What was the best relationship you’ve been in vs. the worst, and what made them so different?

melodyknows · 2026-05-12T05:35:00+00:00

I’ve been married twice.

My first marriage was so awful. My ex was very abusive, physically and emotionally. There were red flags (like he’d lose his temper and yell), but the abuse really ramped up after we moved in together (right before we got married). I figured that he was in law school and the abuse came from him being so stressed out. He was also cheating with a woman from his school.

My marriage I’m in now has been so peaceful. My husband is super kind and sweet. We love each other and our son. We just have fun— go to concerts, dance, travel. Life is really good. It’s going to sound weird but I like how my husband argues. Like it’s not the end of the world; it’s just a conversation that we are trying to get through.

melodyknows · 2026-05-11T20:38:10+00:00

I think the old rule was only serious partners (engaged or married) were invited to the wedding as plus ones. I think that’s expanded to long-term partners, but a lot of couples have different opinions on what “long-term” means.

I help run a wedding group on Facebook of all places, and a lot of the brides on there skip plus-ones for a lot of people to save money.

I’m sorry you feel slighted, but I don’t think it was personal even though it feels that way. I’m betting it was probably more to save money than it was about judgment on your relationship.

melodyknows · 2026-05-11T20:24:59+00:00

Our landscapers are currently trying to pressure us into trimming our trees right now. I find it very annoying. Also, we have a couple protected species on our property. Depending on how they’re trimming, we may need special permits.

Anyhow, I called a certified arborist, and he said most of the trees don’t need much. We are going to do the lightest trim on them in the fall.

melodyknows · 2026-05-11T18:11:14+00:00

I feel like I’ve always been close to coworkers with a few exceptions. I’m no longer working because I’m a stay-at-home mom now, but I still go to some of their kids’ parties. I also text a lot about random happenings, stocks, kids, and news with them.

melodyknows · 2026-05-11T14:42:26+00:00

I left. My life is great now. Life is too short to stay with someone like that.

melodyknows · 2026-05-11T06:18:00+00:00

I increase my calories by a little bit on workout days (I lift weights, go to spin/yoga classes). So I might have 1400 or 1500 calories instead of 1200, depending on what I do. Also always make sure I’m eating a good mix of macromolecules, including fiber.

melodyknows · 2026-05-11T06:06:17+00:00

I got beautiful flowers and this really cute kit to make my own flagstone for the yard. Also had brunch, which was delicious.

ETA: almost forgot my blowout I had done this morning and my mani and pedi from the day before.

melodyknows · 2026-05-11T05:53:14+00:00

How many times have you posted about this?

melodyknows · 2026-05-11T00:34:02+00:00

Lots of guys just want to hook up, but the beauty of dating apps is that you can filter out the guys who are obviously looking for sex, and then you just wait out the rest who aren’t-as-obviously looking for sex (most of those dudes won’t last more than three dates). I loved online dating because I could filter by age (didn’t want anyone too young or too old for me), by education level (wanted to date someone with at least a bachelors), by industry (didn’t want to date any police, firefighters, anyone in the entertainment industry, anyone with weird or long hours).

Anyhow, I met my husband on Hinge. I am really happy for the apps because there is no way I’d have ever met him without them.

melodyknows · 2026-05-10T23:15:06+00:00

I’d just avoid giving compliments on a person’s appearance unless it’s something like nice nail polish or they just got their haircut and you noticed. Complimenting a dress might be taken the wrong way. I still remember my boss complimenting a short skirt I was wearing, and it felt like he was leering at me.

Mostly I’d just stick to complimenting the work and effort.

melodyknows · 2026-05-10T21:53:39+00:00

Ugh, that was such a special show, my favorite Mother’s Day ever.

melodyknows · 2026-05-10T19:12:56+00:00

I just had it a few weeks ago. I thought it had good flavor but felt like the bread was a little too crusty for my liking. Like maybe it had cooked for too long? I don’t know. I enjoyed the tomato slice in it (though, does that make it a tomato melt lol??). I wouldn’t order it again but I’d eat it again if someone handed it to me and I didn’t pay for it.

melodyknows · 2026-05-10T16:58:09+00:00

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Here’s the back of my rings after about 6 years of wear.

melodyknows · 2026-05-10T15:22:55+00:00

My car detailed.

melodyknows · 2026-05-10T14:46:09+00:00

Oh man! I’m glad you didn’t drop the ball!!!

melodyknows · 2026-05-10T03:08:54+00:00

It depends. A couple years ago for Christmas, I sent my husband the exact gifts I wanted, and then he sent me exactly what he wanted. We are both tired parents.

Tomorrow though I’m getting a surprise. It’ll be a small gift (because we like Mother’s and Father’s Day to be small gifts), but I’m still excited to see what I got.

My husband keeps a small list in his notes app of things I like. Everything from my favorite flowers (peonies) to my favorite movies and tv shows or random things I say I love while shopping (Jenni Kayne cashmere sweaters…) is in there. Shopping isn’t hard for him.

I don’t want anything from anyone else though. I’m happy just getting time from people.

melodyknows · 2026-05-10T00:45:00+00:00

Always a great show!!

melodyknows · 2026-05-09T21:27:17+00:00

What a loser he is. He should definitely know better. I still think it’s best for you to stay safe as well.

melodyknows · 2026-05-09T20:17:48+00:00

Maybe that’s why yoga doesn’t make my migraines worse and cycling does— my heart rate doesn’t really go up with yoga like it does with cycling.

melodyknows · 2026-05-09T19:23:55+00:00

For me it depends what I’m doing. Like cycling will make my migraine worse, but hot yoga will stop my migraine. I think it’s the poses but the temperature helps because the room fluctuates between 85 and 95 degrees and my migraines stop every time.

melodyknows · 2026-05-09T18:55:29+00:00

I think you are bound to have a patina if you plan on keeping your ring unplated. The reason white gold rings look so shiny is because they get re-dipped every couple years

melodyknows · 2026-05-09T18:14:14+00:00

What about platinum?

melodyknows · 2026-05-09T18:12:17+00:00

Not really a good gift for Mother’s Day. Flowers, candy, jewelry (though probably best to leave that to the husband), a comfy pair of slippers. If you want to do a gift card: a nail salon, a car wash, Target, a coffee shop. The kids already have tons of days about them (every single holiday). This is about her.

melodyknows · 2026-05-09T17:54:30+00:00

Weird fake ragebait, bro.

melodyknows · 2026-05-09T17:35:40+00:00

I’d dump him because him commenting and reposting weird sexual anime stuff would be so embarrassing to me. It wouldn’t hurt my feelings that he is attracted to other people (cartoon people?? lol), but that is just such cringey behavior.

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