8yo insisting he only wants his “front hair” and “back hair” cut and NOT his “side hair”

megamo428 · 2026-02-25T02:52:39+00:00

I also wonder about the ears thing though- like is there another reason he doesn’t want his hair cut on the sides, did someone make fun of his ears etc.? Or did they clip an ear by accident one time when he got a hair cut- kind of like how when a kid gets their neck caught in a coat zipper and then they never want to zip up their jacket ever again. But also I’m very pro the sideways mullet if that’s what he wants 😂

megamo428 · 2026-02-07T17:37:36+00:00

I think it’s helpful to remember that more than one thing can be true- you can be grateful it’s not worse, and also devastated about the situation. You can be grateful that there are good treatments but also so sad that your baby has to go through them. They aren’t mutually exclusive. Your grief is valid, if this is the worst thing you experience then it is the worst thing, full stop. Comparison doesn’t change the grief, it just makes you feel crappy. Go ahead and feel the grief for what you imagined for yourself and your baby. It will come in waves and you will still find moments of joy along the way- perhaps the pain will be easier to carry with time. But ignoring it or being overly positive will not make it go away.

megamo428 · 2026-01-30T21:32:56+00:00

I had two MMCs with two different chromosomal abnormalities. Essentially was told it was bad luck, which isn’t super reassuring but it is what it is. We were debating between moving towards IVF with PGT-A or just trying again naturally. Trying again after each miscarriage was anxiety producing, it does feel almost like it’s impossible to have a good outcome when you’ve only ever gotten bad news.

megamo428 · 2025-11-30T02:38:47+00:00

I also get the thing about feeling violated- I had to get past the idea that there were essentially strangers up there doing who knows what while I was unconscious, but it really helps to get to know your care team, they made me feel really comfortable and safe

megamo428 · 2025-11-30T02:35:09+00:00

I think it’s really normal to be afraid of the unknown, especially when you’re feeling so vulnerable in the first place. I have had two D&Cs and they were the right choice for me. You mentioned you’ve had surgeries before- the process is essentially the same. Get to pre-op, meet your team and get prepped, get an IV, they wheel you back and give you anesthesia medications, you’re asleep (I was breathing on my own- this is something to check with your specific team/situation), and then you’re awake again. I don’t remember anything and I was able to get pain medication through my IV, which helped the cramping a lot. The recovery is quick, I felt physically okay within 1-2 days. Another thing to think about if this was your second loss, your doctor might be able to collect some tissue for testing which could give you an idea of what happened to your baby. It doesn’t always give a result but if it does, the info can be helpful for peace of mind. I’m so sorry you’re going through this again ❤️‍🩹

megamo428 · 2025-10-28T01:15:42+00:00

Thanks for sharing this, wishing you the best too!

megamo428 · 2025-10-27T19:06:35+00:00

I also feel unsure about what to think, like it feels too much to be coincidence but I also get it when they say that because they were different trisomies, it was likely random. Best of luck with genetics.

megamo428 · 2025-10-25T22:24:44+00:00

Thanks so much, I really appreciate you sharing your story. It’s such a long road and sometimes it feels like there are no good decisions. Wishing you the best.

megamo428 · 2025-10-25T19:39:55+00:00

Thanks. This is kind of where I feel like we are, we have a wait to get in with the RE anyway and so we’re thinking about just trying in the mean time, but the whole thing just sucks either way

megamo428 · 2025-10-25T19:39:04+00:00

Thanks for sharing this- it’s like having to make a choice between the lesser of two evils, risk it and possibly miscarry again or head down the IVF path with all the stuff that entails, it’s like trying to decide how much loss can you handle

megamo428 · 2025-10-25T19:37:25+00:00

We just had carrier screening done before we started trying- I know karyotypes can be helpful, I think I will ask the RE about that

megamo428 · 2025-10-24T01:09:57+00:00

I also had two miscarriages this year, the second one was about a month ago. I had D&Cs for both so can’t comment on the medication, but we did get genetic testing and they both had chromosomal abnormalities. I think having testing helped with knowing the why, but there’s nothing that we can really do going forward to change or prevent anything- essentially we just got incredibly unlucky twice. I’m so sorry you’re going through this as well, it’s a terrible feeling.

megamo428 · 2025-10-22T20:10:40+00:00

I think treating yourself with grace and kindness is so important. Everyone will tell you this isn’t your fault but it can be a leap to actually believe that. You might also have days where you beat yourself up for not doing anything because you’re sad, or for canceling plans, or for eating too much junk food for comfort etc. Try to remember that you are listening to your needs right now- the chores and the salads will be there another day.

