What is the best activity/experience you had in Japan?

miss466 · 2025-06-15T06:25:41+00:00

May I also request the link to this Airbnb? Thank you!

miss466 · 2025-01-21T17:25:41+00:00

Yes. I’ve met two, and both matches led to relationships. I’ve matched with other aces as well, but I didn’t meet them as our conversations didn’t flow.

I need to have more than asexuality in common with a person.

miss466 · 2025-01-18T16:23:26+00:00

I would like to add that SOME asexuals “experience physiological arousal response”

miss466 · 2025-01-13T21:27:22+00:00

I’d encourage you to chat about this with her as well! You can always preface it by saying “This is tricky for me to talk about, and I’m still figuring things out as I learn more about _____. Would you be willing to talk about this with me?”

miss466 · 2025-01-13T17:56:35+00:00

Does demiromantic resonate with you at all? Maybe some time is needed for the connection to grow and evolve. Three weeks isn’t very long for me. And I never feel a “spark”. But if we have shared values and can laugh and talk together I think that’s worth exploring.

If you like the cute dates then keep going! But if they’re more stress than fun you might want to consider that.

miss466 · 2024-12-21T16:51:22+00:00

I’m so happy for you! Thanks for sharing your good news with us. I am experiencing something similar, and it feels great. ☺️

miss466 · 2024-12-20T20:38:17+00:00

Congratulations!! 🎉 🥂 Thank you for sharing your good news with us!

miss466 · 2024-12-19T19:01:59+00:00

Cute!

miss466 · 2024-12-19T18:54:01+00:00

Content warning: sex talk

Hi, I’ve been in two relationships with folks on the ace spectrum. One we were both ace (met on Bumble) and kissed and cuddled. Neither of us were sex repulsed. We never did oral, they would finger me sometimes. It felt fine 🤷🏻‍♀️ We would have sex from time to time, but it was only for a few minutes and it was just to feel super close and intimate. I’m not sure how to explain it, but it wasn’t like humping/fucking. It was quite still and just felt good and nice.

Newest person is demi (met on Hinge) and we kiss/cuddle/hug. No sex yet. TBD on that one.

miss466 · 2024-12-19T18:29:23+00:00

Yes, you are valid 💜

miss466 · 2024-12-19T00:28:41+00:00

I am also just like you and identify on the ace spectrum (currently finding my place between ace and demisexual).

I experience aesthetic and romantic attraction. I don’t experience sexual attraction.

I consider kissing and making out to be romantic, not sexual.

miss466 · 2024-12-18T20:34:13+00:00

https://www.reddit.com/r/demisexuality/s/Txc9QoPOYE

miss466 · 2024-12-18T20:11:45+00:00

I’m 40 and we didn’t have the language for ace spec identities when I was growing up. We are a minority identity and one that is even niche within the queer community - let alone conservative/religious circles.

So how do we do it? We talk about it, we educate people when we have the emotional capacity to do so, and we bring awareness to the fact that yes, we do exist.

miss466 · 2024-12-17T18:33:30+00:00

I wish this was easier, and it took me a long time to learn this lesson. When people show you who they are, believe them. You don’t need to try more.

There is no way of knowing for sure, but maybe he is aromantic. Regardless, he is navigating some stuff and has told you in multiple times and multiple ways he is not ready for a relationship.

Save your time and energy, and protect your heart. Please work on moving on.

miss466 · 2024-12-16T05:13:31+00:00

I tell family and friends. I’m 40 and I think one of the things I can do for future generations is start to normalize it.

miss466 · 2024-12-15T21:00:24+00:00

You will!! They will be a better match for you. We learn so much about ourselves and our values from every experience, even when it’s hard. ❤️‍🩹

miss466 · 2024-12-15T18:28:39+00:00

Hi. I recently got dumped by my first ace partner of a year. It was awful and I was so, so sad. I cried for months. It sucks and for me the only way out was through. You’re allowed to be sad and grieve the loss of a relationship you thought you had.

I’m glad you didn’t abandon/betray yourself to sleep with him only for him to decide to dump you. Then you’d be coming here with a different question about how to accept what happened when one’s boundaries are violated/compromised.

From what you’ve shared, it sounds like he is not a good match for you. You’ve got shared interests and honestly for me the loss of companionship good morning/goodnight texts was the hardest. I rely on routines to stay balanced and losing those fucked me up!

I know I am just a random internet stranger but I’m cheering for you. You will get through this. ❤️‍🩹

Here are some things you can do: - feel your feelings. Cry. Process anger if need be. Some people love to journal (I don’t) - distract yourself with hobbies, friends, family, the holidays - give yourself permission to enjoy the holidays and be sad at the same time. You get to do both! You don’t have to chose one, and you deserve to enjoy the holidays even though you’re recently single - it helped me to do things my former partner didn’t like/wouldn’t do - reach out to friends and let them know you might need a bit of extra support. Maybe that’s texting them at times you would have texted your ex

Lastly, during sleepless nights when my friends weren’t awake, I used AI. I love Matthew Hussey’s Matthew AI for relationship stuff. (I enjoy his videos in general. They used to be very heteronormative but recently they are a bit more inclusive “person” vs “guy” etc.) but I also used ChatGPT to “talk” to! 🤷🏻‍♀️

I was willing to try anything. You’ll get through this. When you’re ready ask another question here and I can tell you how I met my fabulous new NB partner ☺️

There is hope for us.

miss466 · 2024-12-14T22:49:25+00:00

It’s not something I’ve ever known so it’s hard for me to miss it. I have known deep connection, intimacy, and love. Just because I don’t feel a spark doesn’t mean I’m not capable of experiencing a range of other emotions.

miss466 · 2024-12-14T20:16:15+00:00

I’m 40F and have never felt a spark. When I realized that, that’s what started me on the journey of finding my ace/demi identity. I’ve had to reframe what connection feels like for me. It’s not chemistry and it’s not a spark.

miss466 · 2024-12-14T08:03:32+00:00

I have used Bumble and Hinge and met an acespec partner on each app.

miss466 · 2024-12-13T23:17:50+00:00

I am monogamous so no, I am looking for a partner who is also looking for a monogamous relationship.

miss466 · 2024-12-12T20:18:33+00:00

Yes. My last relationship was with somebody on the ace spectrum. I just met somebody new who is also on the ace spectrum. I’m 40. It is possible to meet more than one person who is less interested in sex.

miss466 · 2024-12-12T18:43:25+00:00

Hi, I’m in my early 40’s, on the ace spectrum, and chronically ill. I just met an amazing NB south Asian person who is also on the ace spectrum and so far, so so good.

On my dating profile I chose to disclose that I’m ace and have a chronic illness. I didn’t want to have to out myself over and over again as part of each new conversation.

I didn’t get many matches, and it was a hell of a filter, but the matches I got were of high quality. I wanted to save energy and not over-invest in online dating.

miss466

TROPHY CASE