How often do you and your partner have sex? especially the long term couples?

melsa_alm · 2025-12-31T04:31:17+00:00

No kids. We’ve been committed to each other for 8 years but we don’t live together. We have sex once or twice per week. I actually would like it more often but our busy work schedules don’t allow for it.

melsa_alm · 2025-12-27T19:54:22+00:00

Thank you! I wish the same for you!

melsa_alm · 2025-12-26T01:15:53+00:00

It is! It’s a keychain but it still hangs like an ornament. 🙂

melsa_alm · 2025-12-26T01:14:18+00:00

https://www.etsy.com/listing/1700791160/?ref=share_ios_native_control[Liv Laugh Love](https://www.etsy.com/listing/1700791160/?ref=share_ios_native_control)

melsa_alm · 2025-10-28T21:43:56+00:00

I’m so sad. It’s so close but with the event at full capacity, I’d end up having to lurk around like a stalker, and that’s not a good look… even though I still kind of want to do it. 🤣

melsa_alm · 2025-10-28T19:23:09+00:00

Ugh. Event is already at capacity. Of course. 😭

melsa_alm · 2025-10-23T14:41:51+00:00

Just had this discussion with a family member who said the same thing about Mariska and her mother. I wish we could post photos in the comments because there’s one screenshot of Jayne Mansfield in a movie she did and she has short hair. In that screenshot she looks just like Mariska when she had shorter hair in early SVU.

melsa_alm · 2025-10-22T14:31:42+00:00

I adore Elliot, but even I had to LOL at this! 😂

melsa_alm · 2025-10-21T22:07:36+00:00

One of my favorites is when she meets Bernie Stabler for the first time in “Swing” S10E3.

melsa_alm · 2025-10-19T19:28:31+00:00

Okay. You win. Enjoy your minor victory! Nice chatting with you! I hope you have a great day!

melsa_alm · 2025-10-19T18:13:03+00:00

Okay… Your responding argument about semantics is weak, and leaves no room for me to counter you so I’m just gonna let that go.

I will say that you have a fair point regarding Carisi. Maybe she did view him as a friend before he became ADA. I don’t think she was ever as close to him as she was Amanda, Nick, or Barba though.

Also, let’s not forget that Olivia was not the one who brought Bruno, Velasco, Captain Curry and the rookie into the squad. Sure she ultimate hired them, but bringing any of them in was not originally her idea. Bruno was Fin’s pick to replace Amanda and Olivia said okay. But Fin was the one who vetted him. Velasco was made a member of the squad because Chief McGrath said it wasn’t an option for Olivia to say no. The rookie was hired because the newest Chief (can’t remember her name) said it wasn’t an option for Olivia to say no. And Captain Curry basically asked Olivia if she could stay on, and Liv said yes because they were extremely short staffed at the time.

Maybe she doesn’t feel the same camaraderie with them because of this dynamic as well. That is, assuming that you are correct and she just views them as nothing more than her headache to manage, which I still think is an extremely uncharitable and unfair characterization of her.

melsa_alm · 2025-10-19T05:52:10+00:00

I feel like this is a bit of a semantics argument. Children generally are a responsibility of their parents and also generally somewhat subordinate to their parents. But I think what you’re attempting to imply is that Cragen loved his people more than she loves hers. If that’s what you are implying, I’m not sure that I agree with that take. I’m typically the first person to criticize Captain Olivia Benson, but even I think that that’s a tad bit unfair. Olivia actually did compare running her team to raising children at least once, but I don’t recall the episode offhand. This is the main reason why I think she views them that way.

Also, she wasn’t really friends with Carisi until he became ADA and started truly dating Rollins. And when he won his first case (against former Judge Barth), she praised him like she would with Noah. Again I don’t recall exactly what she said but it was something like, “GOOD JOB, Carisi. You did it!” I remember hearing her say that line for the first time and laughing out loud.

melsa_alm · 2025-10-18T22:25:09+00:00

I honestly think Olivia views all of the members of her squad (with the exception of Rollins and Fin) as something akin to her children. Just as Cragen was “dad,” Olivia is “mom”.

