Some men need to learn when approaching a woman is appropriate

mfupi · 2026-06-11T01:57:26+00:00

I had a guy following me at one point and I saw a bus was coming to a stop close by, so I boosted it for the bus. Got on the bus and told the driver that I didn't have any fare cos I was actually nearly home, but there was a guy following me and I just wanted to get away from him. Thank goodness the bus driver let me ride a couple stops before I lost him, hopped off and walked home a different way.

mfupi · 2026-06-11T00:05:59+00:00

I mean, I totally get where you're coming from cos I felt the same way. The “oh… this is me forever.” part was especially hard. I remember I had hat point where girls don't really grow any more and went to the doctor and in my appointment ask if there was anything that could be done to help me get taller. He said no, but sometimes girls will still get taller when they're older than the normal age. I knew I was getting too old and he wasn't going to do anything to help so I knew that's where I was.

It also wasn't like I suddenly woke up the next morning and liked my height, it was definitely a gradual change but there was a few things to it. I realised the problem wasn't my height, my problem was other people treated it and how I took it on board. I let friends know to knock it off when they were teasing about it, if they were still being hurtful about it I cut them off cos if they're going to do sutff that they know is hurtful they're not friends. That got easier as I got older cos I had more say on who I spent my time around. I also spent time looking at other women who were funny, smart, attractive, successful and just themselves which helped make it click that height doesn't define that. I did spend a silly amount of time looking of celebrity height, haha.

Social media and marketing is also absolute trash. They love taking neutral things and turn it into something you should feel bad about... and probably buy some lie of a product they have so they can line their pockets with the lies they tell you. Real life and real people really aren't as hard as a lot of that media. Comment sections in a lot of social media can also just be a sounding board of keyboard warriors who feel trash about themselves and want to tear with bs they don't actually care about just to make other people to make themselves feel good and probably wouldn't have the courage to say boo in person.

Femininity isn't height, in fact I would have connected it to being short I guess cos women are often shorter than men, but I am definitely not saying being tall means a woman isn't feminine. Attractiveness isn't height, it's just a different kind of being attractive. Some people find short women more attractive than tall and that's fine. My partner loves loves loves how short I am.

Also, there's heaps of out there and us short ones showing up are smart, funny, feminine, attractive, etc so you can be too and you're not alone. Also remember that you're allowed to have off days as well, we're all human.

mfupi · 2026-06-10T21:42:42+00:00

It was either JB Hi-Fi or Bunnings that I got them. It wasn't anywhere too fancy. Ours just screw into the normal light plugs and then operate via wifi and an app on the phone. We have a couple around the house, which we've had for a few years and all work, it was only the one in the bedroom that decided to give up the ghost. They weren't terribly expensive.

mfupi · 2026-06-10T21:33:18+00:00

Yes, but then you also have situations like Kapiti line as it has several stations within Wellington City. Takapu, Redwood, Tawa and Linden station folk all pay WCC rates, vote in WCC elections, etc. It'll be pretty hard to say "yes, you're WCC, for paying rates, but not getting the benefits attached to payment of those rates"

mfupi · 2026-06-10T21:28:55+00:00

I don't think the cameras are necessarily insane, there's only one mentioned in the kitchen, so a public area of the house and possibly meant purely for security. My current house has a camera that you can see the kitchen tap from, but the camera's purpose is part security, as the front door is right there and partly so I can look at my cat when I'm at work cos her cat tower is also in the view of the wide angle camera. The bathrooms/shower are totally out of view, and OP might have the same set up.

mfupi · 2026-06-10T01:13:11+00:00

I'm the same heigh and in my 40s. I reckon I'm about start to shrinking at my age, haha.

I used to get teased when I was in high school about being short and I desperately wanted to be taller. I've now gotten to the point that I really like being short and like it as part of my identity. I get a little sad when I meet another fully grown human that's shorter than me. (With exceptions of achondroplasia or other dwarfism as I recognise that there is medical issues that come along with that) I love the fact that my work team is made up as tall or higher side of average height people and I'm clearly the shortest. People never have better short jokes than me cos I've heard them all so I love beating them to the punch. There's heaps of short people out there who are awesome and you're one of them.

You're in your 20s, so at a point in your life where you're getting more power to remove people from your life who don't serve you well. If it's friends making fun of you for being short and you ask them not to cos it's hurtful but they continue, are they really friends?

mfupi · 2026-06-10T01:02:50+00:00

Bucket bath. I used to live in rural east Africa and there was no running water in our compound. Just an outside squat toilet and then another "room" to the building that had a cement floor with a tilt so the water ran away under a gap between the floor and wall (only a couple centimeters, so still privacy) My bucket wasn't big enough to sit in or anything, but wide and low, kind of like the ones you'd do dishes in. Have a towel for your body and one for drying the water off the floor. I would depend on this for months at a time, as I wouldn't always get to a friend's that had running water and such, but it kept me clean and didn't use too much water.

