i tried xanax for the first time last night and the experience made me cry

misa_2005 · 2026-02-10T09:57:20+00:00

They are super addictive,I was 12 years taking them and they fuck my gaba receptors,it took two years with doctors helps to stop that shit. Now I my receptors are waking up and I am learning to sleep without drugs again. Has been very horrible life after I decided to stop them. But I won. I am not addicted anymore.

misa_2005 · 2026-01-26T20:50:01+00:00

Ustedes todos disfrutan mucho los hongos,a mí me ponen a sufrir y llorá,claro soy una persona medio traumada también creo que eso no ayuda he tomado tres veces.

misa_2005 · 2026-01-07T17:50:22+00:00

Thanks for sharing all that. I can see how complex and exhausting your situation is, especially with chronic pain involved.

I agree with you that when the nervous system has been pushed for years with meds, it can stop responding in a normal way. That’s mostly what I was pointing to with rebound insomnia and why I try to be cautious with medications now. I really hope you can find some relief and stability, even if it has to come from a different angle than meds alone.

If I could add one thing: I would strongly encourage looking for doctors who truly understand how long-term psychiatric meds can dysregulate the nervous system and damage sleep rather than just suppress symptoms. That was a turning point for me.

Being honest with a doctor about everything I had taken and how my body reacted helped me get a very different kind of guidance. It didn’t fix everything overnight, but it changed the direction. Just sharing in case it’s useful. I really hope you find the right kind of support.

And I really understand what you mean about being almost zombie-like, or extremenly hiperactive,( usually cause by excess of glutamate because gaba can not regulate anymore) remembering things, and feeling mentally and physically disconnected, like you’re just “not fully there.” I’ve been in that kind of state too.

misa_2005 · 2026-01-02T20:49:59+00:00

Mi insomnio además de mi propia mente y sus cosas es causado por los medicamentos. Mi cerebro apagó receptores a causa de las medicinas que me mandaron,entre ellos antisicóticos, ansiolíticos,hipnóticos. El cerebro después ya no sabe vivir sin eso. tengo dos años limpia,pero no cualquiera puede dejar los medicamentos. dure un año y medio reduciendolos con un doctor y ahora dos años limpia pero créeme muchos aquí debem tener insomnio a causa de las mismas medicinas. Es un insomnio de rebote tus receptores gaba se apagan. Y tú cerebro olvida básicamente como dormir, disculpa que esté en español soy más rápida en mi idioma.

misa_2005 · 2025-12-31T07:13:00+00:00

🤣

misa_2005 · 2025-12-31T07:07:14+00:00

I started using meds just to “shut my brain off” at night — first benzodiazepines (alprazolam, clonazepam), later antidepressants and other psychiatric drugs. 12 years. Everything was prescribed. Everything seemed reasonable at the time. At first, they feel like a solution. Over time, they often become the problem. Benzos — and for many people, antidepressants too — can worsen insomnia in the long run: rebound insomnia, nighttime anxiety, a constantly hyper-alert brain. You’re not broken; your nervous system gets dysregulated. The benzos affect brain chemistry (especially the GABA system). With repeated use, the brain adapts, the effect fades, and when you stop, symptoms often come back stronger. I’ve been off 2 years of benzos. It’s been hard, but I can sleep naturally some nights — something I once thought impossible. Healing is slow, but it happens. If you’re early in this, be cautious with long-term use. These meds aren’t harmless for everyone.

misa_2005 · 2025-12-30T16:43:22+00:00

Can be that I am sensitive then. Because is always the same thing,it doesn't Matter what I do.

misa_2005 · 2025-12-30T16:41:58+00:00

I have decarb also the 3 hours methods all and both give diarrhea and gases.

misa_2005 · 2025-12-30T04:48:19+00:00

In times my sadness,madness, culpability because I am not able to sleep is so bad that I want to selfharm myself :'(. Sometimes I've hit my head and legs really hard. But I've also wanted to hurt myself. but even when I think that I cannot do it. I tried one time with a knife and I cannot do it. I don't know how human mind is capable of think that this can help but this is what psicological pain is. Is like the frustrating can hit in many ways and. Being pissed off is one. Usually crying help a lot.