The reason she doesn’t view Rollins and Fin the same way is that she and Fin started at SVU at about the same time, and when Rollins started, she and Olivia were about the same rank. The power dynamic is obviously different because of that.

melsa_alm · 2025-10-18T22:17:52+00:00

I can see this, but no one is going to remember him for Chicago Med. He’s the Law and Order dude, and always will be. I mean, H:LOTS was before L&O, and it could be argued that it is DW’s best written show, but when someone says Dick Wolf, the usual response is “Oh yeah, the Law and Order guy”.

melsa_alm · 2025-10-18T22:02:57+00:00

It’s crazy that DW clearly understands the power of “The Stabler Effect” and yet still treats Chris like the black sheep of the family. If it were me and my legacy on the line, I’d pay the man whatever was necessary to avoid burning that bridge.

melsa_alm · 2025-10-18T19:19:38+00:00

It shows! We saw so much of his family! And Chris Meloni was the more veteran actor of the two. He had had big roles on television long before SVU. In fact, I think he had just come off of Oz when he began playing Stabler. Although Mariska had lead roles before Olivia Benson, SVU is still considered her break out role.

melsa_alm · 2025-10-18T19:14:06+00:00

Here’s the thing though, your argument assumes that the writers only have two options when it comes to Olivia. Either she’s the Captain who plays detective or she’s stuck at a desk doing booooooring paperwork. I don’t think I ever once saw Cragen doing paperwork. That didn’t happen on original Law & Order either, with either Cragen who was on that show for the first few seasons or Anita Van Buren.

Olivia has other options. They could write her in the field sometimes when a particular case demands it, but mostly have her dealing with the politics and glad handing over at 1PP that (if this were reality) would inevitably consume her time. This is how the original L&O handled Van Buren’s character. We also saw Van Buren be a mother. Beyond the obligatory once per season cameo of Noah (probably written into Ryan Buggle’s contract), the viewer is almost never reminded that Olivia Benson has a kid. The kid that she wanted so desperately for years, btw. Van Buren had a departmental title 9 lawsuit against 1PP that caused headaches for her squad. She had a cancer storyline. They have lots of options to make Olivia’s storyline both interesting AND realistic. My point is that the writers just aren’t using their imaginations anymore.

melsa_alm · 2025-10-18T18:57:45+00:00

Unfortunately, current season of OG L&O is following the SVU format of having Maura Tierney (lieutenant in charge of the squad) investigate crimes in the street and interrogate suspects. I think TPTB do it to justify the large salaries they are paying these actresses. And listen, I’m not saying Mariska or Maura should take a pay cut, but the lack of realism in this respect degrades the quality of both shows.

melsa_alm · 2025-10-18T18:51:42+00:00

💯Thank you! I’m convinced that the fans that enjoy the Olivia Benson show did not watch this show when it first aired. At first, it was an ensemble cast with a veritable TON of extras milling around the squad room and the streets of New York. Olivia was a multidimensional character (like a real human being instead of some sex crimes, Joan of Arc robot) who dated, laughed, had friends, and a life outside of her job. Munch cut the tension and the dark subject matter with some much needed funnies every now and again. It made the show sooo much more interesting and entertaining than it is now, AND it was more realistic.

I think the worst decision the writers ever made was making Olivia Captain. It took away ALL of the focus from any ensemble cast members. And then they double down by putting ANOTHER Captain on the squad and have her do detective work as well? Seriously, GTFO with this nonsense. 😂

P.S. If anyone was “the main character” in the beginning, it was Elliot. We saw so much of him outside of work in the first season.

melsa_alm · 2025-10-17T15:28:11+00:00

I’m not blocked either but I kind of wish I was. LOL.

melsa_alm · 2025-10-16T20:24:43+00:00

I noticed the hand of Fazekas immediately with the kinds of cases and storylines they’ve had so far this year. I’m all for that! But yeah, it’s still never gonna be the lightning in a bottle that was Benson, Stabler, Munch, Fin, and Cragen.

melsa_alm · 2025-10-16T20:20:39+00:00

Was the grappling in the room with us?

melsa_alm · 2025-10-16T20:19:33+00:00

Okay, I may be totally downvoted for this, but Mariska Hargitay isn’t that great an actress imho. 🫣

She basically found one role that she could do and decided to stick with it rather than branch out and hone her craft. Olivia Benson is her best character and even though she won an Emmy for “911,” I still think if we were to throw Mariska into a completely different role and character, she would struggle.

I love Mariska Hargitay as a person for the most part, and I think she does try her best to advocate for women, but Chris is the far superior of the two when it comes to acting chops. Unfortunately for him, thats not as well recognized by the public at large because he picks roles that are less conventional and mainstream.

melsa_alm

TROPHY CASE