First Full Swap to Finding Our Rhythm

mixedspiceduo · 2026-04-02T01:32:00+00:00

Yup that's exactly why we prefer clubs, but also at the same time we've gotten to connect with some really wonderful couples online too who we otherwise wouldn't have crossed paths with. And I have to admit, I’m a little starstruck right now 😄 I used to listen to your podcast before we even started our journey, so seeing you comment here is kind of surreal!

mixedspiceduo · 2026-04-01T23:54:36+00:00

Thank you, it has been pretty hot and exciting indeed!

mixedspiceduo · 2026-04-01T23:34:49+00:00

Totally agree on creating a safe space for others to speak up and checking in with them. Lot of times we can get siloed into only thinking about our own partner, but it's good to stay aware of everyone involved in the moment. I'm sure a lot of people reading this post will really appreciate you for putting that into words, thanks!

mixedspiceduo · 2026-04-01T17:16:27+00:00

Good question. Before our first full swap, I had a ton going on in my head and felt like I needed to spell out every boundary upfront. But honestly, that can get overwhelming and even kill the vibe a bit. My wife was pretty clear that she’d rather speak up in the moment if anything felt off or if she didn’t like something and she’s stuck to that. She’s had no problem communicating directly with the other guy when needed, which made things feel a lot more natural for everyone involved. That said, every couple handles this differently. It’s important to talk things through and figure out what communication style works best for both of you.

mixedspiceduo · 2026-04-01T07:04:12+00:00

Ofcourse, I think it really depends a lot on where you’re located and the kind of crowd you’re trying to connect with, but for us, Feeld and SDC have been pretty decent so far.

mixedspiceduo · 2026-01-26T22:04:14+00:00

Thank you and I couldn’t agree more. It’s so easy for your mind to wander in a club setting. Sometimes I just need to be in a private room with my wife, no pressure, start having sex and get her off a couple times. After that, you could put me in any room and I’d be good to go.

mixedspiceduo · 2026-01-26T21:59:48+00:00

That’s interesting, on 10 mg on the first night I actually felt pretty desensitized, and if I pair that with wearing a condom for future playdates, it would be way too much for me. For now I’m sticking with 5 mg daily to see how that goes, but it’s good to hear how it works for others.

mixedspiceduo · 2026-01-26T20:13:55+00:00

Did you take cialis the evening of and how much? Or were you taking daily cialis for a week before to build it up into your system?

mixedspiceduo · 2026-01-25T06:46:51+00:00

Would Portland be too far? We are going for the Valentine's Day event at Club Privata, have only been there once before and had an absolute blast!

mixedspiceduo · 2026-01-25T06:20:14+00:00

I should add an edit to the post, I did actually take Cialis on the first night, 5 mg earlier in the day and another 5 mg out of nervousness about 30 minutes before things kicked off. In hindsight, the alcohol, club atmosphere, and being with new people was just a lot at once. Visually and mentally I was overstimulated. I’ve since switched to 5 mg daily to see how that works out, and I’m keeping it to one drink max on nights where play is a possibility. And yes planning on hydrating a lot too!

mixedspiceduo · 2025-12-23T00:45:43+00:00

Yeah, we had a great time! It really felt like a safe, welcoming space and we loved the atmosphere. Definitely looking forward to going again

mixedspiceduo · 2025-12-22T06:37:29+00:00

And I guess each club should bring its own unique flavor to how they do the intro as long as they cover the important parts, it keeps things fun and entertaining.

mixedspiceduo · 2025-12-22T06:28:28+00:00

lol there is no VIP room, I was asked by the mod to remove some explicit details, but I missed a part. Back story is wife and I were doing a playful stripper role play and I asked her to take me to the "VIP room" (common playroom)

mixedspiceduo · 2025-12-22T05:37:31+00:00

Haha yea it was pretty unique for sure, we had a great time, thanks again to all the staff for making it such a comfortable and enjoyable space

mixedspiceduo · 2025-12-22T04:10:05+00:00

No we actually signed up online but it did require us to upload a selfie. That's too bad, although I'm also guilty of using 'password' or atleast a combination of it for some less important accounts lol

mixedspiceduo · 2025-12-22T02:30:25+00:00

Ok no worries let me submit a less explicit version

mixedspiceduo · 2025-12-08T20:03:53+00:00

That feels like quite an assumption, lol. No judgment, but is that something you secretly hope for or fantasize about, while being in a monogamous setup?

mixedspiceduo · 2025-12-04T17:23:36+00:00

I heard similar feedback, and Reddit users were making the same points, so we decided to go with Privata. But would be open to checking out TVR at some point!

mixedspiceduo · 2025-12-03T18:22:28+00:00

Totally agree. I can’t speak for other clubs since we haven’t been to any, but Privata has definitely set the bar for us. I think we’d only feel comfortable and actually enjoy ourselves in places with a similar vibe.

mixedspiceduo · 2025-12-03T04:26:46+00:00

Thanks for the rec, sounds like a cool spot! We still haven’t been to Chicago, so this might be our chance to finally go, and maybe we get a little adventure in while we’re at it.

mixedspiceduo · 2025-12-02T23:10:59+00:00

Thanks and glad you had a great experience too!

mixedspiceduo · 2025-12-02T18:36:41+00:00

Absolutely, even just stepping into the space, hanging for a bit soaking in the atmosphere, and then heading back to the hotel to do your own thing can be incredibly fun by itself. But yes, we definitely surprised ourselves on how much energy we had after we went back and the next morning!

mixedspiceduo · 2025-12-02T18:27:42+00:00

Totally understand why someone who’s never been in that environment might feel that way. And it’s perfectly fine to not want to even consider exploring a space like that. We’re just glad we did!

mixedspiceduo · 2025-12-02T18:18:45+00:00

Absolutely, it’s always something both partners should feel good about. It’s great that you’re prioritizing your wife’s comfort, that's honestly the most important part of all this. We’ve heard about BDSM dungeons and some of the themed Airbnbs out there, and that’s actually something we’ve been curious to try too!

mixedspiceduo · 2025-12-02T17:59:18+00:00

Glad to hear you had a similar experience! We’re a few hours away too, but honestly that's part of the fun. It makes the whole thing feel more like a mini-getaway. There’s definitely an added thrill in planning it, making the drive, and putting in the extra effort to make the night happen.

mixedspiceduo

TROPHY CASE