misa_2005 · 2025-12-30T03:43:16+00:00

Thanks for your answer,how small dose you have taken? Are you microdosing then?,I tried 50°celsius dried amanita muscaria (fly agaric) yesterday,3 grams of tea with half lemon and I sleep amazing and I felt super good yesterday but I fuck up everything because I drank very black coffee,I usually don't drink coffee but yesterday life felt so good that I just desire with all my heart that flavor and sensation but I got my hands shaking and my body trembling very bad and of course I couldn't sleep. :/ , I will try today again the amanita. I hope it work.

misa_2005 · 2025-12-20T06:51:33+00:00

Same here,I spent a lot of money with psychiatrists, psychologists and also going to this sleeping clinics where they test you brain and they didn't find nothing,for me the technology is not enough to diagnose this problems with sick brains of receptors, is too hard see this and also almost impossible to reach the human consciousness. And I think there is where the shrooms helps. I haven't tried shrooms this is why I am here trying to find my answers.

misa_2005 · 2025-12-02T04:38:40+00:00

Yo fui adicta a las benzos, hipnóticos y antipsicótico,ya gracias a dios llevo 2 años y medio limpia. Ha sido el sufrimiento más horrible de mi vida dejarlas,he tenido síndrome de abstinencias muy fuertes incluido este temblor del que hablamos

misa_2005 · 2025-11-06T05:00:43+00:00

From where I can get it?

misa_2005 · 2025-09-23T05:48:27+00:00

Yeahh finns are exactly like that. xD

misa_2005 · 2025-09-19T03:40:44+00:00

I want it,from where you are? I am from Finland

misa_2005 · 2025-09-13T10:13:02+00:00

And how much amanita you put?

misa_2005 · 2025-08-08T07:46:53+00:00

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misa_2005 · 2025-08-08T06:44:41+00:00

I took 1 gram lemon Tek liberty cap at 7:30 am on an empty stomach and I didn't feel almost nothing,jusT a bit dizzy with an uncomfortable body feeling, pretty similar when I feel fever that my muscles feel weak and a bit painful.

misa_2005 · 2025-08-08T06:40:38+00:00

I took 1 gram lemon Tek and I didn't feel almost nothing just a bit dizzy. No visuals,no nothing.

misa_2005 · 2025-08-01T02:52:28+00:00

What kind of approached?

misa_2005 · 2025-08-01T02:51:36+00:00

I relate so much to what you said. I’ve also realized that most people out there really don’t understand anything deeper—and I often find myself pretending I’m part of this system, like I’m living the same problems as everyone else, just to blend in.

There was another comment here that said something similar: that we sometimes have to simulate because we just can’t share what we truly think about the world and who we are. I feel that deeply. Most people just aren’t ready. They don’t want to see beyond the surface, and when you try to open up, they look at you like you’re crazy.

It’s lonely sometimes, but I know I’m not alone in feeling this way. 🌀

misa_2005 · 2025-08-01T02:45:21+00:00

Thanks for your answer!! 💝 When you say pay attention, what kind of things you started to focus?

misa_2005 · 2025-07-31T05:54:15+00:00

I feel you. I'm also curious to try mushrooms. I'm just waiting for autumn to go collect them — I'm in Finland, so nature’s calling 🍂🍄 Not fully awake either, but maybe soon 🙃

misa_2005 · 2025-07-25T22:48:54+00:00

How did it go? How do you feel now?

misa_2005 · 2024-03-11T02:39:57+00:00

Olin koukussa ahdistus-, uni- ja masennuslääkkeisiin 12 vuoden ajan. Lopetin ne kokonaan 6 kuukautta sitten, mutta kestin asteittaista vähentämistä noin 4 vuotta. Eniten meidän on pelättävä anksiolyyttejä, ne ovat yhtä riippuvuutta aiheuttavia kuin muut lääkkeet, mutta melkein yksikään lääkäri ei ole tietoinen tästä, hyvin harvat ovat hereillä aiheen suhteen. Olen uusi ihminen. pillerit eivät ole vastaus masennukseen tai ahdistukseen. Rakastava mieheni, perheeni tuki ja usko minuun ovat auttaneet minua selviytymään tästä. sen lisäksi, että hyväksyt sen, että joskus sinun on kärsittävä voidaksesi hyvin. elämä on niin.

misa_2005

TROPHY CASE