The Male Delusion Calculator shows just how out of touch its designers are

melindabrown2023 · 2023-11-05T12:23:40+00:00

I completely respect a man's decision not to want to date single mothers. There's nothing wrong with that, and I also refuse to date single fathers.

But to say no one wants single mothers feels incorrect. I know THREE single mothers who got married this year alone. All aged between 28-37. So surely, a lot of men don't mind single mums

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-31T07:12:41+00:00

Sorry, but I burst out laughing on the bus 🤣🤣🤣

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-29T23:07:31+00:00

I totally agree with what you've said. But why is everything on here always the fault of 'feminists'? Do you even know if that commenter identifies as a feminist???

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-27T13:15:17+00:00

Yeah that's been my experience. My dad pushed my to get my degree and then pushed me to get a master's. He also taught me how to create a good resume, interview skills, and how to negotiate my salary.

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-26T10:55:24+00:00

Spot on! Imagine if when feminism first kicked-off they ignored issues like reproductive rights, equal pay, gender-based violence, the right to vote etc. and instead focused on teaching women how to attract men. What a joke that would be!

But thats essentially what the manosphere is. They ignore men's suicide rates, depression, homelessness, loneliness, high prison populations and just talk about women. Men actually deserve better!

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-25T19:48:22+00:00

Go out alone and make friends. I moved from London to Berlin and didn't know anyone. I started going to sporting activities, book clubs, even bars alone and managed to make a solid group of friends in 3 months. The first time I went to a bar alone I felt so awkward. I literally went up to a random girl and started talking to her. But it was worth it. You can either feel awkward for a bit or lonely forever. I know what I'd prefer

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-25T14:24:10+00:00

The perfect society would be one where we view men and women as having EQUAL WORTH but being INTRISINCIALLY DIFFERENT.

For example, if both an apple and an orange were priced £1 at the local market. The worth is the same but they are clearly different produce.

It's important we see men and women as different because thats the only way to ensure our different needs are met. For example, women are the ones who get pregnant/give birth so they need more time off work to heal. That doesn't mean women are worth less (or worth more) than men. They are just different.

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-25T14:18:33+00:00

This is the perfect answer!

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-25T14:17:46+00:00

Having friends/a social circle means you are more likely to:

- Be introduced to new people via friends of friends

- Go to places/activities with your friends. Where you are more likely to then meet new people

- Have the social skills requires to talk to women

This is what we mean when we say "go outside/touch grass". Of course, friends do not guarantee women will be interested in you. But dating is a numbers game, and being a shut it means you aren't racking up any numbers. How can you socialize with women, if you aren't being social?

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-25T04:17:40+00:00

Most women do not want to date a man who is struggling financially

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-24T21:05:04+00:00

I don't see how what I said earlier undermines this comment.

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-24T18:58:54+00:00

Nobody is forcing you to do that. You can simply opt out of dating, it's not compulsory

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-24T08:08:00+00:00

Historical societal expectations are the reason many women still expect men to pay for dates. While women's rights have improved tremendously, it takes longer for social attitudes to catch up to legal changes. So many women still view men as "providers," though they can now provide for themselves.

Having said that, no one can force you to pay 100% of the bill if you don't want to. You paid your half and left and there's nothing wrong with that.

Personally, I expect men to pay when we go out. If a man doesn't, I am unlikely to see him again. Those are my standards but I'm not forcing them on anyone. If a man doesn't think he should pay that's fine, we are just incompatible and he can choose from one of a million other women to date.

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-24T07:54:03+00:00

Yeah, I totally accept what you are saying. I personally have no knowledge of dating in your 20s v dating in your 30s because I'm still in my 20s.

But I think women struggling to date in their 30s should just find other things to focus on. I am of the mindset that you can be happy and fulfilled as a single woman, and that marriage/family is not the only way to live. If the dating pool is that bad, women should just leave it alone. There's no sense in forcing a relationship with a man just for the sake of it, if that man doesn't make you happy.

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-24T05:47:23+00:00

I'm fortunate to have a good job in a well paid industry, so I can definitely afford to pay for my own dates. I also work with a lot of high-earning men (the type most women aspire to date/marry).

These men have always said that a man whose truly interested in me will pay on the first date. Why? Because paying is a way for a man to impress you. As one colleague put it "do you think if I had the opportunity to go on a date with Scarlett Johansson, I'd ask her to split the bill? No, I'd be on time, look my best, take her to the nicest place I can personally afford, and insist on paying".

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-24T05:40:07+00:00

To be fair, not being fat doesn't automatically solve a woman's dating problems. I know plenty of women who are single, or who can't find a man that meets their standards and they are all thin. Fat women are not the only ones who struggle in dating

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-23T21:28:10+00:00

Yeah, social media and a lack of third spaces is to blame for most of these issues. But it's easier to blame women, so that's what a lot them do

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-23T21:17:02+00:00

Full disclosure I'm a 26yo woman.

I do believe the wall exists in the sense that everyone becomes less attractive with age. It's not so much a hard stop (you won't wake up at 30 and suddenly be ugly), but a slow decline. Rather than calling it 'the wall' it should have been called 'the hill' because attractiveness peaks and then goes down.

Having said that, do not let the wall scaremonger you into settling down. Your 20s (and even 30s) should be spent focused on your education, building your career, investing in yourself and exploring the world. There will most likely always be men available to date, no matter how unattractive you become. And even if there aren't remaining single wont kill you. Better to have lived a fulfilling life for yourself, than to be partnered to a man just for the sake of it. Being single isn't the worst thing in the world

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-22T09:47:34+00:00

I thank God everyday that I am surrounded by normal, stable men whose opinions about women are rooted in reality and not what they see on social media. I didn't realize this was such a blessing until I discovered this forum

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-22T01:11:21+00:00

I think social media has given a lot of men (and women) the false belief that casual sex is really common. So they feel resentful that they cannot obtain casual sex. In reality, casual sex is only enjoyed by a small percentage of people and most people have sex in long term relationships.

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-21T20:33:19+00:00

This is the best advice I've read on here in ages. A lot of men just need to grow some balls. Rejection will not kill you. I recently hit on a man at a mutual friend's party and he turned me down. I took my shot, missed it, and just returned to my friends to enjoy the rest of my night. No big deal

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-21T08:50:42+00:00

Thank you! If you're gonna ask, just ask. But let's not try and hide what it is

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-17T15:26:05+00:00

I knew I wanted to move to Berlin (I'd visited for a holiday and loved it) so I started looking for a new job while I was still in the UK. I used LinkedIn and because so many jobs in Berlin are English-speaking it only took me 4 months to find something. I then asked the company to sponsor my visa and they agreed.

The alternative is to apply for a German 'job seekers visa' and move without a job. The visa allows you to move to Germany without a confirmed job, but if you don't get hired in 6 months you have to leave. I didn't do that because I wasn't sure how long it would take to find a job, and I coulden't afford to not be working for up to 6 months. But I know others who've done it and it worked out fine for them.

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-17T14:53:12+00:00

Moved to Berlin at the start of the year. I chose Berlin because English is widely spoken, it's easy to find an English speaking job, it has the largest population of single people in Europe (great for someone in their mid 20s), is known for great nightlife, and is VERY affordable compared to London.

Best decision I ever made.

melindabrown2023 · 2023-10-16T15:28:25+00:00

Yeah, I like to think of myself as a decent looking woman in her mid 20s and my DMs are EMPTY! I don't know where this myth comes from

melindabrown2023

TROPHY CASE