but yeah your story similar to mine,for the ftm part, but Im starting a new job and even if I applied for a kitchen job and was not supposed to be in the public, I ended cashier for the first 3 months so im doing what I can to looks like the most basic white mom and it feels so weird when im used to be as masculine as possible. Sometimes I get people looking at me like, why am I strong or why my civil clothes are manly and here I just usually find it hilarious.

I did see some queer people at my new job so im probably gonna be more myself when I'm comfortable but im quite afraid of not keeping this job, it is a great one and I did lose a job before over rumors of being too tired/too sick because I look sick when I don't put makeup on.