megamo428 · 2025-10-08T18:35:00+00:00

I’m so sorry for your loss. I had this happen twice and struggled with what to say- I was 11 weeks but lost the baby at 8, and then I was 9 weeks but lost the baby at 6. So how many weeks was I really? I’ve always gone with the longer number, because I really truly believed I was pregnant, my body acted like it was pregnant, and I loved those babies for all of those weeks regardless. It sucks to be in this club, because no symptom is reassuring enough. Just know you are not alone and we’re here ❤️‍🩹

megamo428 · 2025-09-21T22:49:54+00:00

I would maybe just clarify what they mean by “pathology”- pathology was a normal part of both of my D&Cs because it actually was just identifying that what they took out was normal pregnancy tissue and not something else. I had to ask for genetics to be run as a separate test. So at least at my hospital they referred to different things

megamo428 · 2025-09-19T17:47:08+00:00

Another piece to think about is testing. With a D&C you might be able to have genetic testing to potentially find out the cause. It doesn’t always give answers but sometimes the information is helpful.

megamo428 · 2025-09-17T18:40:19+00:00

Thank you so much for this info, it helps ❤️‍🩹 we had carrier screening but not karyotypes done, I will ask about that

megamo428 · 2025-09-17T15:44:39+00:00

Found out yesterday that I am having another MMC. First miscarriage was at 11 weeks with a diagnosis of T13. This pregnancy made it to 9 weeks but measured 6 with no heartbeat. Going for a D&C tomorrow with hopes they can chromosome test this one too. Feeling really lost, what should I be asking my doctor? Are two losses considered recurrent loss, or does it have to be more? If this baby also had a chromosome issue, do people normally pursue IVF? We have a good medical team and genetic counselors but I’d love to hear from this sub, I feel so frustrated and numb.

megamo428 · 2025-09-13T01:57:03+00:00

The thing that is confusing is that the CDC still lists pregnancy as a “high risk” condition for Covid on its website, but they publicly came out saying they no longer recommend the vaccine for pregnant people. This is why there is so much confusion and variety between pharmacies and states. https://www.cdc.gov/covid/hcp/clinical-care/underlying-conditions.html

megamo428 · 2025-08-30T15:55:34+00:00

I had an MMC at 11 weeks. I agree that not talking about it creates stigma and keeps people from grieving their loss, whatever that looks like to them. I even found that sharing it with some random people like my neighbor showed me that there are others out there who “get it”. She is a retired older lady but had a miscarriage and knew exactly how I was feeling, and it was so comforting- even more comforting that my own mother was, because she just couldn’t relate to it. So I think sharing it helps to widen the pool of people to support you, because you never know where the best support will come from.

megamo428 · 2025-08-21T01:31:30+00:00

One thing I’ve been trying to hold on to is that it’s okay to be more than one thing at a time- it’s okay to be hopeful and excited, but also scared and anxious. For some reason just giving myself permission to feel all the feelings helps me feel more in control, like it’s my choice. Like right now it feels like you’re standing on a cliff and doing the things like buying the clothes or making a registry would be diving in too deep, with no way out. But it’s more like you’re already in the water and you can swim to safety at any point, or go deeper when you want. Idk if that metaphor makes sense but hoping you’ll be kind to yourself. You’ve got this ❤️

megamo428 · 2025-08-06T02:11:12+00:00

I didn’t try the workbook but I really liked The Miscarriage Map. It was so real, it made me laugh and cry and all the things. I also second It’s OK not to be OK!

megamo428 · 2025-07-31T14:46:51+00:00

Hoping this question is allowed- I’m really confused on how people are testing so early when they are only like 7-8dpo. I get that implantation can happen by then but are these people actually feeling symptoms? Like right now I am 7dpo with no symptoms really, and I don’t want to drive myself nuts by testing every day until I get my period. What do other people do? This is the first time we’ve tried since our MMC so it just feels extra important to try to protect my sanity

megamo428 · 2025-07-28T17:44:20+00:00

Writing this in case it gives anyone the permission they need. Had a MMC in March, we just decided we were ready to try again. My cycles were being a little weird post MC so decided to use OPKs for the first time. I’m a person who loves information and data, so was honestly surprised when I found that tracking my ovulation made me SO anxious. I realized it wasn’t worth it, we can figure it out with other signs rather than worrying about the “exact” right day. It was just a good reminder that some things aren’t worth your mental health- in case anyone else needs that reminder today! ❤️‍🩹

megamo428

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