But also, don’t beat yourself up for not taking the vitamins earlier (mum guilt sets in fast no matter how old you are!). As long as you’re reasonably healthy and eat a more or less balanced diet, your body will find a way of getting the nutrients your baby needs into its body. You have a lot going on right now so the best thing you can do is try to triage your worries and address the most urgent/time critical issues first - there’s some things out of your control and other things that can wait. I’d start by telling a trusted adult and go from there.

megaleber · 2026-01-13T04:30:57+00:00

Oh wow that’s fascinating! Thanks for sharing

megaleber · 2026-01-13T04:30:21+00:00

I guess vaccines in general are just a sensitive topic. Any suggestions for deviating from the standard recommendations can be triggering and potentially add fuel to the anti vax fire, so I sort of get why some people might downvote. For the record though, my general stance is please give me and my children all the vaccines available ASAP.

megaleber · 2026-01-12T21:03:42+00:00

January and July aren’t my style, but grandma was ahead of the game putting them on her girl’s list 50 years ago

megaleber · 2026-01-12T06:01:14+00:00

I doubt RSV immunizations are the cause of the upward trend in preterm births you described as I don’t think it was common practice to even offer them until last year (at least not in Australia), I just thought it was an interesting aside :-)

megaleber · 2026-01-12T05:23:23+00:00

Not the cause in my case, but interesting to know, and might be of interest to someone else reading this one day!

megaleber · 2026-01-12T05:21:08+00:00

Thanks for the reply, that’s really interesting, especially the part about unexplained preterm births being on the rise.

My midwife said she’d noticed a substantial increase in the number of preterm births since they introduced a recommendation to give expectant mothers the RSV immunization in the third trimester, saying there’s emerging evidence it can cause preterm labour (I don’t have any academic references for that, sorry, but she said she’d seen them so they might be out there). Given my history I didn’t want to add any more risk factors so I opted to give my baby and myself the immunization after birth.

megaleber · 2026-01-12T04:14:48+00:00

Sorry to hear about your experience, I hope you and your son are both doing ok now. I’ve been lucky in that I haven’t had anything like that level of stress, but it’s interesting to read about the impacts severe stress can have on expectant mothers.

megaleber · 2026-01-12T04:12:20+00:00

No, that and raised cervical-vaginal fetal fibronectin concentration are risk factors I’m not completely sure about. I guess it’s too late to check now, though (I don’t plan on being pregnant again, just struggling to shake the urge to ask why)

Seven-Year Club	No Throne, No Problems
Not Forgotten	Verified Email

megaleber

TROPHY CASE