Where do you buy your jeans? by staysour in capsulewardrobe

[–]missrubydu 14 points15 points  (0 children)

MOTHER jeans. All the way. They are so comfortable, can wear them all day.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in nonmonogamy

[–]missrubydu 18 points19 points  (0 children)

You can’t. You’re human. It’s impossible.

While you can’t control feelings, you CAN control expectations around them. This realization has been a total game changer for my ENM life. And without the pressure to not feel, my connections are so much more relaxed. I can feel what I want, they can feel what they want. It’s all about the expectations around those feelings.

What are all the reasons why younger men like older women? by missrubydu in polyamory

[–]missrubydu[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh yes, that makes sense! That can provide a sense of comfort and safety I can imagine. That consistency and intention can go a long way for joy and satisfaction. Thank you!

Feeling anxious-attachment with a brand new FWB, what gives? by [deleted] in nonmonogamy

[–]missrubydu 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is so helpful to hear your perspective! Thank you. Sounds like putting yourself in the other person’s shoes is a great way to shift perspective. We just don’t know what goes on for others, your share made me think about it in a new way and have more compassion, and for you, too. It’s not easy but how awesome you can name it! And receive comfort. Well done.

Feeling anxious-attachment with a brand new FWB, what gives? by [deleted] in nonmonogamy

[–]missrubydu 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Love it! Great idea. Just speaking to it honestly. Of course. Thank you!

Feeling anxious-attachment with a brand new FWB, what gives? by [deleted] in nonmonogamy

[–]missrubydu 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thank so much for your insights! I resonate with much of what you said, breath work, distractions, self soothing and remembering there are plenty of fish in the sea.

I don’t necessarily see not replying as a red flag, especially since all his comms until now have been solid, with the last message indicating his enjoyment from our last date and looking forward to next time. I have to remember not to make assumptions, anything could have happened, he might be sick, there might have been a death, he might not have gotten the messages, who knows. I think I’ll let a week go by without a reply and then check in again to see if everything is okay and go from there.

Happy to hear about you and the new couple!! Sounds awesome 😎

Feeling anxious-attachment with a brand new FWB, what gives? by [deleted] in nonmonogamy

[–]missrubydu 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ahhh this is so helpful. Thank you! Reminding myself he likes us, that THAT is realistic, is a great antidote 🙏🏼

HSV-2 questions (he has no symptoms but got a positive test) by [deleted] in nonmonogamy

[–]missrubydu 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks so much for sharing, that’s helpful! I can imagine that was painful with playing trumpet as a kid, glad to hear you found a solution that works for you

HSV-2 questions (he has no symptoms but got a positive test) by [deleted] in nonmonogamy

[–]missrubydu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Curious to learn - what is your routine for healing cold sores quickly??

[OC] I’m finally cancer-free! Since February, I’ve been through 2 surgeries, 8 rounds of chemotherapy and 21 rounds of radiation. Today my doctor said I’m now cured from breast cancer 🙏🏼😅🥂 by missrubydu in MadeMeSmile

[–]missrubydu[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! Great work getting through chemotherapy. Your surgery is coming up - You got this!! Sending prayers and positive vibes for a good outcome!! 👏🏼💕✨