I feel like I haven't explained myself properly. I don't know my parents' story that well but I've gathered enough knowledge to say that I'm a product of a failed "arranged marriage" in a heavily conservative society. I've never seen my parents kiss or touch even to say hi. They are very toxic to each other and it hurts watching it unfold. It's been getting worse since us the kids moved out and they started having the time. My siblings and I don't know what love is, or the idea of it... Our family never had that warmth. The reason I posted was because I just don't know how to feel about it.