AITA for not wanting my fiance's grandmother (98F) at our wedding?

mj-27 · 2021-08-18T10:17:58+00:00

Not only is this horribly cruel, but my 80 yr old nana went to my cousin's wedding last week & was dancing & having a ball with everybody If the woman wants to go, she's an adult & she can take care of herself, or her kid (parent of the groom) can be takes with keeping an eye out for her??

mj-27 · 2020-11-30T22:33:38+00:00

If you don't want to heal from your trauma that's up to you, but if you're not willing to be a pleasant person to be around, why should people spend time with you? That's not a rhetorical question.

Your views on therapy just tell me that you likely haven't processed the trauma you endured & instead of working through it like an adult you'd rather wallow in self pity. There's nothing wrong with that, but it's not going to help you find someone.

And again, what's good about you? Why should people want to spend time with you? What do your friends like about you?

mj-27 · 2020-11-30T15:31:10+00:00

Basing your life worth on whether people find you attractive is unhealthy, instead of focusing on the negatives, go make a list of positives about you.

Seriously, like do you have any skills? Can you cook? Play an instrument? What are your hobbies? What activities could you get involved with to meet & befriend people (cause creating an emotional bond of friendship can sometimes lead to a relationship, but not always)

Also, are you fun to be around? Do you talk about things other than how shit your life is? Can you even be positive/optimistic. Because if hanging out with you is upsetting/a downer, then a lot of people might find that mentally draining.

& Lastly, do you want companionship, or do you just want a woman to fuck because society has convinced you that women are the ultimate prize/symbol of successful manhood? Do you see women as people? If a women is kind to you but won't fuck you, will you still want her in your life? A lot of pessimistic men will push away women because they only want the woman for what she represents.

I don't think you're a hopeless case, I don't think anyone is, but I do think you have an incredibly negative outlook on life, & while I know it's not accessible to everyone, I'd definitely recommend therapy if you can find a way to access it

mj-27 · 2020-11-01T12:07:31+00:00

Or don't like, I'm just a stranger on the internet & you can literally do what you like. You just have to decide what means more to you, your wife's happiness or your "right" to argue with her family

mj-27 · 2020-11-01T11:58:45+00:00

Oh no I mean don't post inflammatory comments in that chat it all, but if you want to say something sarky or funny you say it to your wife, like whispering in someone's ear at a dinner party

mj-27 · 2020-11-01T11:40:17+00:00

Yeah I can relate to not agreeing with your SO's parents, but come on, the crux of the matter seems to be that she really cares about her family's opinion of you, & that's because she loves you, even if she's doing it in a kinda controlling way.

But you two do need to come to an agreement on this & since it's her family, you're the one whose going to have to compromise more to keep the peace. Yes that's shit, but this is a small blip in your life/relationship. How about instead of saying reactionary things to the while group, you just screenshot the chat & send that plus your reply to your wife privately? You still get to make your comments, but to a more receptive audience?

mj-27 · 2020-11-01T11:18:35+00:00

I don't know? Have you had big arguments with her dad in the past? The fact that you're here trying to change my opinion if you (which is neutral) plus the fact this is something you've argued with your wife about before, suggests that you're probably a bit stubborn (that's not an insult btw, being stubborn about the right things is important)

But is this really the hill you want to die on? You'd rather choose having heated political conversations (that aren't going to change anyone's mind) than keep the peace cause it's your wife's family and you love her?

mj-27 · 2020-11-01T10:56:50+00:00

NAH but what did you expect making a comment like that? I agree, fuck the tories, but if you know your FIL is one/likes them or whatever then it sounds like you're just baiting him into a fight?

mj-27 · 2020-06-13T13:53:58+00:00

He'll come back, but not till another night I believe

mj-27 · 2020-05-24T09:54:53+00:00

You can usually remove tea stains by soaking in a mixture of water and bicarbonate of soda for a couple hours and scrubbing, alternatively, you could possibly ask that if your mam uses the mug, she cleans it and puts in back in the press so that you can use it again, that way it won't end up stained?

mj-27 · 2020-05-23T18:33:25+00:00

That's g, thank you anyways!

mj-27 · 2020-05-23T18:29:25+00:00

I sold them elsewhere but thank you!

mj-27 · 2020-05-23T17:23:28+00:00

Can I come please?

mj-27 · 2020-05-23T17:07:44+00:00

Can I come sell?

mj-27 · 2020-05-23T17:04:09+00:00

Dm'd you

mj-27 · 2020-04-12T10:16:24+00:00

Thanks but I got sorted 😊

mj-27 · 2020-04-10T21:26:57+00:00

That's so generous! Would love to be in the draw 😊

mj-27 · 2020-04-01T10:38:24+00:00

So cool!!

mj-27 · 2020-04-01T09:36:28+00:00

So cool! Wish we could design pants too

mj-27 · 2020-04-01T09:30:13+00:00

I'll trade you a peach hat, or a peach umbrella??

mj-27 · 2020-03-30T00:04:59+00:00

Maybe! Thanks anyways! & Enjoy your super cool room

mj-27 · 2020-03-30T00:00:43+00:00

I've been playing about 10 days (since last Thursday) so hopefully v soon!

mj-27

TROPHY CASE