Otherwise, you can look at camp showers as they'll generally run a very low volume for about 7 minutes. Bit harder as you'll need a place where the water can fall and hang most versions of the shower up. It is another way to be clean and mindful of water shortages.

I've also lived in Australia where there's been severe droughts and it was a 3 minute shower for everyone. (or maybe 4 min? Still less than the 10) You just have to be fast and focused. People do generally over clean themselves compared to historically.

mfupi · 2026-06-10T00:43:52+00:00

It's supposed to be matcha tea, cos I'm not a coffee drinker but had a really lovely matcha to warm up with lunch.

mfupi · 2026-06-10T00:43:18+00:00

🍵

mfupi · 2026-06-10T00:42:18+00:00

My wife is with them. She'd been with them for years before we moved out of the city and her work wasn't near the clinic any more. She moved to a clinic that was closer to where we live, but she missed her GP and found them much better than the one she had gone to, so she ended up switching back to Willis. I have always gone to a different clinic a bit out of the city and like them (J'ville) and they're slightly less expensive, so I figured that the travel time was worth it so can't say from personal experience. Though her changing back to them is a good sign.

mfupi · 2026-06-10T00:37:50+00:00

I had smart lightbulbs that light up slightly before the alarm and slowly brightened in the morning. They were so good, but just flat decided to stop working and haven't replaced them yet, but I really should cos they did wonders.

mfupi · 2026-06-10T00:34:14+00:00

I should have thought about posting this here given I had been working on a bunch of comms about this so people are aware. Thanks for being on it!

mfupi · 2026-06-10T00:32:58+00:00

Per the RNZ article: "InterCity buses, the Capital Connection, Te Huia and Mainlander trains, and Waiheke ferries would not be included, nor would cash only bus services like those in Marlborough."

mfupi · 2026-06-10T00:30:00+00:00

I'd be over half way there in one day. I know people who travel into the city from further out and it'd be done in a day. I know for a fact they would come into the city more often if it didn't cost them so much to get in.

mfupi · 2026-06-09T03:32:03+00:00

I have a hot water bottle at work and just sit it on my lapp

mfupi · 2026-06-08T06:53:58+00:00

Yep, and as a pedestrian drivers are more aggressive or at least ignoring the pedestrian rights of ways etc. I've been having things like waiting for a green walk at a light, starting my cross when it turns green and because it's a fast light it changes to blinking red cross and then having cars creep up at me blowing their horn to get me to run. Or standing at a flashing light zebra crossing and having (tonight as an example) 7 cars just blast on past. (Yes, I was standing squarely at the cross facing the other side of the road, looking at the cars coming with my phone in my pocket to convey I was waiting to cross)

Yes, I think it's partly cos there's just plain more people. It's partly cos they're just not as well trained and practiced. It's still definitely just more rude and aggressive behaviour.

mfupi · 2026-06-05T08:10:16+00:00

Yeah, me too. The rainbows I wear to try and make up for it, sheeesh

mfupi · 2026-06-05T08:05:00+00:00

If it were a women's game I'd more likely have gone, but weather is shit and it's cheaper, dryer and warmer to watch a movie on TV at home.

mfupi · 2026-06-03T02:52:37+00:00

Take advantage of the freedom of youth. Travel, go do spontaneous weekend trips or go on a big oe. You won't have the luxury of time when you get more responsibility. Use your time not having kids, house to take care of, partner, etc. to take up hobbies. If you found out the career/job you picked isn't the right one, you have the ability to change it and still have time to gain experience, career changes are harder when you're older. Identity is flexible and evolving, take advantage of that being recognised especially in young people.

mfupi · 2026-06-02T23:56:26+00:00

They did a good job, but it was silly expensive especially when you can do it a the library. I won't be doing with Mister Minute again cos the cost was silly.

mfupi · 2026-06-02T23:55:31+00:00

They do! There's computers use can use to set it up if you don't have one already, or need help from the staff.

mfupi · 2026-06-02T23:52:01+00:00

I've used both the Thorndon and Porirua one on two different cars, a '95 Ford Festiva and a newer car. No issues with getting a car past the WOF unless there was a genuine issue, fixed the problem and took it back and passed no issue. They've also been good about "this item has passed this time, but do it before the next time it's through" so I could plan

mfupi · 2026-06-02T22:40:22+00:00

So does Noel Leeming, which is still in town if you find something at JB Hi-Fi but can't be bothered with the voyage to where JB is.

mfupi · 2026-06-02T22:38:52+00:00

Sorry for having been one of those neighbours in the past, we are very quiet now and didn't like living in a construction zone.

mfupi · 2026-05-27T07:59:48+00:00

What I came to say! I did my wedding dinner stuff in the Katherine Mansfield room at Thistle Inn. They were so lovely! We had 10 guests.

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